Desperate for advice - cheating on fiance

Kat120285

Have to agree to postpone and DEFINITELY forget the other guy. I've been with my fiancé for 8 years already and we are getting married this October. Sure things get comfortable and we have our problems but I honestly couldn't imagine my life with anyone else and so far I just keep getting more and more excited for what will be an absolutely amazing wedding and to call him my husband  I'm sure some weddings are stressful and things get rough between the couple but you can't forget the big picture and what all the hard work is for. If it's not stress from the wedding and you are really not happy and have tried to work things out, honestly, then maybe you aren't meant to be with your fiancé. That being said, at the very least he deserves a shot to fix things and if even after you two have tried it still doesn't seem right, then maybe you should go your separate ways.

sonya+adam

I responded to this a while ago, but I guess it got eaten.

You definitely need to tell your fiance about this, and end one or (preferably) both relationships. Your FI deserves someone who is going to be faithful and honest to him. And if you and this new guy are both cheating on someone, who is to say that either of you won't do it to each other? If you want to make things work between you and your FI, then you definitely need to postpone your wedding, and seek counseling.

WildMagelet

FI was married when we met.  We were friends for more than a year before we discovered our mutual attraction.  His (now ex)wife had brought up getting divorced before we'd ever met and they went through some counseling as a part of the divorce proceedings.

I respect him for respecting his marriage, his children, and his family by NOT trying to cheat with me even though his marriage was ending.  If he'd ever pushed it towards something more while he was still married I wouldn't have stuck around.  If he'd been willing to do it to her & their children then what's to say he wouldn't later do it to me & our (future) child(ren)?

Dump the married guy and forget about him.  Get some therapy for yourself.  Get tested for STDs.  Confess to your FI.  If FI decides he wants to work it out, get couples counseling for the two of you.  Good luck.

ttt222

Thank you, thank you everyone. I'm having such a hard time thinking straight and really appreciate the honest advice. And it's not"MUD" I just created a new account so that I could be anonymous with this. Reading something like this online would not be the way I would want to tell my FI.

chrryblndchick

I call MUD.On the small chance it's not... men like this will say anything to get a woman into bed. The woman who believes this type of man is a moron. OP, you need to tell your FI what's going on and then take a serious look at yourself and the life choices you're making.