So, am I bad person?

hetshup

So what do you think:

FI is a pilot, and we have the ability to fly stand by to anywhere in the Northern Hemisphere. For Labor Day weekend, he wants to go somewhere, mainly b\c he has 8 days off and life has been totally nuts recently. Considering we just moved, don't know the area at all and have been spending money hand over fist, I would rather stay around and get to know the area (I might also want to hit up labor day sales for honeymoon clothes). So he's hurt, and I'm upset that he's hurt.

What would you do?

PaigeMcC

Can you compromise? Go somewhere for a bit/stay home for a bit?

catemeg

Yeah, I can understand that.  It's sometimes nice to just relax at home.  But perhaps you can compromise?  Do a daytrip up to NYC or Chicago or something fairly close (as opposed to West Coast)?  That would be a quick flight, you wouldn't really have to splurge for a hotel, and have lots of flexibility on flights.  That way, you can still spend 2 days enjoying DC (may I suggest heading out to the vineyards?  It's a great way to spend a weekend, and totally relaxing).

oceana919

Could you do half and half? Spend a few days tooling around your new digs, then take 2-3 days and go somewhere awesome?

ps. After wedding = COME TO SOFLA. That's an order.

rickylee244

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_am-bad-person?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:df8cf9d2-7330-4f2c-a5db-db88467fa388Post:88e024f1-f6a6-4384-a7fa-305d176c10c9">Re: So, am I bad person?</a>:
[QUOTE]Could you do half and half? Spend a few days tooling around your new digs, then take 2-3 days and go somewhere awesome? ps. After wedding = COME TO SOFLA. That's an order.
Posted by oceana919[/QUOTE]

Make that two orders. 

And just what I was going to suggest.

hetshup

Oh, I don't really want to relax at home, I've never been to DC or really anywhere on the east coast, so I was hoping to spend some time seeing what we have here. Not gonna lie, I was hoping to spend a few hours in the Smithsonian.

Any suggestions of places that we could go?


Ok Ocean.... I'll come down. Twist my arm.

nottheonlydreamer44

You aren't a bad person, you did just pick up your life and move in a hurry, I would be dead tired; props to you, chick. I agree with everyone else and try and do a 3 day trip -- 8 would be too much, I think, since your honeymoon is right around the corner!

Getting away for 2-3 days may renergize you and get you back to your new environment feeling even better. You and FI can do something fun and lose some of the moving stress (which I may be incorrectly assuming that you have!).

I'm jealous.... send me, lol.

oceana919

::arm twist::

Say the date, and I'll have cupcakes and mojitos waiting for you. Nothing but 5 Star service at Hotel de Oceana.

Definitely go to the Smithsonian, it rocks

As for recommendations for a weekend trip, I would recommend Charleston SC or Savannah - they're both gorgeous, have lots of culture, pretty sightseeing and good food.

Acrosthec

If you come to Savannah you must let me know!

I agree with everyone else; I don't think you're a bad person.  I would offer a compromise.  Even flying down to Savannah/Charleston area is only an hour or two flight (I think) and you can just bum around for the weekend and relax, then go back to DC area and see what there is to see.  I can totally understand wanting to take the time off to explore your new living area.

Hazel_B

I wouldn't say you are a bad person at all. You've been on the go for what the last month non stop? Is there a specific reason that your FI wants to go away somewhere? Does he know your new area really well already?

If you are up to going somewhere, go somewhere close.

hetshup

I texted him to ask if he wants to go to Savannah or Charleston (Acro or Narwal.... wanna meet me in all my pale glory?), leave Friday and come back on Sunday morning, then have Sunday and Monday to see friends and tool around here.


He wants to go b\c he has 8 days off, which is unheard of in the pilot world. But I just started this new job and I can't just bail immediately. I'm trying to compromise, we shall see.

heyimbren

Don't go to the Spy Museum in DC. It was seriously disappointing

And.... that's all I've got. I'm jealous that your FI is a pilot and you guys can just take off like that for a little getaway.

