Invtied to 2 Weddings on the same weekend -BIG DILEMMA!

mamaplaysmozart

Help! We have a total wedding dilemma situation! One of my best friends and my husband's best friend both got engaged last year. My friend set her wedding date about 4 months ago for Saturday, July 24, 2010 and my daughter was asked to be a flower girl (she'll be about 18 months old next July). The wedding venue is a 3 hour drive from where we live so we were planning to stay overnight at the resort where the wedding is being held. OK now here's the problem: My husband was asked to be the best man at his best friend's wedding. The fiance has been looking at dates with her family. We just found out today that they have confirmed their wedding date for Sunday, July 25, 2010 -the day after my friend's wedding. And here's the kicker...this wedding is going to be in Montreal, which is about an 8 hour drive from where my best friend's wedding is being held. They've looked into other dates and there are really no other options that would work for their family. So in order to attend both weddings, we would have to make the 3 hour drive to the first venue, go to the wedding and then wake up really early the next day to drive 8 hours to try and make it for the second wedding. I just don't think we can feasibly do this -especially with my daughter's medical issues. We've thought about me going to one wedding with the baby and my husband going to the other, but it will be a logistical nightmare trying to arrange for transportation (I don't drive and we only have one car), and I would have a lot of trouble changing the baby's colostomy bag in the hotel alone (it's really a two person job). I've looked into driving up with my friend's sister but they are planning a family vacation around the whole wedding so everyone is arriving a few days earlier and staying a few days after it's over. It's not an option to leave the baby with someone for the weekend because of her medical issues -her colostomy bag needs to be changed every 12-24 hours and you need months of training to learn how to properly do this. My husband and I are really stumped. I feel like I can't miss my friend's wedding and he feels the same about his friend's. What would you do? http://mamaplaysmozart.blogspot.com/

Mrs.B6302007

If you end up going to one wedding together, I'm leaning towards your friend's wedding because you made that commitment first.If you split the weddings, is there anyone else besides the bride's sister you could go with?  What about your mom?  I'm sure under the medical circumstances, your BF would let you bring a guest other than your H.Financially, can you handle two separate weddings with the travel costs?  The 3 hour one would be less expensive as far as travel.

Leah&Christian09

What about catching an early morning or late night flight to Montreal? Other than that, I was going to suggest splitting the weddings and you asking if you can bring someone other than your husband who can help you, like a parent or a sibling.

tidetravel

The two of you made the commitment to your friend first.  In addition, she is closer.  If you have to choose, I would go with your friend's wedding.Would it be possible for you and DH to go up for your friend's wedding, him stay with you overnight, and then he can get up early and drive to the other wedding, while you get a ride home with someone else?  I wouldn't try the 8 hour drive w/ an 18 month old w/ medical conditions.

dsouldiva

I agree with pp, you had committed to your friend's wedding first, it sounds pretty impossible to do both so unless you can work out a way for you each to go to your respective friend's wedding I think you will have to stick to that.I understand your husband will be upset but its just unfortunate that they have chosen a date you can't do.

ffmaid

Sounds like you and daughter are going to your friends wedding and DH is going to best friends wedding Perhaps you need to hire a helper to deal with drving and changing daughters colostomy bag Or you need to drive thru the night to arrive at the next venue

jeannigirl

That would be to much for your baby to handle. Unfortuntely you an FI will need to make that decision yourself. You could stay with baby and have mom come ago and help out and FI could go to friends wedding. You did already commit yourself to this wedding and they did ask first. I would just explain that you have already commited to another wedding several months back and due to your babies medical problems that would be to much for all of you, with the traveling that distance. I am sure that they can understand that and be mature about it. If not then they really aren't being considerate to you and your family.