cash bar

tiffanycarapinha

Is it tacky to serve beer and wine and have a cash bar? 

hmonkey

yes, and thank you for asking.

[Deleted User]

Ditto Stage. Just do beer and wine or have a totally open bar.

hmonkey

to clarify, the cash bar is tacky.  it's not tacky to serve just beer and wine, or even to serve just soda or just lemonade.  it is tacky to charge for drinks.

salt78

Why not just serve beer and wine and leave it at that?

aerinpegadrak

Is this at the sort of venue that will have a full bar regardless (like a restaurant or something), and you're just trying to figure out how much you're hosting?  That's the only time I wouldn't really think anything of a form of cash bar.If the beer and wine are free, people will only drink the beer and wine, unless they're super picky or have some sort of allergy or something.  It's kind of pointless to only charge for half the options.

tiffanycarapinha

We are doing the beer and wine for sure... the place we are having the reception offers open or cash bar.  The only reason we were considering it was because he has a very large family and a lot of them mentioned that they would pay for a drink if we werent having an open bar. They are big on rum but it isnt in our budget to pay for open bar so we are going with just beer/wine.  I will just tell them sorry, fill a flask.

aerinpegadrak

Hmm, that's trickier.  If so many of them have mentioned a willingness to pay for their drink of choice, then obviously they're not going to be offended.Perhaps you can have the cash bar available, but not advertise the fact?  You can just have a bar menu up that indicates which drinks are hosted, and nothing more.  If people choose to try to order something off-menu, I'm sure they would understand that the drink wouldn't be hosted.Etiquette is about making your guests feel comfortable and cared for.  If you know that your guests would be happier to have to pay for their rum than not to have the option at all, you should do your best to accommodate them.

tiffanycarapinha

Good advice, thank you   They sound like a bunch of pirates, huh? haha

amkdp101

I also think this issue is regional. I was just at a wedding a few weeks ago that was beer and wine and cash for anything else and no one thought a thing of it. We drank lots of wine and bought a couple of mixed drinks.Also, everyone knew the set up going in so people brought money. Pass it by word of mouth. I've had alot of guest asking me about the bar situation. So just let them know if they ask.

sbily2010

Someone else on another board (don't currently remember which one right now) did this. they hosted like only so many kind of beer and so many of wine and know one had a problem with it.

lindakee

We are having beer, wine and a signature drink! you could do a mojito for your guest that like rum. I will probably do a purple cosmo. (our venue said they would pre-make 250 for $4 dollars a piece) That way we can control the price. I will probably also have a cash bar because we are in our early 20's with lots of young guests. They will probably want the option of having different types of drinks and I think it would be rude if we told them.. no we have a closed bar. Atleast they have an option to drink their choice or my free menu.

Soon2b_Mrs.F

Ditto to the above post about doing a signature drink. There's a lot of people that are doing wine, beer, and one special drink. It's a good way to save money and still be classy. If you're saying the family is big on rum, you could pick a drink with that in it. I wouldn't do a cash bar, though. It is kind of tacky.

melissa_8_24

I'm agreeing that this is a regional issue. I live in Wisconsin and almost ALL wedding that I attend here have free beer and/or wine and then any other alcohol is cash. Having a 100% open bar is almost unheard of here. And since most reception halls are restaurants, or include a full-serve bar you pretty much have to go with one option or the other.