Attire & Accessories Forum

Groom wants to wear all black

My FI has decided he wants to wear all black. Black suit, black shirt, black vest, and black tie! I'm saying that will be black overload, but he thinks it will look nice. He says he's fine with the groomsmen wearing black suits, white shirts, purple vests, but he wants to wear all black. I keep telling him we won't look cohesive if he wears a black shirt, the only thing I want him to wear differently is a white shirt. But he says if I can wear all white, he can wear all black. 

So, I need some opinions! Am I making a big deal out of nothing? I think I just need an outside point of view. If I'm being ridiculous, I'd be glad to just give up on the whole white shirt debacle. I just can't seem to get past the all black look. Thanks in advance for your opinions!
BabyFetus Ticker

Re: Groom wants to wear all black

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    It's his day too, let him wear what he wants.

    Luckily, what he wants won't look horrible next to the groomsmens ;)
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    I am in the same boat! My groom is a self-procalimed "Bro" and black is pretty much his everyday wardrobe. Black T-shirt (usually Affliction or something similar, if you know the brand) and blue jeans. So, we are fighting the same battle and of course everyone is probably expecting him to wear all balck also.

    However, our colors are hot pink and navy blue (No black!), and it is an outdoor mid-may wedding at a vineyard in california. Its going to be HOT, and he breaks a sweat with the A/C on! He is going to fry in an all black ensemble. (See, I'm worried about his well-being, right?) I would much rather prefer that the guys wear navy blue suits, and I really don't see black fitting into the color scheme at all. (Navy GMs and black groom? Bleh, that doesn't match!)

    I kinda made a compromise that since I am going to have a hot pink bouquet, (MOH is in a hot pink dress, BMs in navy dress, BM in Navy suit with pink tie, GMs in navy suit, everyone will have white flowers/bouts) if he wants to wear all black, than he needs to have a hot pink bout, so at least it kinda matches.

    I'm obsessed with things matching apparently...

    Try to find a compromise. As I am learning through this whole wedding planning deal, its only one day, we have the rest of our lives with our men.  Don't burn bridges just to have your way when honestly, nobody will probably notice or care.
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    At no other party do the guests of honor have to match the decor.  What makes a wedding different?

    He doesn't have to match his groomsmen at all.  How would you feel if he tried to tell you that your dress had to be a certain style?  It's his wedding too, let him wear what he wants.
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    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    ^^^ what she said.

    let him do whatever he wants. as long as he's not being completely ridiculous (which he's not) let him wear what he wants and will be comfortable in. it's his day too.
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    Let him wear what he wants.  It's his wedding too, and his day to look awesome.  Unless he got to determine the style and color of your dress, you have no clout to say what he can and cannot wear.

    Personally, I think he'll look awesome in an all black ensemble.  Can you bring different textures into his outfit?  Like black satin tie, a black on black pattered vest that works with the tie.

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    hollieheidihollieheidi member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited January 2010
    Johnny Cash........classic style.........

    I saw pics of a wedding once where all of the BMs wore vivid color dresses and the groomsmen wore all black with a tie that matched the BM's dress.  Even in the middle of summer it was very classy looking.

    I don't think he's asking anything's his day too!
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    edited January 2010
    Thanks Ladies! That's just what I needed! You are completely right. It's one day, I get to wear what I want, he should definitely be able to wear what he wants. He even compromised and said he'll wear whatever socks I want :) Thanks so much for your honest opinions. I need to stop stressing the small stuff!!!

    He even joked that if I don't like the all black look his next choice would be an orange Dumb & Dumber style tuxedo! I guess anything is better than that!
    BabyFetus Ticker
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    I personally love the all black look.  And it will be extremely visually stunning for you to be in all white and for him to be in all black.  Also, he won't clash with the GM.  My FI won't be matching our GM.  I think that it actually will look better.  You won't look exactly like your BM, although they will be complementing your look.  Why should your FI look exactly like his GM?  Let him have his unique look too.
    "This is the most extraordinary thing about motherhood - finding a piece of yourself separate and apart that all the same you could not live without." ? Jodi Picoult Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
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    I think your FI is just trying to be difficult. Although many men look fantastic in Black- a white shirt will brighten him up (regardless of skin tione). He does not want to look like he is in mourning and I would ask that his mother and/or father speak to him about it. Of course you are wearing white. That is the common color of the bride! Compromise with him on something else; but I have to say, wearing a white shirt is not something anyone should argue about. And yes, it is his day and your day; but you will oth be looking at these pics for a long time... maybe ask your photographer to mention how he will photograph better?
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    I have picked what he will be wearing. My future husband has had a very "whatever makes you happy" approach to planning our wedding, which has been extremely frustrating. So, when it comes to what he will be wearing I don't see why the rules would change now. I will honor his request not to be in all white or have tails, but other than that I am in charge of his attire.
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    I agree with your concern, however, do you want a wedding or a marriage? In retrospect, 25 years from now I'm sure you won't care what colors he wore, only that you had the best time with your new husband and friends and family on the first day of your new life together. No one else will care what colors he wore, if he wants to sweat-let him! I think you need to let this one go and remember that you got to pick your dress, so let him pick what he wants to wear. I want everything to look coordinated too, but at some point you need to let loose and let everyone have fun. Don't let this little thing get you in a fight, it's pretty far down on the scale of importance. Spend your time fighting world hunger ;)
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    cukimerrydollcukimerrydoll member
    First Comment
    edited January 2010
    In Response to <a href="">Re: Groom wants to wear all black</a>:
    [QUOTE]He even compromised and said he'll wear whatever socks I want :)
    Posted by mmgrillo[/QUOTE]
    I'm all for argyle! 
    Socks might be my favorite item of clothing though.  They even made the registry (in argyle... come to think of it - slipper socks).
    <img src="" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />

    In Response to <a href="">Re: Groom wants to wear all black</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm amused that you mentioned he said if he can't do all black, he'll go orange and ruffles a la Dumb and Dumber. My fiance keeps asking me what he and the groomsmen are going to wear.  I tell him it's really up to him, and if he doesn't decide, I'm going to choose a lavender version of one of the "Dumb and Dumber" ensembles.....
    Posted by PDXMartha[/QUOTE]
    Funny!  My FH is taking a very classic look - one that his friend did this past summer and my uncles did 15 and 20 years ago (I'm the oldest of my cousins... so it's not that strange).  He's doing the black tux; a white shirt, tie, and bouteniere; and some kind of embellished white and silver (?) vest.
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    My fiance is wearing a black suit and black shirt but a white vest and white tie...I personally love the look but thats just my opinion...he also considered all black but in the end I told him to wear whatever he wanted and would be comfortable in
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