A Chubby Bride's Dress Dilemma!

katylady

Okay, so I've changed my lifestyle over the past year (not for my wedding, but for me) and have lost about 45 pounds since March. My wedding is a whole two years off, as I wanted to give myself a very reasonable amount of time to lose the weight I want as well as save the money I need for the wedding costs, etc..... I still have about 80 pounds to go, and I know I can do it - I've already come a long way.However, the dress that's stolen my heart is being discontinued. [url]http://www.marysbridal.com/bridal/3y705.htm[/url]How much can it be altered before I ruin a perfectly good dress? Should I buy a dress a couple of sizes smaller and have it altered down the rest of the way when the time comes? Should I just get over it and forget about the dress I've fallen in love with? (my least favorite option)Please help! I'm sure I'm not the first lady with this problem!

stace1814

Congrats on the weight loss!  As for the dress, it's probably better to wait.  Because your wedding is so far away there is a good chance that you will change your mind by then and be stuck with a dress.  Have you tried it on?  Some of the dresses that I fell in love with online looked terrible on me.  Good luck!

mbcdefg

First off, congrats on losing the weight and getting healthier. That's a hige accomplishment. Second, was it the salon that told you the dress is being discontinued? If so, I would get a second opinion elsewhere, because this might just be the salon trying to trick you into buying the dress from them right now (so that you don't wind up getting it someplace else). I would call a few other salons, maybe even the manufacturer, and ask if the dress really is being discontinued. And if the rumors are true ... then I'd take this photo to a local seamstress or two, and ask how much the dress can be altered before it loses its integrity. Ask your local board to recommend some reliable, honest people who will tell you the truth about what size you should order. You can either order it now and take the chance that it'll need major alterations ... or hold off and see if you can buy it from a website like eBay, preownedweddingdresses.com, Craigslist, savethedress.com, oncewed.com, etc. Start looking around now and see if anyone is selling it. And if all else fails, you can probably find a similar dress elsewhere. The pickup style is quite popular right now, and you can probably find a similar bodice from another designer (or have a seamstress custom-make it for you). Have you even tried this dress on yet? If not, this might all be a moot point. I fell in love with several dresses on the designers' websites, and the ones that I got to try on pretty much all looked awful on me. There were others I didn't even bother to seek out because I found one that I looked great in. Don't limit yourself to one dress when you're still two years away ... I think you ought to go shopping again in about a year and see if anything else catches your eye. I don't like gowns that I liked a year ago.

raphninja

I bought my dress last August (2008) at the Running of the Brides, and, although my wedding isn't until February, I still love the dress, perhaps even more now than when I originally bought it, so I know you can still love the style a long time later.  That being said...... my dress was 3 sizes too small when I bought it.  I've lost about a size and a half, but still have another 25 pounds to go...... in 4 months.  I KNOW I'll do it because I have to, but it's so much pressure, and it's really hard!So my advice is, that dress is a very popular style right now, like i know Maggie Sottero has some very similar ones.  Your wedding is far off.  You might be better off to wait.  But if you MUST have it, there is always the possibility of selling it if you don't like it or if it doesn't fit.P.S.- I'm having a corset put into mine just in case I don't lose the weight, so i should be ok, and that could be an option for you, as well.Best of luck!

K Byte

If you're open to waiting a bit to buy your wedding gown, other designers have similar options, so even if your dress is discontinued you can still buy a dress that has the same general style. Off the top of my head, the gown you like reminds me a bit of MS "Hampton" without the cap sleeves that are shown on the web site. [URL]http://www.maggiesottero.com/dress.aspx?line=m&pageSize=100&style=A3293HC[/URL]

VickieLan

That dress reminds me very much of the Maggie Sottero Victoriana.

dsouldiva

Keep all the pictures and fins a semstress to make it for you, it's a fairly simple gown to recreate, it won't be hard to find a similar trim and them it's just lace overlay on the bodice, the rest is just a case of finding the right fabric.if you do get it made, find a costumier who specialises in historic costumes, you will probably find they will build a better corset than a seamstress.

lookame3639

I know a lot of ladies who decide to buy a dress at sample sales or got a dress that was to big. They took it to a good seamstress and were able to take the dress from a size 10 to a size 2. The dress still looks like it should too. I know a lot who do this for the designer gowns since they are very expensive want to get a good deal so they buy the samples. I'm pretty sure you may be able to buy the dress maybe a size or 2 down from what your wearing now and then have it altered the rest of the way if oyu absolutly need to have the dress. This way you wont need a lot of alterations or you could simply hold off till the new styles come into season. You may fall in love with a different dress later

RhiannonMichele

I have to be in agreement with some of the others. You should wait. i know you will be able to find another dress that you love just as much or more. the pickup style is very popular these though I'm not a fan of it, they are everywhere. Go shopping again in a year and you will be ok. Oh and call the manufacturer to see of the dress is really being discontinued or if the salon is just choosing not to carry that Designer anymore.

brownshuga1432

when you lose more weight you may want a different dress, even want to show off your new curves/body. I think you should wait.

kimlstephens

I usually do not post things but this is a topis I know very well. In 2007 I weighted 326lbs. As of today I am 165lbs so I know if I can do it..anyoe can if you put your mind to it. Now about the dress. I would just put it out of my mind and just focus on losing the weight. I know my style and what I like changed. I purchased a Maggie Sottero Karena which is brand new still with tags earlier this year. My sister told me it was too soon and depending on how my body changes I may want something else. Well she was right. I just purchased this Kenneth Pool gown that I think was just made for me. I thought the same thing about the other gown but as my body changed so did my feelings for the dress. I would say wait for sure.

