Guest List from hell...

BethMarie63

I recently just started a new job at a salon that I love. I'm just kicking off my cosmetology career and I absolutely LOVE the people that I work with. Two of the stylists I work with are doing hair for myself and my wedding party, and one of the other stylists will be doing make up. Since working there, I've added them to the guest list (obviously). I've also added a couple of the other staff members that I've gotten pretty close with over the last 6 months.

We're contracted at our venue for 175 people, right now our guest list count is at 215. The venue can hold up to 200 people, so we can still up the number we're contracted for if we need to. 75% of the guest list   is family. My FI is one of 4 boys, his dad is one of 6 and his mom is one of 8. My dad is also one of 6 and has half brothers and sisters as well. We both have HUGE families that are very close knit, I couldn't see hacking off family members from the list.

The other day after adding to the guest list, I called my mom to tell her I found people to do hair and make up for the wedding and that I was adding them to the guest list as well. Her response...."I have friends, too!"  I felt like I was on the phone with a 14 year old... There's people on our guest list that I don't even know because she's invited them. I don't think I should have to take off people that I personally want to be at my wedding so that HER friends can be there. For the record, my parents as well as my FI and I are paying for our wedding.

So frustrating! Sorry for the rant...I just needed to vent! Is my mom being ridiculous? Or am I just over reacting?

Pirata13

Who is paying?

If your mom is paying for the wedding, she does have a say. You might need to sit down and go over all of your guest list and see where cuts can be made all around. My parents paid for much of the wedding, we made sure all of their friends they wanted included were, but H & I did make several cuts of our own. Not even to accomodate parents' friends or additional guests, just that when we sat down and looked at things, we realized some we added in the excitement of it all and that we could make cuts to make everything more affordable.

ChrislovesBarry

I would limit the number of people your parent's are inviting.  Even though my parents weren't going to invite their friends, I thought it was only fair since they are paying for the majority.  I told them 5 couples.

In regards to work, I'd limit it to people that you only socialize with afterwork.  That you have gone out with them for a NON-work related dinner or something.

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_guest-list-hell?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:802acecd-5d6c-4e66-863d-ac215b86a707Post:8e8b8606-8459-4e32-a12b-c516e50ec38b">Guest List from hell...</a>:
[QUOTE]I recently just started a new job at a salon that I love. I'm just kicking off my cosmetology career and I absolutely LOVE the people that I work with. Two of the stylists I work with are doing hair for myself and my wedding party, and one of the other stylists will be doing make up. Since working there, I've added them to the guest list (obviously). I've also added a couple of the other staff members that I've gotten pretty close with over the last 6 months. We're contracted at our venue for 175 people, right now our guest list count is at 215. The venue can hold up to 200 people, so we can still up the number we're contracted for if we need to. 75% of the guest list   is family. My FI is one of 4 boys, his dad is one of 6 and his mom is one of 8. My dad is also one of 6 and has half brothers and sisters as well. We both have HUGE families that are very close knit, I couldn't see hacking off family members from the list. The other day after adding to the guest list, I called my mom to tell her I found people to do hair and make up for the wedding and that I was adding them to the guest list as well. Her response...."I have friends, too!"  I felt like I was on the phone with a 14 year old... There's people on our guest list that I don't even know because she's invited them. I don't think I should have to take off people that I personally want to be at my wedding so that HER friends can be there. For the record, my parents as well as my FI and I are paying for our wedding. So frustrating! Sorry for the rant...I just needed to vent! Is my mom being ridiculous? Or am I just over reacting?
Posted by BethMarie63[/QUOTE]

SarahPLiz

Your problem is that you kept inviting people when you knew you were over capacity. That is your fault. Just because you have someone do makeup and hair doesn't mean they have to be invited. 

ChanelShades

Yeah you don't have to put people who did your hair and makeup on the list. Tell your mom if she needs certain people to come then she needs to pay for them because you are WELL over your limit. 

redheadfsu

You are over on your guest list. Do not add, you need to cut. (if invites haven't gone out yet)

Why do you have over your contract number? Or especially over what the venue can hold? I see huge problems ahead.

soontobeschooley

I only invited the people who I would be disappointed if they did not come.  As far as co-workers, I have 2 and they are the people I am friends with OUTSIDE of work.

LauraT25

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_guest-list-hell?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:802acecd-5d6c-4e66-863d-ac215b86a707Post:92b2de97-3bde-4e85-beae-4e82e18a46ca">Re: Guest List from hell...</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I only invited the people who I would be disappointed if they did not come</strong>.  As far as co-workers, I have 2 and they are the people I am friends with OUTSIDE of work.
Posted by soontobeschooley[/QUOTE]

This was our general outlook when making the guest list,with a few family members as exceptions.  If your parents are paying, let your mom invite a couple of friends if it will avoid some major drama.   But as PPs have said, you need to get your guest list at least below the max capacity of your venue, and you don't have to invite your hair and makeup people.

BTW, I'm pretty sure I know where you're getting married, and every 5 people you add over your contracted amount is another $750 to your venue - not including extra favors, centerpieces, etc.  So be prepared for the sticker shock.  Maybe that will provide the incentive to make the necessary cuts.