name changes?

snugbug42

hey ladies, i was wondering who out there is or isn't taking their husband's last name... and what your reasons were.  My fiancee and i are both very avid femminists, and he doesn't care at all whether i take his name or keep my own.  My decision is made on the matter, but i'm interested in what decisions you all have made, and why?

Leah&Christian09

I didn't change my name.  I didn't really see any good reasons to do so, so I just didn't. 

trix1223

I don't really care whether people do or don't change their names.  In my immediate family, I changed my name, my sister and sister-in-law didn't.  My DD changed her name, but I'll be surprised if my younger DD does.I just find it amusing that people use feminism as an excuse for keeping what is, in the vast majority of circumstances, their father's surname.

mocha beans

I'm going to be changing mine.  I like FI's name better than mine.  I have no desire to keep mine, no major attachment.  FI likes the idea of me taking his also.

anna.oskar

I'd rather not change my name, but I will.  i want to have the same last name as my future kids and his last name is so long that it'd be ridiculous to hyphenate.

sarahmk5

I'm planning on having two last names, so I'll be Sarah Mylast Hislast.  No hyphen.  Our kids will have our last names hyphenated.  My FI is considering doing the same thing I am, so he will be Man Herlast Hislast.

SpringBride1114

I am changing mine. Our son has his last name, and I have always hated mine. I guess I was just brought up that it is the right thing to do.

BubbleJ

Same as PP, we will probably both hyphenate each others names. This way we both have the same last name and we are both taking and giving up the same amount. Much to the disapproval of family, but thats another story for another day.

grace_anthony

i decided to only because i know our future children will so i rather have his last name, its nicer than mine

StessFreeBride

I will change my name eventually. I would also like for all of us to have the same last name when we have children. I am definitely not going to run out to change my last name when we get back from getting married. I keep thinking it'll be easier to change it when I add FI to my health insurance and all of that, just so I don't have to do the paperwork twice, but we'll see.

lyndausvi

I just find it amusing that people use feminism as an excuse for keeping what is, in the vast majority of circumstances, their father's surname.dittoI just added his to mine so now I have 2 last names.  Even though he preferred I only had his last name, he knew it was not his choice to make.  If we have kids they will get his last name.

bablingbrooke

Sarah, delete your post. You put your full name out there and that's not safe since any weirdo can look at these threads. OP, changing or not changing your name has nothing to do with feminism. The feminist movement is all about choice. So whether you change or not, it's a decision that you, and not anyone else, made. FWIW, I took DH's name on our marriage license but I have yet to actually start changing it or going by it (although when people call me Mrs. DH I never correct them). I do want to have the same last name as our kids but will probably use my maiden name professionally.

Irchik22

 I am changing mine becuase FI feels strongly about it and I don't care. Plus he had a really good reason for caring so stongly...he believes our family will always be a stronger unit with one name for us all...so I agreed :-)We are even calling the vet after we get back from the Honeymoon so the fur babies can have the same last name too...LOL

JamesNatasha

Good point about feminism vs. father's surname... lolMy FI's middle name is the same as my last name, and I really wanted us both to hyphenate, but he surprised me by being dead set against it.  He's normally very laid back and not traditional in his ways...I'm usually the one following more traditional roles, but he's set on me taking his last name.  It's not really that big of a deal to me, I just thought it would have been neat for us to hyphenate.  I will probably drop my maiden name and keep my middle name since my first and middle names are the names that my parents actually chose for me.

noelle24

 just find it amusing that people use feminism as an excuse for keeping what is, in the vast majority of circumstances, their father's surname.Once it's your name, I don't think it matters where it came from (father or mother).  This is the name I've had my whole life, and for me, it is part of my identity. That's tough for me to give up in one day.  I'm keeping my last name as of now.  FI was a little hurt when I told him, but I think he realized that it really is my decision.  And I have no problem with our kids having his last name, which is what he was more concerned about. 

noelle24

Plus, giving up a name symbolizes moving from your family to your husband's.  I choose to view marriage as adding to my existing family, and therefore see no need to change my name.  I have no problem with women who choose to change their names.  I'm just trying to give examples of how keeping your name could be viewed in a feminist light despite your name coming from a male lineage at some point.

kate8987

I'm very traditional and old fashioned and both of us come from a Christian home. I don't understand why you wouldn't want to take your husbands name. I will definitley be taking fi's name. I can't wait to become Mrs. Fi, plus his last name is alot shorter than mine and easier write haha!

melishka716

I'm proud of my last name, but didn't want to hyphenate it because I want our children to have the same last name as both FI and I. Instead, I am moving my last name to a second middle name, and will use my second middle name as my middle name on required documents.

Kdavis123103

I am going to take FI's last name but have been wondering if I need to drop my middle name (which I don't like anyway) and use my maiden name as my middle name. My reason for this is because my oldest child has my last name but my younger two ( fi's and mine) have his last name. So I don't want my oldest to be the only one left with my maiden name. I think that would be the right thing to do. I can't wait to finally be Mrs. Marr though!! There's no way I wouldn't change my name! I've been waiting almost 8 years to do it!

VeryZen

I can't wait to change my name!  My mom decided to give me a hyphenated last name with both her maiden name and my dad's last name.  In any case, my last name has been a huge PITA, from questions about it, to people spelling it wrong, to it just being incredibly long and unnecessary..  I also like my FI's last name, so I don't mind changing it.And seriously, I've had enough of the jokes from people saying, "Hey, are you going to add another hyphen to your name and have three last names?...haha."  I know they think they're cute, but stop being ridiculous.

yankees3538

I changed mine (am actually in the process right now, it's not something you can really do in one afternoon or whatever), and it had nothing to do with future children because we aren't having any.  My daughters have their dads' name, and I now have my husband's name and am proud of it.  I figure I took my ex's name when we were married, and he was a total loser, so I actually WANT to take the man's name who has treated me like an absolute princess for the past 10 years.  It's not something I feel I owe him (and he says he doesn't care one way or the other), it's just something I want to do.  And for the record, I'm a firm believer in women's rights here too. 

cantblobubbles

BablingBrook......Sarah's last name is not "Mylast" or "Hislast"..............