Every Woman for Herself

megben88

I had originally wanted to have my bridesmaids wear the same color but different dresses, that didn't work out. Everyone kept asking questions about length, bling, sleeves/no sleeves, blah blah blah....so I picked out a dress that actually looks really great on everyone, in a color that goes with the wedding (my MOH and best friend helped decide). So that takes care of the dresses. I'm leaving it up to each of them to do their own hair and own makeup and pick out their own shoes. I want my wedding to be as much (ok maybe not AS much) about them as it is me. I want them to be able to express who they are through how they look, because who each of them is inside is the reason they are my friends and why they are in my wedding in the first place.
Does anyone think this is nuts?? Or am I doing a good thing for them. I've seen weddings where all the bridesmaids look exactly the same and I think it's boring. I want my girls to feel special in their own right. Plus, the dress I picked is only $60 so this way they won't have to spend any more money than absolutely necessary.

srkropf

Nope, this is my plan as well. Cuts down on the drama and headaches on my end and you come across as a friend instead of a beeyatch! 

opalsky007

I think it'll be great. I think the matchy-matchy look from head to toe is overkill, and often doesn't work out anyway.

For example, everyone's feet are different, and even if you could get everyone to agree on one shoe, crap happens. Half of my bridal party was recovering from knee or ankle injuries on my wedding day. No matching heels for us.

Also, the last wedding I was in, the bride gave us matching jewelry: miniscule amethyst heart necklaces and earrings. You couldn't see either from far away, and I wound up having to wear different earrings because the bride didn't realize I wasn't pierced.

aerinpegadrak

On the contrary, I think it's nuts to dictate such small details.  You're absolutely right, it's really much better for all involved to let them figure out the rest of their look themselves.  I didn't give my girls any direction whatsoever on accessories (except to encourage funky headgear since I was wearing a hat), and they all pulled it off splendidly.

Manwaithiel

I think it's wonderful. My BMs have 3 guidelines. Some shade of blue, knee length, and silverish shoes. Heck, I probably wouldn't care if they wanted to wear a different color shoe. I think it's weird when everyone's all matchy matchy. I don't want clones. I want my friends. And if they wouldn't go out and buy that dress together any other day, why should they do so now?

ambermorley

I am doing something very similar - I sent a paint sample card and had them try to get close to it with whatever dress they wanted of the same hem length. I am going to ask them to have their own metallic shoes (almost everyone has a pair of gold or silver dress shoes, or can find them very easily.)

One concern - I worry that I am ending up giving them too much to do in having to pick out everything themselves. I am leaning toward gifting them all the same pearl necklace, so that I am actually participating. They are doing it for me after all, I should be helpful!