Okay, so don't get me wrong-I love my mom, she's the best and always there for me when I need something. But when it comes to the wedding planning, we're not on the same page.
My fiance and I are paying entirely for the wedding, we want to. We wanted to for a few reasons a) it makes it better in the end in our opinion, b) we need to learn how to live on a budget and this will help us and c) we want our wedding day to be what WE have dreamed of.
So naturally, I'm having problems with the last one. My mom has been criticizing every idea I've come up with so far. For example, the fiance and I both have 6 attendants each, we're not having a huge wedding (about 200), but we wanted that many people up there with us because there are honestly 6 people that we really want to be up there with us on the wedding day. So my mom got upset because she thinks that by having 6 attendants, that automatically means you have to have a huge wedding, she says it's too many.
Then I told her how we were thinking of getting some jellybeans in the colors of the wedding as favors. "Do you really need to give out favors?" My response was no, we don't. But we want to, it's tradition and it's a thank you to the guests for being there with us to celebrate. And we have allotted for favors in the budget. "Not a lot of people like jellybeans." Even so, it's a favor, it's something we can afford and its an idea that we really like.
Then we began constructing a guest list, I read off some of the people from her side of the family that we wanted to invite and she would say "No, they don't need to come, we're not inviting 3rd cousins." and "Why are you inviting them?"
So my problem is is that every time I try to tell her that I appreciate her opinion but we have something else in mind, she gets offended, she begins to tell me that our wedding day is not just about us....etc. I don't know how to approach her on this, but if I'm planning and paying for my own wedding, I want it to be MY wedding, the wedding I've been dreaming of. Not someone else's opinions and suggestions...
What do I do?