I got an invitation in the mail last night...

cwaggoner07

For a March 16 wedding.
Guess who got A-listed!!!!

Ha.

misssunshine17

Oh my gosh. When did they send save the dates? In 2010?

ETA: when do they want the response card back?

cwaggoner07

By Feb 1.

misssunshine17

Wow. 

cwaggoner07

I'm 100% sure there's an a-list and a b-list.
I can't even get into my feelings on this wedding/marriage.

KellyBrian2013

I wouldn't respond by the RSVP date just to be a snot... but that's just how I am. Haha

RWolff

My FSIL just sent out ther STDs for their October 2013 wedding. Well, rather for their 1st reception. They will most likely have their invites mailed in February, which is the same time I'm mailing ours for our May 2013 wedding. What is it with these people?

HobokensFury

It's a bit early. I got married March 17 and sent out my invites on Jan 2 nd last year with a FEB 17 RSVP date. There was no B list but I needed a count 3 weeks ahead of time so I could order favors and tell the florist how many centerpieces I was having.

fleab2oo3

Im getting married March 16, and have not even made my invitations yet. We are making our own and sending them out between mid and late January. 

mcda04

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:b23e6a04-fc1c-4ed9-9fd9-d73036239679">I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]For a March 16 wedding. Guess who got A-listed!!!! Ha.
Posted by cwaggoner07[/QUOTE]

I thought invitations were supposed to be sent 3 months in advance especially if you have OOT guests. You actually received it 2 1/2 months early so I don't think it's that bad.

I didn't use STD's so the 3 month mark was what i as aiming for but I ended up sending mine in July for our 9-29 wedding.

Last year, we received an invitation in Sept. for a December wedding. I didn't think anything of it.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:bcd3ac9d-f69a-4b21-a1a7-e112f6e38c1d">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to I got an invitation in the mail last night... : I thought invitations were supposed to be sent 3 months in advance especially if you have OOT guests. You actually received it 2 1/2 months early so I don't think it's that bad. I didn't use STD's so the 3 month mark was what i as aiming for but I ended up sending mine in July for our 9-29 wedding. Last year, we received an invitation in Sept. for a December wedding. I didn't think anything of it.
Posted by mcda04[/QUOTE]

At the most you can send invites out 2 months in advance.  Anything more then that is a bit ridiculous.  If you have OOT guests that will need to make travel arrangements you either give them a verbal STD or send them something in the mail to let them know that they are on the guest list and that you will be getting married on X day.

The thing about receiving invites so early is that people (like myself) tend to forget about them.  The only reason I remembered that I was invited to one wedding was because the bride posted on Facebook that the RSVPs were due in a week (yes, yes, I know) and to start sending them in if you hadn't already.

mcda04

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:e6c0c04b-e1fd-42f8-8b44-5fa7ed4de1d8">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night... : You thought wrong.  Invitations go out 6-8 weeks prior to the event. OP received the invitation almost 13 weeks prior to the event. I would probably lose the invitation long before I even got a chance to RSVP since I have no idea what my plans might be in March right now.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

Thanks for pointing that out. I always thought 3 months was a bit early because I lose an invite or forget when I receive it this early so I didn't send mine out, but I thought *I* was the one who was wrong.

I was just under this 3 month assumption because I used TK's checklist and this notes invites go out 3 months before. TK is wrong i guess. What's new.

cwaggoner07

Yeah, 13 week invitation, and the RSVP 6 weeks before...
I know it's tiered. And other horrendous things etiquette-wise about this wedding.
And what kills me is that I'm fairly certain they are having a 30k plus wedding. Money can't buy etiquette y'all.

cwaggoner07

The RSVP date was sent with an insert, not on the invitation itself.

ETA: I realize I'm being gripey and crabby and judgey, I just hate all this because I very much dislike the groom and I know this is all probably his doing. Because he's a controlling a$$hat like that.

gurrlballa10

We got an invitation this past year for a mid October wedding, at the end of June.  6 week RSVP deadline.  8 hour reception and their entire registry was composed of gift cards.  They also didn't invite my H.

I wish I could make this ish up. 

MeeJay22

Okay, so they sent it early. What is confusing me is how it's bad etiquette because you would lose the invitation. If you know you are the type to lose it, why wouldn't you RSVP promptly?

cwaggoner07

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:2a32735c-1e45-40e9-a18f-c3467e2c41a4">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]Okay, so they sent it early. What is confusing me is how it's bad etiquette because you would lose the invitation. If you know you are the type to lose it, why wouldn't you RSVP promptly?
Posted by MeeJay22[/QUOTE]

It's not bad etiquette to simply send an invite early. It's bad etiquette to send your invitation early and have an early rsvp date so that you can send out a second round of invitations based on your rsvp responses.