Doodle2011

WAIT. Do not buy the discontinued dress. As your body changes and evolves, you may discover a new silhouette emerges as the front runner for you. New styles are going to come out, and you can always have a dress made that combines all the bits you love in a size that works for you at the time you order it. Don't jump the gun, keep working on YOU and the dress will follow. I promise!

chest173

I would check out other designers, I think you'd be able to find something similar. I don't think you should plan on having it altered that much, or getting a size before you actually know what you'll be! here are some I found http://www.maggiesottero.com/dress.aspx?keywordType=any&pageSize=100&style=A3276B http://www.maggiesottero.com/dress.aspx?keywordType=any&pageSize=100&style=A3293HC http://www.maggiesottero.com/dress.aspx?keywordType=any&pageSize=100&style=J1250LUHC http://www.maggiesottero.com/dress.aspx?keywordType=any&pageSize=100&page=1&style=R1043HC http://www.maggiesottero.com/dress.aspx?keywordType=any&pageSize=100&page=1&style=A3185

sweety7946

Here are some more similar stylesThis one has the corset back...always a good thing[url]http://www.edenbridals.com/2301-p-1386.html[/url][url]http://www.edenbridals.com/5112-p-1621.html[/url]

blondie82784

If I was you I'd wait. You have plenty of time to find a dress and who knows you may even find one that you love more than this one. I got mine as soon as we got engaged and it'll be almost 2yrs that ill have it when we get married and im already wanting another one. Keep up the awesome job of loosin weight and when your at the weight you want to be go get one. Im sure they'll be plenty dresses to choose from plus getting the dress closer to your size will save you a lot on getting it altered

youngin12

I managed a bridal store for 5 years and was a pageant girl. Anything can be altered. I have had brides do the same thing. I ordered a 20 for a bride and she lost so much weight we took it to a 12 and it looked like it came from the factory. Also, I had a pageant dress taken from a 16 to a 2. Anything is possible. I would say BUY IT!

ngiguere

Hmmm I'd wait! If for nothing else, than this: You are doing GREAT getting into shape and getting healthy. 80 lbs down the road, your body is going to look much different, and will take on a much slimmer figure. When that happens, you may still love that dress, but have a desire to wear a style that exhibits your new body a little differently. There are so many sillhouettes, necklines, etc with wedding dresses, and so many ways to use those options so that you are showing off your form really nicely. There were about 3 or 4 dresses I could have chosen as my dress, but "the one" that I chose was the one that I loved not only in the details, but in the way it showed off my figure. Just a thought. Good luck, and keep up the good work!

lindserina

I totally feel your pain! I fell in love with a dress too, only to discover that no one in my area carried it, and traveling to find a dress was not an option. But...I ended up finding a very similar dress in a local shop, and it actually ended up working out better for my shape than the original would have. Don't give up hope! When it is time to start dress shopping, come armed with pictures of your dream dress so you have a starting point, but don't be afraid to keep an open mind. Something I heard recently on a wedding show was "the dress doesn't make the bride" and it's so true! Enjoy the process, and congratulations on your hard work! : )

psychgrrl

Like PP, congrats on the weight loss and the lifestyle change!  I agree that you might change your mind in the future and it might be best to wait.  Also (as someone who has lost weight, but not as much as you) I know that when I lost weight my style taste changed as I found I was able to wear things I previously thought I couldn't.  I say you celebrate your new self with a wedding dress that fits the new, healthier you.  I changed my mind throughout the wedding process even though I didn't change size because I bought my dress a tad too early.  In fact, I found it half price on a discount outlet and was cursing the fact that I bought it so early!

mhickey426

Wait because you don't know what size you are going to be.  You might loose more weight then you expect.  Like everyone else was saying the dress can be taken in BUT who knows if you are going to like the dress on you.  If you didn't try it on yet you might completly hate the dress On you.  From the sounds of it you are going to basically loose a whole person and are going to look like a completly different person.  I think you should wait because you might love the dress now and the way it looks on you now but not the "New" you.  I talked to a lot of people before going dress shopping and many of them said that they expected their dress to be a certain style but when they put it on the style was not for them.  They ended up buying dresses that were nothing like they expected.  The same thing happened to me i tried on the Style I "loved" but i didnt love it on me.  My dress is nothing like i thought it was going to be and I LOVEEEEEEEEEE IT!!!!! You have a ton of time dont rush it enjoy shopping for your dress when you are closer to where you want to be

berm0829

I'm with the others...wait!  Save the photos of the dress, and when you are ready you can either have it recreated or you can call the manufacturer to see if they have it or something very similar...but your body will be completely different and you may want something else by that time.  I started losing weight to get healthy before I was engaged.  I have lost 10.5 lbs. so far, and have 75 more to go, so I am not even going to look for a dress until the Spring (for my July wedding).  Congratulations on your loss so far, you should be really proud of yourself!Good luck and congratulations!

