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engagement party, no wedding?!

deliciousxmaadeliciousxmaa
in Not Engaged Yet

is it possible to have an engagement party but no wedding for everyone to go to? i was thinking about a destination wedding with just our immediate family. but want to celebrate with everyone somehow. not sure what to do. any suggestions? thank you in advanced!

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Re: engagement party, no wedding?!

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    desertsundesertsun member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I'm not sure why you're posting this on the Not Engaged Yet board?

    There's a destination weddings board that would know more than I about these things, but my understanding is that it is acceptable to have an "at home reception" when you get back.

    An engagement party is something someone else throws for you shortly after getting engaged, but technically, traditional etiquette is that anyone invited to any pre-wedding parties also gets invited to the wedding, so just be aware of that.

    Additionally, it makes more sense to celebrate your wedding AFTER it happens instead of before, esp since an engagement party is generally closer to the engagement than the wedding chronologically.


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    ravenrayravenray member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    You are aware this is the NEY board?  We don't plan engagement parties. Try the E board.  Though I am pretty sure I know what their answer will be.
    "Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained"-C.S. Lewis

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    calindicalindi member
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    edited December 2011
    I second everything Desert said so eloquently and tactfully.

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    desertsundesertsun member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-party-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:e02efc8b-338d-47dd-8700-dc31264bc241Post:bc686695-7bef-4d7d-ab20-8e596789e6d5">Re: engagement party, no wedding?!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I second everything Desert said so eloquently and tactfully.
    Posted by calindi[/QUOTE]

    Oooh, thank you! I'm trying to grow some tact in my old age. ;)
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    leia1979leia1979 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    What Desert said.

    But this is really more appropriate for the Etiquette board or Destination Weddings board.

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    becunning2becunning2 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-party-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:e02efc8b-338d-47dd-8700-dc31264bc241Post:08527633-cc9d-45af-88df-85a5bc9482b4">Re: engagement party, no wedding?!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: engagement party, no wedding?! : Oooh, thank you! I'm trying to grow some tact in my old age. ;)
    Posted by desertsun[/QUOTE]

    Any tips you want to share?  I'm woefully lacking.
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    LizzyTish88LizzyTish88 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I find it very hard to take anyone with the sn "deliciousxmaa" seriously.
    friends tv show funy
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    Ember01Ember01
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-party-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:e02efc8b-338d-47dd-8700-dc31264bc241Post:28672b02-12b1-474c-acf0-7a83433c75ae">Re: engagement party, no wedding?!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I find it very hard to take anyone with the sn "deliciousxmaa" seriously.
    Posted by cdechristopher[/QUOTE]

    This made me laugh!
    ~~December 3, 2011~~
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    Beads921Beads921 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    18 cheers for Desert and CDE. I agree with both of you.
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    SKP82SKP82 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-party-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:e02efc8b-338d-47dd-8700-dc31264bc241Post:c7cebd5f-c788-40c0-a8e3-c24579ed3f68">engagement party, no wedding?!</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong> is it possible</strong> to have an engagement party but no wedding for everyone to go to? i was thinking about a destination wedding with just our immediate family. but want to celebrate with everyone somehow. not sure what to do. any suggestions? thank you in advanced!
    Posted by deliciousxmaa[/QUOTE]

    Yes, of course it is POSSIBLE.

    Oh, you mean is it acceptable?  I don't know.  Go ask E.
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    "Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make life so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce." - Natalie Goldberg
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    lmwilberlmwilber member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    What Desert said is correct, though I feel compelled by the ghost of Miss Manners to add that your AHR is not a re-do of your wedding. Etiquette wise, it should be a slightly more casual affair, kind of like a meet and greet for the new bride and groom. You can have a religious official of your choice bless your vows, if you wish. But all the typically wedding things like the big puffy dress, first dance, and bouquet toss are out. You had your wedding, you don't get to have a second one. Maybe for your 25th anniversary, but not a few weeks later.

    Edit:grammar
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    AudgiePodgeAudgiePodge member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_engagement-party-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:e02efc8b-338d-47dd-8700-dc31264bc241Post:7c4c2832-19cd-45a0-8969-0d723dfd8975">Re: engagement party, no wedding?!</a>:
    [QUOTE]What Desert said is correct, though I feel compelled by the ghost of Miss Manners to add that your AHR is not a re-do of your wedding. Etiquette wise, it should be a slightly more casual affair, kind of like a meet and greet for the new bride and groom. You can have a religious official of your choice bless your vows, if you wish. But all the typically wedding things like the big puffy dress, first dance, and bouquet toss are out. You had your wedding, you don't get to have a second one. Maybe for your 25th anniversary, but not a few weeks later. Edit:grammar
    Posted by lmwilber[/QUOTE]

    An AHR is completely different than a vow renewal, which I think you're thinking of.
    I'm not good at feelings.

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    lmwilberlmwilber member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Audgie, maybe I am. But is it really ok to have a DW then a big Do -Over back home?
    All I'm saying is that ettiquete wise your AHR really should not be like a second wedding. But I guess its kinda like the Dollar Dance, if its accepted in your circle, then its ok.
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    AudgiePodgeAudgiePodge member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Most AHRs aren't. They are receptions, hence the name. There are no ceremony things involved.
    I'm not good at feelings.

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