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_am-bad-person?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:df8cf9d2-7330-4f2c-a5db-db88467fa388Post:4a8f058a-2e16-40ef-9fc3-0ce5b27a9b92">Re: So, am I bad person?</a>:
[QUOTE]If you come to Savannah you must let me know! I agree with everyone else; I don't think you're a bad person.  I would offer a compromise.  Even flying down to Savannah/Charleston area is only an hour or two flight (I think) and you can just bum around for the weekend and relax, then go back to DC area and see what there is to see.  I can totally understand wanting to take the time off to explore your new living area.
Posted by Acrosthec[/QUOTE]

ps. We're definitely swinging through Savannah on Thanksgiving...trying to time it so we get into Savannah in the mid-afternoon and will probably hang out until about 7:30-8... :D

hetshup

Ocean, can we still be friends if I'm not a huge fan of mojitos?

oceana919

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_am-bad-person?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:df8cf9d2-7330-4f2c-a5db-db88467fa388Post:9aa2daaf-f169-4e23-913e-c841611b8d26">Re: So, am I bad person?</a>:
[QUOTE]Ocean, can we still be friends if I'm not a huge fan of mojitos?
Posted by hetshup[/QUOTE]

Take Your Pick:

Mojito
Margarita
Martini
Daquiri
Buttery Nipples
Lots of other shots with inappropriate names

hetshup

I think we need to see how rum soaked my honeymoon is before I can make a determination. I love mojitos without the mint, I just don't know what that's called.

catemeg

THINGS TO DO IN DC

Best of the Smithsonians:

National Gallery - it's right next to the Capital building on the north-west side of the Mall (the long strip of grass in the center of DC).  This is an absolutely beautiful museum, lots of famous pieces of art, and a gorgeous building.  I can spend days in there.

Air & Space Museum - two down from the Capital building on the south-west side of the Mall.  Okay, this is a MUST if he's a pilot!  It's an older museum, and currently going under renovations, but it's still totally awesome.  You can also do simulation flights together where you can flip the plane over and everything - even though he flies for real, I bet it'd be fun to make him sit as co-pilot while you 'flew'!

American History Museum - first one on the Mall next to the Washington Monument - if you're walking towards the Capital building from the Washington Monument, it'll be on your left.  Recently reopened from an extensive renovation - it's pretty awesome!  You can see George Washington's old uniform, Dorothy's ruby slippers, a dead stuffed horse from the Civil War (so weird, but cool).  It's a fantastic museum!

Native American History Museum - the newest of the Smithsonians, this one is right next to the Capital building on the south-west side of the Mall.  The archetecture of the building is incredible, the museum is fantastic.  If you have to eat on the mall, DEFINITELY do this cafeteria!  The food is all made in the same way that the tribes made it (salmon is smoked straight over fire in the cafeteria).  It's also not ridiculous expensive for food in tourist areas of DC.  It's the only place worth eating anywhere near the Mall.

The other museums aren't my favorite and I can't even think of anything specific to say about them.  Natural History is like dinosaur bones and gems and stuff, the modern art musem is just weird in my opinion (but I'm uncultured like that), and then there's the Asian art museum which is cool but I only went once.



Non-Smithsonian Museums:

This you will have to pay to see, but depending on your interests can be worth it.

Newseum - a museum about the news - it has one of the best views of the city EVER, and I've heard is a fantastic museum.  A little pricey to get in, but worth it.  I have yet to go as I moved out shortly after it opened, but I've heard it's awesome.

Spy Museum - it's designed for children, but if you're into spy stuff, it's worth a look.  This is a museum where you want to take the time to see the movies and read the placards since they have so much information and that's what makes it interesting.  I actually LOVE this museum, but didn't go often as it cost $15.

Madam Toussand's Wax Museum - a waste of time and money, in my opinion.  There are far better Madam Toussand's in other cities, and this one is way overpriced.


Monuments:

My favorite is the Jefferson and then the FDR monuments.  You can walk around all of them, and rent paddle boats in front of the Jefferson for $8/hour or something ridiculously cheap.  The only one you need a ticket is the Washington Monument to get to the top - you can either reserve ahead of time, or show up when they open at 8am (9am during some times of year, so look it up) to get the tickets they have available for the day.  Tickets are usually free, but if you get them online you pay a small fee for reserving them.

Non-Museum things to see:

Dupont Circle - restaurant and bar scene, the hub of the DC gay community

Adams Morgan - restaurant and bar scene

Georgetown (M Street and Wisconsin) - shops, restaurants, cafes - GEORGETOWN CUPCAKES!  Gotta show up when they open, otherwise you're gonna be waiting a long time to get in.  If you friend them on Facebook, they have a flavor of the day that they announce just before opening and for the first 100 people to request it by name, they get it free.