[Deleted User]

Taking the pic to a seamstress can guaruntee you get exactly what you want and sometimes it can be alot less expensive. my dream dress was 3000-5000 according to the Knot, but the seamstress could make it for under 1000 and i could make any tweeks i wanted and make it one of a kind. and the seamstress will know the ins and outs of the dress which will help when she has to take the dress in more when you lose weight.there's also a huge chance youll find another dress in that span of time. i would say bring the pic to a recommended seamstress before its discontinued and see if she can do it. make sure you see samples of her previous work though.

KRHagen

Trust....The dress you want today is not the dress you'll want in 2 years.

tots68

OMG! My dilemma is worse. I bought a dress that can not be altered because I didnt order the extra material and ive gained weight and I don't know if it will fit me in 8 mos. I don't know what im going to do!

jjax214

Hey! Definitely congratulations on the weight-loss - great job and keep it up!!I will also say to wait until you are closer to your wedding - plus, have you tried that dress on? My actual wedding dress is TOTALLY not what I liked when I was looking at photos of dresses in the beginning. If you do love that style David's Bridal has this dress, and has had it for the past two years.... http://www.davidsbridal.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplayView?storeId=10052&catalogId=10051&categoryId=-49978998&currentIdx=11&subCategory=-49999486|-49998984|-49978998&catentryId=6096838&sort=It is similar to your photo and is also the dress my sister wore in her wedding. Goodluck!!

Snapdragon750

I agree with the poster above me. You do not want to buy a dress that early, especially since your tastes, style of wedding, and body (definitely your body in this case) is likely to change a lot before then. I had a "dress of my dreams!" all picked out, and then I made a complete 180 and bought a dress I tried on practically as a joke. You never know what you'll end up loving, especially with 80 more pounds off of you! The other issue is that that is a very fancy dress. A big, glamorous wedding might be your style now, but when you get down to the nitty gritty of planning, you might decide on a much more low-key affair, and the dress will no longer be appropriate for the venue you want, which will force you to choose between them. Don't do that to yourself. There are lots of dresses in a similar style to the one you love, so even if you don't change your mind in two years (and brides change their minds more often than anyone), you're likely to get a dress very much like it anyway, and without stressing over whether or not it will still fit your new body. Good luck!

shanikashannon

I think you should wait, there are and will be other dresses that are very similar to that one. as time goes by your style of dressed desired might change sometimes even what you think you like is not what looks best on you start saving the money for your dress, so that when the time comes you can get what ever you choose

ejvoight

Congrats on the weight loss!  Regarding the dress, I would recommend waiting.  As others have said, something that you see online don't always look the way you think they will (in fact, I insisted on trying one dress on that I saw online and it wasn't the dress at all, the dress I did buy doesn't look as pretty online as it does when I have it on).  Plus, I would pass along advice that I got when I was buying my dress...there will always be another one that you like just as much if not more!  For me, it was a way of saying stop looking.  For you, I think it would mean, just take your time and wait it out.  You never know what you will come accross.  Definitely keep pictures of this dress, and you can work on finding something similar if you want when you do begin shopping.  I really hope this helps!

Kristinohya

My suggestion is wait..... My reasoning is simple- the dress you love may fit ENTIRELY different once you lose the weight. As a size 6 at age 18 I was a 36B, as a size 24 at age 23 I was a 40D, as a size 12 at age 25 I'm a 38D.... catch my drift? The dress you love may not be as flattering 80 lbs from now. Or you may have such a svelte new figure you decided to try a different style. Wedding dresses don't vary that much and I am positive you will find something nearly identical if you wait and look hard enough- but by waiting you also leave yourself alot of other options.

Kristinohya

ps check out mccalls pattern number 5321 its nearly similar- you can buy the pattern and have it embellished to look like that- if you cant find it two years from now and still want it you have the outline for a seamstress to work with....... and if it doesnt work out your out 20 bucks instead of hundreds of bucks......

Dgreer1

Try plussizebridal.com! They have some discontinued dresses, and as their name implies, they have plus sizes...but they REALLY have dresses that range from size 0 to 32! i bought my wedding dress htere and my wedding is in 2 weeks! The seamstress that is doing my alterations told me to "get a dress at your current size--because you can always take a dress in, but it is harder to let a dress out!" This is my dress: http://www.plussizebridal.com/Catalog_Enlarge.asp?ProductID=W273&StyleNo=W273&SizeChart=B