Hyphen the names

mrscllb

I want to hyphen my last name (first marriage) with my fiances name when we get married because i have children with my first husband. I grew up with a my dad's surname and mom went back to her maiden name and i hated explaining it to everyone why we didn't have the same last name. My fiance is having issues not with the hyphen but with his name being last. it is proper to add the new name to the end. I explained to him "best for last" and he still isn't a fan of the idea.
how does one deal with making the name change a positive one and hyphened?

lyndausvi

I've mostly seen the husband's name last.   

I added DH's last name to mine (no hyphen official, but some companies do anyway).   More often than not people get rid of mine than his. So being last is not a "bad" thing.

misssunshine17

If I was your FI, I wouldn't want to 'share' with your ex but that's just me. Why not just keep your maiden name? I think it's a highly personal choice.

kaos16

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_hyphen-the-names?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:54aca2a1-da36-44be-a119-88bf6560161ePost:7518f1eb-11e7-44e8-b243-330372de9ad0">Hyphen the names</a>:
[QUOTE]I want to hyphen my last name (first marriage) with my fiances name when we get married because i have children with my first husband. I grew up with a my dad's surname and mom went back to her maiden name and i hated explaining it to everyone why we didn't have the same last name. My fiance is having issues not with the hyphen but with his name being last. it is proper to add the new name to the end. I explained to him "best for last" and he still isn't a fan of the idea. how does one deal with making the name change a positive one and hyphened?
Posted by mrscllb[/QUOTE]

Certainly it;s your choice what to do with your name, but I do want to point out that in thisday and age there are plenty of blended families and people who have different last names than their spouse, child, etc.  I'm not sure that your children or future children would have too much explaining to do to anyone. (Not that it's anyone's business why your name is different anyway!!!)

AddieCake

I have only seen the husband's name last. To me, the hyphenated names indicate which is the maiden and which is the married name, and I think MOST people do it/have seen it with maiden first. Does your husband want to appear that HIS name is your maiden name as opposed to it being your "new" last name?  Because that's how it would look to me. 

misssunshine17

Oops, Stage, you caught my reading fail. OP, ignore me

Jessa617

My FMIL had her first husband's name hyphenated with her second husband because of your reasoning (kids). Once the kids were adults and out of school she changed it to just her second husband's last name and dropped her ex's.

You could do something temporary like that.

MoxieMickie