IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?

iloveguero09

WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 2 YRS IN SEPTEMBER AND I WAS WONDERING SHOULD I GET UPSET WHEN HE LEAVES WITH HIS FRIEND WITH A LITTLE BIT?? 
AND I KINDA HAVE AN ATTITUDE ISSUE GOING ON AND IM REALLY TRYING TO GET BETTER CAN ANYONE GIVE ME ANY TIPS ON LOSSING UP A LITTLE BIT!?

bluegrassbride11

Hate to hear that.. Hang in there. My FI and I are both very young, but I have a strong will and a jealous heart when it comes to me vs his friends. Let him have his space for now. Discuss that you don't like it so well before you get married.

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:2a790638-289e-49a8-8296-f46a4ee4399d">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Hate to hear that.. Hang in there. My FI and I are both very young, but I have a strong will and a jealous heart when it comes to me vs his friends. Let him have his space for now. Discuss that you don't like it so well before you get married.
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
YEA!! ME AND MINE ARE YOUNG TOO!! SO I SHOULD REALLY JUST GIVE HIM SOME SPACE!!??

bluegrassbride11

If I were you, I would definitely address it with him first. Tell him your concerns and frustrations, and tell him you want to be with him more!

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:327c4450-258b-4ee1-828a-012b51161635">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]If I were you, I would definitely address it with him first. Tell him your concerns and frustrations, and tell him you want to be with him more!
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
WELL I CANT LIE HE IS WITH ME THE MAJORITY OF THE TIME IDK I JUST FOR SOME REASON ITS JUST A REACTION!! AND I KNOW I SHOLDNT BE ALL LIKE THAT HE CANT BE WITH HIS FRIEND YOU KNOW?? I JUST WANT TO STOP BEING THAT WAY!

bluegrassbride11

Yeah, I'm sure it's frustrating. Maybe just try to find something to keep you occupied!

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:15004b65-dfd6-42d0-b7f6-124ece079b25">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah, I'm sure it's frustrating. Maybe just try to find something to keep you occupied!
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
yeahh! thats wat he tells me to do he tells go with your friends im just stuborn i dunt like to :)

bluegrassbride11

Haha, well hang out on here. That's what I do. My FI is out of town, and we don't live together..makes things tough.

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:f3a3a31f-4b3c-40c1-a429-72e835110cf5">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Haha, well hang out on here. That's what I do. My FI is out of town, and we don't live together..makes things tough.
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
WELL ME AND MINE LIVE TOGETHER!! NOW IM STARTIN TO THINK ITS SILLY TO GET MAD IDK ITS WAS ALWAYS JUST A REACTION THOUGH!

blahblah85

Remember that he is a person, and you don't own him. 

I sometimes geet frustrateed when my FI is gone long periods.  Its because I am so bored.  Find something to do that occupies your time.

And you might want to kill the caps.  People read all caps as yelling.

bluegrassbride11

Yeah, my FI has already been gone 4 months of this year, and will be gone another 2 before the wedding. It gets a little frustrating, but that's his job. Be thankful!

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:2bed294c-b503-44bc-b38c-4e0c4dc5c84c">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Remember that he is a person, and you don't own him.  I sometimes geet frustrateed when my FI is gone long periods.  Its because I am so bored.   Find something to do that occupies your time. And you might want to kill the caps.  People read all caps as yelling.
Posted by blahblah85[/QUOTE/]<span style="white-space:pre;" class="Apple-tab-span"> </span>
<div>oh sorry :) i think thats the reason i get fustrated because of the amount of time he is gone! </div>

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:e39e41cb-b1bb-4077-bb02-6639681d42ac">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah, my FI has already been gone 4 months of this year, and will be gone another 2 before the wedding. It gets a little frustrating, but that's his job. Be thankful!
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
yea your right :) thank you it really helpeed just talking about it to some one!

BunnyChii

First of all, caps lock is not needed. Seriously, it's giving me a headache.

Secondly, you're only 18. I won't try to talk you out of making a commitment so young, but you definitely should not isolate yourself from friends and spend ALL your time together. It's not healthy to spend time with each other 24/7 no matter what your age/relationship status.

Unless he's leaving you alone every single night, no, you should not be upset with him. Find something else to do while he's gone - get a hobby or hang out with your own friends. I've been with my FI since I was 15 and can honestly tell you that when he was away at college and we only saw each other every couple weeks was the greatest time of growth in our relationship. We realized that we both had to have our own life before we could have one together. Make sure you two don't end up relying on each other for all of your emotional support. That's not healthy.

Good luck.

blahblah85

I totally get it.  When he leaves use the time to go see your friends!  I know a lot of my friends have been neglected since I moved in with my FI.  I try to make time for them, and what better time then when he is away with his friends?

bluegrassbride11

Well good. I love this place, it's really good for that!

blahblah85

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:dc1361c9-ebc3-4903-980a-b14124f43cc8">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]First of all, caps lock is not needed. Seriously, it's giving me a headache. Secondly, you're only 18. I won't try to talk you out of making a commitment so young, but you definitely should not isolate yourself from friends and spend ALL your time together. It's not healthy to spend time with each other 24/7 no matter what your age/relationship status. Unless he's leaving you alone every single night , no, you should not be upset with him. Find something else to do while he's gone - get a hobby or hang out with your own friends. I've been with my FI since I was 15 and can honestly tell you that when he was away at college and we only saw each other every couple weeks was the greatest time of growth in our relationship. We realized that we both had to have our own life before we could have one together. Make sure you two don't end up relying on each other for all of your emotional support. That's not healthy. Good luck.
Posted by BunnyChii[/QUOTE]


This.  :)

