Vent

bethsmiles

Ok this going to sound super whiny but I just need to get it out.

I recently moved to Greeley, which is about an hour and a half away from where BF lives. So now instead of seeing each other every day we can see each other about once a week. Today is the first day I will get to spend with BF since getting back from Christmas break. I did see him last Friday but it was only for a couple hours. So the plan is for him to drive up here and then we are going to spend the day together.

Well it's almost noon and he still isn't here. He specifically told me last night he was getting up at 8 so that he could be up here earlier so we could really spend the whole day together. He always does this. It takes him forever to get anywhere and honestly it pisses me off. I feel like I'm always waiting on him and he knows it drives me insane. I got up early (after having trouble sleeping last night because I'm a little sick) to get ready and now I've just been sitting around waiting. It is so frustrating and now I'm going to be in a bad mood when he finally does get here.

I know I'm being bratty and it's not that big of a deal but I'm still pissed.

Elle1036

I would be frustrated, too.  And I would tell him so.

Are you planning to call him out at all, or will you just brush it off?  I mean, you don't want to pick a fight and ruin your one day together, but, at the same time, he needs to know how important this time is to you.  Hmmm.

polkadot111

Jeff does this too. Says, "Oh I will leave early. By noon." Then he calls me at two and says he's leaving. WHAT?! I always get frustrated. But normally when we visit each other we have all weekend together, not just a day. So it's not as big of a deal if he is a few hours later than planned. He's just slow movin' sometimes.

kellyt89

XBF was famous for this. BF is better but sometimes still is a little more slow moving than I'd like. It's definitely a pain.

What if you both planned something fun next time for you to do that he'd have to be there at a certain time for? Then you'd have something specific to look forward to and you'll know when he'll be there.

jaycee7389

I would probably be annoyed as well. I'm with Elle, it's hard to figure out what's the better option..fight on your only day together or put it on the back burner. Maybe you could decide on a time so that it isn't left up for interpretation and disappointment. It may be early to him and not to you..YKWIM?

QuiltingNurse

I would be pretty frustrated/upset as well... In saying that, I am ALWAYS running late. I mean well, and try to get out the door on time and take a direct route to where I'm going, but it doesn't always happen. I hate getting out of bed in the morning and when 

I say I plan on doing something early, I usually end up changing plans because I'm so warm and cozy in my bed. I would talk to him and see if there is a reason for this, maybe he is like me and just gets side tracked or something comes up last minute. If it always happens try to figure out a solution such as setting an alarm to make sure he's on time, setting a reservation for a certain time so there is no confusion on when he needs to be there, and have him call you when he is on his way so you're not wondering. 

lavenderfields13

Ugh that is really frustrating. Before BF and I moved in together we only saw each other a couple days a week and since we work opposite schedules it would be only for a couple hours and then I'd have to go to sleep or he'd have to go to work. So I get that you want to make the most of the time you do have together.

My BF is ALWAYS late also. He moves so slowly and it takes him forever to leave the house! If he says "I'll be there in 10 minutes" I know that means more like a half an hour. One of my nicknames for him is actually Turtle.

I wouldn't want to make a huge deal out of it and ruin your day together but I would mention that you were a little upset because you were looking forward to spending the WHOLE day together. But I'm a whiney brat a lot too. lol

tdwpg1984

I HATE when people are late. I actually think it's super disrespectful. By being late you BF is essentially telling you his time is more valuable than yours. If he says he'll be there at noon and doesn't get there until 2, he's saying he needed those 2 hours to do something important, but that you didn't have anything important to do so you could just wait around for him to show up when he feels like it. And I'm sure that if he had said he'd be there at 2, you would have found something 'important' to do during those 2 hours that you then spent waiting, not knowing when he would show up.

If someone is 5-10 minutes late from time to time I don't see that as a big deal, but whenever someone is consistently very late, I feel you need to sit down with them and figure out the problem, cuz like I said, it's disrespectful.

bethsmiles

Sorry yesterday's post was a P&R. BF decided to spend the night at my place since he was late yesterday so I couldn't stay too mad at him.

HULU

One of my ex's was really, really bad about this. Siriusly. I remember on one occassion specifically, he was telling me that his buddy was having a HALO party the day me and him were supposed to spend together. He really wanted to go, so we compromised that he would just bring me along (his friends said "The more the merrier"), so I was okay with that. He told me "I'll pick you up in an hour or so."

Two hours later, I'm calling him, trying to get in touch with him. He's not answering his phone, so I call his mom to ask if she knows where he is (more because I'm afraid something might be wrong, not so much because he's insanely late). She tells me he said he was going to stop by his cousin's house on the way to pick up something. I was relieved, so I stopped worrying as much.

3 hours after he was supposed to be there.

3 hours since the time I started WAITING for him to pick me up.

He calls.

Turns out, he had decided not to go to the party and was at his cousin's house playing video games. When I asked WHYTHEFUQ didn't he call and tell me he wasn't coming, his reply? "I don't get any reception down here in the basement."

I wanted to kill him. So, even though it's not relationship breaking, I'm not going to tell you that "I don't see what the problem is, you should just get over it. " It's nice to vent about something minor and not have people crawl all over you.