Washington Harbor (just south of Georgetown) - restaurants, bars, boats (the salmon and artichoke dip at Tony & Joe's is one of my favorite).

You can go under the Key Bridge to rent kayaks and putz around the Potomac (but don't fall in - it's gross).



Outside DC:

Vineyards!  Oh my goodness, I miss this so badly!  Spend a day tasting wines for $5-10 per tasting, you get to keep the wine glasses, and the area is just beautiful, with rolling hills and miles of grape vines and horse pastures.  Check out: www.virginiawine.org

desertsun

I the National Museum of Women in the Arts, to add to Cate's list!

But what about going somewhere beachy for a couple of days and just laying around? That always sounds relaxing to me, so you might enjoy that after the rushing around and stress of the last several weeks. And then you're going somewhere with Will. What do you think?

notquiteblushing

You're not a bad person.  You just moved and D.C. is such a great area to explore.  I vote staycation.  FI can go on a trip with the rest of his days off, right?  But I agree you can't take days off at a new job.

hetshup

Oh gosh Cate, that's quite a list. I don't think we'll get to all that, and I will be hitting up the natural history museum. I like rocks. A lot.

Desert- I haven't heard back from him yet, it would be nice to just relax, as it's becoming more and more clear that things are not going to calm down anytime soon. Remember we do have 6 days in Belize to look forward to!

notquiteblushing

Yeah I always think I can do more than one museum a day but then you feel rushed.  Since you're so close to D.C. I wouldn't try to do too much.  Also hit up the zoo!

hetshup

I love the Zoo! Do they have pandas?

notquiteblushing

They did have pandas when I lived in D.C.  I don't know if they're still around.  Let me check.

notquiteblushing

Yes, two adult pandas and a baby panda, aww.

http://nationalzoo.si.edu/Animals/GiantPandas/

catemeg

Yeah, that's definitely not a "one weekend" list - but things to keep in mind during your time living in the area!

And yeah, I'm not such a big fan of rocks. I  just remember going to that museum and seeing the dioramas of cave men, and I thought it was dumb.  So the Natural History Museum is not my style, but I get why it would be for some people.

2 museums a day is usually good, unless you like to get super intense in which case each museum could be a full day adventure.

[Deleted User]

hetshup - I'd be saying the same thing you are.  Although I'm not big on traveling either, I always need a vacation from my vacation.  But someplace where you can just chill and relax on the beach or something would be nice as well.

Do make sure you take advantage of those sales, too!

katanne9

I would totally feel the exact same way as you. We've been home for a week now and I still feel scattered.

I agree with PPs. Can you take a weekend away somewhere?

How about you guys come to Boston next Tuesday evening. I think some people might want to hang out with you.

ekathleen684

As a fellow free standby flyer, I'd suggest looking up a day trip or so. FI has mentioned us flying to LA for a day and coming home on the red eye- his boss did that yesterday. We have done Chicago in a day (left at 7, home by 6) and had a ball

NOTE: I don't know who you can fly with but if I remember correctly, US Airways has flights between DC and Boston Logan every hour and I think the flight was only an hour long.

Man, I haven't been anywhere in so long...

bajediva

Yes. Yes, you are a bad person. I'm so glad you've asked, I couldn't find a polite way to tell you before.

But unreasonable and inconsiderate? No. Everybody else has already said the key word here - compromise. Maybe if FI really wants to be a way for longer than 2-3 days, you can take a trip together, you stay for half of it, and then head back, leaving you each with a couple days alone time for whatever is most important to you individually? Other options that have already been said are good ones too, just throwing this one out there.

jeanacorina

Yes, you are an awful person and you should be ashamed of yourself.

hetshup

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_am-bad-person?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:df8cf9d2-7330-4f2c-a5db-db88467fa388Post:ae85116d-c15f-40de-8147-06cceb1aaaa9">Re: So, am I bad person?</a>:
[QUOTE]Yes, you are an awful person and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Posted by jeanacorina[/QUOTE]

I am so shamed. Nobody likes me, everybody hates me.



Might as well go eat worms.