Name on invite

OwningAHome1981

I hate my real name! I go by a nickname and I have been called this name all my life. No one knows me as my real name except my parents but they never call me it. It is on 2 things- my birth certificate and drivers license (which I am changing when I change my last name).

My parents want me to use my real name on the invites. I told them I am not using my real name but b/c I am not using my real name, my nickname sounds funny with my middle name... so I am thinking of scrapping the middle name altogether. That means that FI should probably scrap his too (which he is fine with)... I'm just not sure how this would be worded and would it be weird to not have a middle name on the invites?

Also, what is the proper wording for the invite if FI's parents are divirced and re-married- do we still say "son of ____ and ______" even though they don'r speak to eachother, they are still his parents. I just didn't know if it would be weird to list their names together since they are no longer together.

Thoughts?

Maggie0829

For the first part.  I have always gone by my nickname.  For our invites I only used our first name (my nickname) and last names.  No middle name included.

As for your second part, are both parents hosting the event?  If so you can simply put "Together with their parents, Ms. OwningAHome and Mr. OwningAHome..."

But if you really want to list them then I believe that since they are remarried you should list their spouses names as well.  But I could be wrong here.

OwningAHome1981

My parents are hosting.

I guess we were thinking something like this "Mr & Mrs Dad&Mom invite you to the wedding of their daughter, Owningahome to Fiance, son of ______" and then is where I got stuck b/c I'm not sure how to list his parents.

courtski2004

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_name-on-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:c08d9789-5dd9-4120-aa7a-2c2db9ab5cd7Post:0a3f6ee9-9c45-47c7-a247-b2663fdc2c19">Re: Name on invite</a>:
[QUOTE]My parents are hosting. I guess we were thinking something like this "Mr & Mrs Dad&Mom invite you to the wedding of their daughter, Owningahome to Fiance, son of ______" and then is where I got stuck b/c I'm not sure how to list his parents.
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

If your parents are hosting, there is no need to list his parent's names IMO.

Maggie0829

I am always in the "only those hosting should have their names listed" group.

HobokensFury

Just remember your ML will have your legal first name so it may not be so easy to change it at the time of your marriage. In NJ you need a court order to change your first name.

Avion22

You are over-thinking the name thing.  The invitation doesn't have to list your full legal name.  Put the name you "go by" and that people will recognize.  You can omit your middle name and leave his, or you can both skip middle names.  It's NBD.   

Sassenach1743

I don't have a middle name and neither does my fiance. And to make it a little more confusing, FI has two first names (John David) that he goes by. So it may look like he has a middle name listed on the invitation but everyone we know is aware that his first name is John David and that he has no middle name. 

It's no biggie! Put the name you like (and go by) on your invitation. The marriage license is another story though... Hoboken is right, your legal name must be on your marriage license and depending on where you live, the court will dictate how you can change it. 

As for the groom's parents names on the invitation. If they are not hosting then they should not be listed on the invitation. If they are hosting then their names should appear on separate lines without the word "and" connecting them. I believe, according to etiquette, the word "and" is used when indicating a married couple.

MyNameIsNot

I would put your real name on the invitation.  It's your formal name, and it's a formal invitation.  

For his parents, you could do:

Groom

Son of

Ms. Mother in Law

Mr. Father in Law

Don't put them on the same line or join them with "and" if they aren't married anymore.  While it isn't traditional, it's perfectly fine to include the non-hosting parents by name if you like.  

OwningAHome1981

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_name-on-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:c08d9789-5dd9-4120-aa7a-2c2db9ab5cd7Post:0eea0220-d80b-4c77-be0c-f0e241b65986">Re: Name on invite</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I would put your real name on the invitation.  It's your formal name, and it's a formal invitation.</strong>   For his parents, you could do: Groom Son of Ms. Mother in Law Mr. Father in Law Don't put them on the same line or join them with "and" if they aren't married anymore.  While it isn't traditional, it's perfectly fine to include the non-hosting parents by name if you like.  
Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

yes but no one knows me by that name... honestly ppl would be like who is this person b/c the real name and nickname are not similar at all, lol. It would confuse a lot of people b/c we are inviting a lot of people who are like 3rd and 4th cousins that have never even met me (my parents want them there).

We also want to include his parents names on the invite even though they are not hosting.

Sassenach1743

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_name-on-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:c08d9789-5dd9-4120-aa7a-2c2db9ab5cd7Post:a108be8c-ba7c-41ef-bf0e-7baf7388061a">Re: Name on invite</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Name on invite : yes but no one knows me by that name... honestly ppl would be like who is this person b/c the real name and nickname are not similar at all, lol. It would confuse a lot of people b/c we are inviting a lot of people who are like 3rd and 4th cousins that have never even met me (my parents want them there). <strong>We also want to include his parents names on the invite even though they are not hosting.</strong>
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

<div>Why not just use the following then?</div><div>
</div><div>Together with their families, </div><div>Bride and Groom</div><div>request the pleasure of your company...</div>

OwningAHome1981

In Response to Re:Name on invite:[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Name on invite:In Response to Re: Name on invite : yes but no one knows me by that name... honestly ppl would be like who is this person b/c the real name and nickname are not similar at all, lol. It would confuse a lot of people b/c we are inviting a lot of people who are like 3rd and 4th cousins that have never even met me my parents want them there. We also want to include his parents names on the invite even though they are not hosting.Posted by OwningAHome1981Why not just use the following then?Together with their families,nbsp;Bride and Groomrequest the pleasure of your company... Posted by brita722[/QUOTE]

Yeah but we want to mention all the parents names. I guess 2 seperate lines for his parents rather than ampersand in between... Since they are not together anymore.

Thank you!