Having such a hard time with BM dresses :( vent, sorry!

zeke17us

So I posted this on the June 2012 board but thought I'd be better putting it over here, maybe someone else has been in my shoes?!

I had no idea that this would be the one thing I'd be stressing the most about I thought I had it in the bag early on but it wasnt so. Now I am feeling frantic trying to find something in the color I love. That is proving to be a huge issue. 

I was just going to let all my girls pick a short dress with straps of some sort in a neutral color but they all kept coming back to me with... what should we do and, what do you want and .. gaaa!!!! I dindt think it would be that hard, but clearly it is and I think its because of the color?!

My colors will be hydrangea green, chocolate brown and burlap. I was going to do chocolate brown BM dresses or green which would be so much easier but I dont like the look of either.  

I love the look of neutrals much better so my vision is something in the "burlapy" family but that is sooo hard!!

And I keep toying with the fabric too, organza or taffeta?!?!  can we mix fabrics?!?

And to make matters worse I keep looking back at my dress to get the whole vision, (would these look good with mine?!) and its making me reconsider mine jlksjdbfliusbdfliu

I am the most easy going person which is why I wanted to let them just run with but clearly that was easier said than done

Grrr I dont know what I'm looking for positng this here but I needed to get it out, sorry for the vent but I am so stressed over this for some reason, I feel like it is a huge part of the "look" of the wedding especially when I'll have 8 girls, Im just freaking out a little!!!

meganb1977

I hear ya, I had some trouble with this too from some of my bridesmaids that even a color and length wasn't enough guidance for them!  There are people who are still "old school" and are used to the bride picking a dress and tell them what to wear for the wedding.

It's totally okay to do different fabrics if that's what you want and you'd like to allow for more options.

Perhaps you could browse the internet and get a few pictures of dresses to show them what you have in mind.  Or as long as the price range would be within everyone's budget perhaps you could narrow it down for them by specifying a color say at David's Bridal or from Alfred Angelo and tell them anything knee length with shoulder straps is fine and suggest a few styles for them to try on.

LoveMuffins

I went with all my girls when they went BM dress shopping. I told them the color and the length and they were sooooo frustrated with me for not providing more guidelines! They kept asking me "What about this one? Is this one ok?" I'm like... do you like it? They just wanted to make sure I liked it.

Tbh, this is not a bad problem to have, since it just means they're really into making sure that you're happy and you're really into making sure that they're happy. If you can find the time, go with them. That way you can tell them they look beautiful and you love it as long as they're happy. If you don't have the time, then a few pictures of dresses that you like are probably the best way to go GL!

blgrout

I don't see why you can't mix fabrics.  My BM are. One is wearing satin and the other 2 are wearing chiffon.  It works when they stand together. 

I think if you pick a color at a big box store, like MeganB suggested, and give them a length and that you want straps, that should help narrow it down.

Or go shopping with them, if you can.

GL!

JennLax

Definitely try looking at the big names in bridesmaid dresses online first (David's, Dessy Group, etc.) and try to pick out a colour you like as an example.

I quickly checked Dessy and there's an option to search by neutral shades.  Two colours that seemed close to "Burlap" for me were:

Palomino:
http://www.dessy.com/dresses/bridesmaid/6634xx/?color=palomino&colorid=63#.Txnqo_l_Cqw)
http://www.dessy.com/dresses/bridesmaid/2856/?color=palomino&colorid=63#.TxnrNfl_Cqw

Champagne:
http://www.dessy.com/dresses/bridesmaid/d508/?color=champagne&colorid=950#.TxnrzPl_Cqw

And they also have Taupe, Oyster, and Cameo that could work.

But yeah.. go to dessy.com and search by colour, then pick neutrals (I think you click on the tan/taupe coloured square to get neutrals).  

Good luck!

Ana139

awwww don't stress. I feel your pain!!! I couldn't find the color I wanted and I have girls in three different states I tried giving them just color/length guidelines but same thing happened to me. You'd think letting people choose their own would be easy hahaha no. Well I ended up compromising going with a big chain store and picking color/length/fabric guidelines and offered if the girls don't feel confident about the dress just text me a picture. It helped a lot. I didn't get the EXACT color I wanted but you know what I'm happier, my girls are happier and in the end it's about you and your hubby. Good luck!!

malibukell6

I feel your pain!  I work at a bridal store and we see this all the time.  Some times what we recommend choosing one company to work with, that way you can try to have the colors of the dresses match.  One of our favorite designers and one that I think would have great colors and styles for your theme, would be The Dessy Group.  They have different divisions of bridesmaid gowns and lots of dresses to choose from.  If there is anything that I can help with, I would be happy to!  If you are interested in ordering anything for your wedding, please visit our website, www.crankybride.com

Wedding Wishes!

Kelly
kelly@crankybride.com

Cortney1982

Hmm..I've seen really pretty dresses in green and brown colors.  Neautrals?  That's tricky, unless you are really dark, that would wash most girls out.

Fabric doesn't have to be the same.  The best pictures I've seen with bridesmaid dresses are the ones wearing different dresses in varying hues of one color.

bridetobe71412

I don't understand the "wash people out" thing. I'm about as white as it gets and I think neutrals look fantastic! Just my two cents.

As far as having this same problem, I started out saying the girls should just choose their own dress, but then with 8 girls, it became way too stressful. I ended up finding one that all of them liked from JCrew in a champagne color. It's more of a gold sheen to it in person and it's gorgeous. JCrew has some really nice neutrals if you're looking for them or want to point your girls in a good direction! I also liked Watters and WToo also.

Good luck!

AlmostMrsStrong

You may want to reconsider your ban on brown dresses. My girls are all wearing this dress in Truffle, and it looks fantastic on all of them (both the color and the dress itself, and my bridesmaids come in all shapes and skin tones).

http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Short-Cotton-Dress-with-Y-Neck-and-Skirt-Pleating-83690

You could also look at the Golden or Champagne colors, but it may not work for every skin tone.

a&j2012

My BMs also say they will wear whatever I want and are asking for my opinion. We should be happy we don't have to deal with the opposite issues of them refusing to wear things!

We went dress shopping together- it may not be possible with 8 girls, but is it possible take a few of them? Or take several trips with smaller groups?

kateguess22

When I was in a wedding last year, the bride said that she wanted us in floor-length green dresses and made sure that we were okay with that. Then we all went together to a dress shop. Since all the dresses could be ordered in most any colour, we didn't worry about colour. We all grabbed dresses that we liked, and headed to change rooms to try them all on! The bride also handed us dresses. One of the girls came out in a dress that was so gorgeous on her and everyone really liked it- including the bride. The bride spoke to the associates and looked at colour palettes and found the shade that she liked best in that dress and we all went ahead and ordered them.
The description that you gave of what you want would be hard for me if I were your bridesmaid- just so you know. I would also likely be kind of confused and hoping that you could be more specific. If you could tell me that you want it in this specific David's Bridal shade with these specific sleeves then when we go we could give this info to the SA and they could help us.
Good luck to you it's no fun being stressed about bridesmaid dresses.