Mother-in-Law

court476

A few months ago my mother in law and i were talking about the wedding and she told me she was going to wear this: http://www.victoriantradingco.com/store/catalogimages/1a/i1585618.html

I told her that that would be fine, because it was very pretty and I didn't see a problem with it. Now a few months later stepping back and looking at the wedding i see both of our families (with the exception of my mom and her, the whole family is in the wedding) which means that they will be the only ones that don't match, which is fine, but my moms is going to match the bridal party. So my mother in law is going to wear this blue outfit and stick out like a sore thumb. 

My mother in law hasn't bought the dress yet, should I ask her to match us or should I let her wear it since I told her a few months ago she could? 

rajahmd

Just let her wear what she wants.  The moms don't have to match.  You really only get a say in what the wedding party wears, not the parents.  In the end, it won't really matter if she sticks out or not.  The pictures will look nice just the same. 

catloverd

I would just let her decide. Let her know that everyone else is going to match, but her dress doesn't quite match, but if that's okay with her, then let her wear it. Likely, she'll opt for something else. 

From personal experience, I told my mom that everyone in the party is wearing colors fitting our theme. She had two dresses to choose from, one is blue, which fits our theme, and the other is purple, not fitting at all. I just told her she'd stick out like a sore thumb if she wore the purple dress since everyone else was matching and she decided to go with the blue one.

MyNameIsNot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_mother-in-law?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:4eee6339-4810-4352-893b-432814cddea3Post:0da0fd1f-6fef-4dc6-b75c-2803b324c576">Mother-in-Law</a>:
[QUOTE]A few months ago my mother in law and i were talking about the wedding and she told me she was going to wear this: <a href="http://www.victoriantradingco.com/store/catalogimages/1a/i1585618.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.victoriantradingco.com/store/catalogimages/1a/i1585618.html</a> I told her that that would be fine, because it was very pretty and I didn't see a problem with it. Now a few months later stepping back and looking at the wedding i see both of our families (with the exception of my mom and her, the whole family is in the wedding) which means that they will be the only ones that don't match, which is fine, but my moms is going to match the bridal party. So my mother in law is going to wear this blue outfit and stick out like a sore thumb.  My mother in law hasn't bought the dress yet, should I ask her to match us or should I let her wear it since I told her a few months ago she could? 
Posted by court476[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Keep your mouth shut.  You have no say over what the mothers wear, unless they are bridesmaids.  </div><div>
The idea that they should match the bridesmaids is silly.  

</div>

lyndausvi

Honestly, I would give her a heads up.   And not because I think she should change her dress, but she might show up and be "wtf, why am I the only one not wearing 'x' color?".     Basically give a heads up, but make sure you tell her she is more than willing to wear the dress she picked out.   Make it her choice, not yours.  

If it was me I would want to know.

  (which, btw I  think the dress she picked out is a beautiful)

kmmssg

I'm with Lynda here.  I would just show her a pic of your mom's dress so she has a heads up.  Don't say anything about having her get something new, but I think Lynda is right that she might have a WTH moment and you should find a quiet way to give her a heads up.

ZeroOrchestra

Honestly, we do not have any pics of our parents with the entire wedding party. I would give her a heads up as PP suggested, but only for her own comfort. Leave it up to her, they don't have to match.

cwaggoner07

I agree with giving her a heads up, but more for HER benefit, not yours.

mrsbiss2be

I agree with pp's....maybe casually bring it up, but I would say let her wear what she wants. If she's up for matching, help her find a dress that looks similar to the dress she chose.
It's a very beautiful dress imo.

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_mother-in-law?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:4eee6339-4810-4352-893b-432814cddea3Post:c229a759-b7a9-48b3-baed-28fc161817cc">Re: Mother-in-Law</a>:
[QUOTE]Honestly, I would give her a heads up.   And not because I think she should change her dress, but she might show up and be "wtf, why am I the only one not wearing 'x' color?".     Basically give a heads up, but make sure you tell her she is more than willing to wear the dress she picked out.   Make it her choice, not yours.   If it was me I would want to know.   (which, btw I  think the dress she picked out is a beautiful)
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

I agree with lynda.  I could be be embarassed in this case so I would want to know