MeeJay22

Well, If I had a wedding invitation, I'd open up my planner and be writing "Wedding" on that day...

MeeJay22

          In those situations, I would call the Bride and explain the situation and send a gift.
        
         If I didn't even like the groom I'd probably RSVP not attending and not write snarky comments about them on the internet...

cwaggoner07

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:775f4d45-21a3-4840-af42-1c8a35cb29a4">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]          In those situations, I would call the Bride and explain the situation and send a gift.                   If I didn't even like the groom I'd probably RSVP not attending and not write snarky comments about them on the internet...
Posted by MeeJay22[/QUOTE]

Just go away.

AdeleDazeem

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:775f4d45-21a3-4840-af42-1c8a35cb29a4">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]          In those situations, I would call the Bride and explain the situation and send a gift.                
Posted by MeeJay22[/QUOTE]

And hopefully the bride would think "Whoops!  Sent the invitations a bit too early for people, I guess!" 

And then we're back where we started - send invitations 6 - 8 weeks before the event.

Ah, full circle.

cwaggoner07

Also I can't send a gift because in lieu of a registry they are pointing their guests to a charity.
Just let me vent.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:85146681-c804-4df3-9fb0-eefe00793168">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]Also I can't send a gift because in lieu of a registry they are pointing their guests to a charity. Just let me vent.
Posted by cwaggoner07[/QUOTE]

I would send them the ugliest vase you could find and then the next time you stopped by their house make sure to ask where they put the "lovely" vase you gave them.

This couple sounds peachy keen!

Miss Esa

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:9a13955f-1186-402d-af63-6ccbd05d52cb">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE] To your second part STFU.  Swag is a reg here.  She brought this to us because she was annoyed and knew we would probably be able to relate on some level.  This is a wedding forum.  We bicth about weddings here.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]
This is a public forum, you can't force MeeJay or anyone else to stop posting or to 'go away.'
You are both entitled to your opinions. So what if they aren't the same.



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allychase

Wait wait wait. So you all tell people they can't dictate the responses they get on a public forum but tell them to go away when you don't like the response you get? Hypocrites, party of you.

cwaggoner07

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:23373041-e31e-4569-bba7-95ed50d900df">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night... : I'd make a donation to the local swingers' ball in their name.  
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

You mean in addition to my monthly pledge I send anyways? That's good... I can save a stamp.

cwaggoner07

So I tried to find a GIF from the movie Swingers (like a moron) to lighten the mood and now if my internet browser history ever pops up I will probably get fired and
 DEAR EVERYONE: NEVER GOOGLE 'SWINGER GIFS' YOU WILL WANT TO BURN YOUR EYES.

cwaggoner07

Oh and Linger - I will not pound Smokie's muffin but I will totally fist bump it. Thx.

MeeJay22

[QUOTE] : It's rude to tell someone you will attend their party and then change your mind.  I wouldn't allow the bride and groom to make me the bad guy because they were overly excited to get their invitations out. Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

      If there were legitimate circumstances nobody with any grace would turn you into "the bad guy".
      It is extremely amusing how pissed you all are that other people have bad wedding manners given how little understanding and compassion you show. When I use the word amusing I mean it's annoying as hell.
 Aren't you all married already? This board was actually designed for future brides to get advice and swap ideas so I could care less that you are regular poster and I am just a newbie.

MeeJay22

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_i-got-an-invitation-in-the-mail-last-night?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1f97b2f3-2d59-499a-ad03-6e4957731bd8Post:d67e614e-de4e-4267-90cf-2be7f6e8bbc5">Re: I got an invitation in the mail last night...</a>:
[QUOTE]So I tried to find a GIF from the movie Swingers (like a moron) to lighten the mood and now if my internet browser history ever pops up I will probably get fired and  DEAR EVERYONE: NEVER GOOGLE 'SWINGER GIFS' YOU WILL WANT TO BURN YOUR EYES.
Posted by cwaggoner07[/QUOTE]

LOL, that is pretty funny and probably something I would accidently do!

erinlin25

I have to have a 6 week response date because our venue needs a meal count 30 days in advance; we plan on doing 6 week rsvp date so we will have time to track down people who do not meet the deadline.  I luckily can add/subtract people up to 2 weeks prior.  I do think 3 months+ early is a bit early for the actual invitation though!