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:dc1361c9-ebc3-4903-980a-b14124f43cc8">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]First of all, caps lock is not needed. Seriously, it's giving me a headache. Secondly, you're only 18. I won't try to talk you out of making a commitment so young, but you definitely should not isolate yourself from friends and spend ALL your time together. It's not healthy to spend time with each other 24/7 no matter what your age/relationship status. Unless he's leaving you alone every single night , no, you should not be upset with him. Find something else to do while he's gone - get a hobby or hang out with your own friends. I've been with my FI since I was 15 and can honestly tell you that when he was away at college and we only saw each other every couple weeks was the greatest time of growth in our relationship. We realized that we both had to have our own life before we could have one together. Make sure you two don't end up relying on each other for all of your emotional support. That's not healthy. Good luck.
Posted by BunnyChii[/QUOTE]
thank you and im sorry about the caps im just used to typing that way:)

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:3adc9436-6c14-4c08-96bf-cce28557c5f0">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]I totally get it.  When he leaves use the time to go see your friends!  I know a lot of my friends have been neglected since I moved in with my FI.  I try to make time for them, and what better time then when he is away with his friends?
Posted by blahblah85[/QUOTE]
yea that true!

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:17f52aca-5a78-4d8d-b31c-f76e742d5f00">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Well good. I love this place, it's really good for that!
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
yea this is the site ima start comming to lol

bluegrassbride11

Good! I'm a local in the random chat posts lol.

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:2eb1727e-95d3-4896-9763-8754bd9757b6">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Good! I'm a local in the random chat posts lol.
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
lol and what do you talk about?

bluegrassbride11

Randomness Look for the "Saturday night" posts.

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:4e45154d-b3d4-4412-a4eb-a87b31baf4fe">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Randomness :) Look for the "Saturday night" posts.
Posted by bluegrassbride11[/QUOTE]
OK HOLD ON :)

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:ab663329-10e7-4880-8c5b-c01e3bd297f1">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES? : OK HOLD ON :)
Posted by iloveguero09[/QUOTE]
i looked and i posted :)

mstar284

Just THE SUBJECT ALONE MAKES ME THINK YOU ARE "IMATURE"

Although I'm sure you knew it was really "immature" and why is everything in all caps? And why are you being controlling? It's one thing to miss someone you care about when they leave, but to be angry? Now it depends. If my FI said, I'm going to be out of town for a couple of weeks for business. Oh by the way, I have a hotel room with a female co-worker...then yah...I'd be angry. But come one. Just chill out please. He's going out of town with a friend. Many of us have FIs going out of town with their group of friends for their B-parties. Sure we will miss them, but certainly not feel angry.

iloveguero09

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:357c0248-3ba7-43de-813d-9c022013d7b7">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Just THE SUBJECT ALONE MAKES ME THINK YOU ARE "IMATURE" Although I'm sure you knew it was really "immature" and why is everything in all caps? And why are you being controlling? It's one thing to miss someone you care about when they leave, but to be angry? Now it depends. If my FI said, I'm going to be out of town for a couple of weeks for business. Oh by the way, I have a hotel room with a female co-worker...then yah...I'd be angry. But come one. Just chill out please. He's going out of town with a friend. Many of us have FIs going out of town with their group of friends for their B-parties. Sure we will miss them, but certainly not feel angry.
Posted by mstar284[/QUOTE]
yea i know thank you for your advice i DO feel silly for being angry!<div>thank you!</div>

hellerc1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:357c0248-3ba7-43de-813d-9c022013d7b7">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]Just THE SUBJECT ALONE MAKES ME THINK YOU ARE "IMATURE" Although I'm sure you knew it was really "immature" and why is everything in all caps? And why are you being controlling? It's one thing to miss someone you care about when they leave, but to be angry? Now it depends. If my FI said, I'm going to be out of town for a couple of weeks for business. Oh by the way, I have a hotel room with a female co-worker...then yah...I'd be angry. But come one. Just chill out please. He's going out of town with a friend. Many of us have FIs going out of town with their group of friends for their B-parties. Sure we will miss them, but certainly not feel angry.
Posted by mstar284[/QUOTE]

This. Also has he done something to you that would warrant you to be nervous or not trust him when he goes out with his friends? I suggest trying to find a hobby or make plans to go out with your friends.

hellerc1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:2a6e7cbb-8a9b-453f-8916-18399bb904aa">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES? : What is 'ima'?
Posted by LucyHC[/QUOTE]

from google it's 'I am going to'

mstar284

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:8324051f-1ca9-491e-b3c6-6c4bf45d984e">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES? : Wow.  I wouldn't have gotten 'I am going to' from 'ima'.  Thanks for bringing me up to speed.
Posted by LucyHC[/QUOTE]

Like ima go to the mall

Ima to me always meant i'm gonna...although I've never actually used it neither verbally nor in written form

Beazilla

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_imature-mad-boyfriend-leaves?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:adc6551b-8cb9-4eb4-b92b-f563a4337f8dPost:434322b2-c549-4343-8797-654beca1da67">Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: IS IT IMATURE IF I GET MAD AT MY BOYFRIEND WHEN HE LEAVES? : Like ima go to the mall Ima to me always meant i'm gonna...although I've never actually used it neither verbally nor in written form
Posted by mstar284[/QUOTE]
That's what it is.

OP, both you and your boyfriend need to have separate lives in addition to your life together. It's very hard to be enough people for the other person and you both need to have time with your friends and to do the things you like to do. I've been with FI for almost 6 years and we've been LDR for 4 years. If one of us got mad everytime I left to go back to school, our relationship never would've survived. You have to trust each other and enjoy not only your time together, but your time apart.