fathers of the bride and groom

MrsSargentDisney

My wedding is very casual. The grooms men are wearing suits and ties but i was wondering, should our fathers wear matching suits? or nice dress shirts and slacks

danielle16_17

well thank about what you want in pictures- do you want him to match the groomsman

jagore08

We told our fathers what the BP was wearing and let them decide for themselves (because they're big boys and we figured they wouldn't wear anything that would be embarrassing).  They ended up in black suits like the BP and we offered to purchase ties for them.

PreppySailor

I have heard from several menswear shops that the fathers should match the respective mothers, and not necessarily the wedding party. You should ask them what they'd be most comfortable in.

PDXMartha

we're letting our Dad's decide.  Well, my mom told my Dad he has to wear a Tux since he's walking me down the aisle, but my FFIL will likely wear a suit.  It's up to them.

SarahPLiz

Fathers are not part of the wedding party so you can't dictate their attire. They have been dressing themselves for a long time, so just let them decide what they want to wear.

aerinpegadrak

They're not members of the wedding party, so you don't get to tell them how to dress.  Our groomsmen will be in tuxes, but it will be up to the dads whether they want to wear a tux as well, or just a suit.

If anyone's wearing a tie, it's not really a "very casual" wedding...

t.kaufman

I disagree. I think you can definitely tell them what to wear. Personally, I do not trust my dad or my future father in law to dress themselves. And in all honesty, my dad would not trust himself. He wants to make sure that what he wears is perfect for what I want for my wedding.

Just because men [and our fathers] CAN dress themselves, doesn't mean they should. They might even appreciate a little help. And in your case, I would put them in suits to match the groomsmen. Doesn't have to be the exact same suit, but I think they should be just as dressed up. Of course if they are bad at taking directions, you can use your mom and fmil to push them in the right direction.

lchamnes

"I think you can definitely tell them what to wear. Personally, I do not trust my dad or my future father in law to dress themselves."

Wow.  I don't think it is a good idea to start your married life by treating your father or f-fil like a child.  Only you know the feel of the big day, so you'll know what level of dress is appropriate.  But no, they don't have to match each other, and no they don't have to match the wedding party.

If they ask you for advice on what to wear, then by all means offer your advice.  But if they don't ask, trust that they'll respect you enough to dress appropriately for your wedding day.

hughe046

Lol- whatever, why are you all so mad?  And why are you being so mean to that girl?  Wow...how about you not make comments about someone else's relationship?  Or go post on the Snarky Bride board if you are going to be like that.
My own FI stands in front of the closet and asks me what to wear all the time- same with Dad, they are guys for crying out loud.

Anyhow, our groomsmen are wearing khaki pants, navy blue blazers and we are giving them Vineyard Vines ties.  Dad asked me if I wanted him to wear that or a suit.  I didn't want Dad to feel left out or like he was a groomsman, so I decided it would be great for him to wear a suit and we would also get him the Vineyards Vines tie.

SpookyKiwi

My dad was completely confused about to wear, so I suggested he wear the black suit he already has [since the groomsmen will all be wearing them] and I offered to rent a vest & tie combo for him that will go [but probably not match] the groomsmen.  I haven't spoken to my FFIL but I will ask nicely that he wear a suit, perferably black, if that is possible, and ask if he would like us to pick out a vest and tie combo for him.  In the end its the men's choice, but I've voiced my opinion and offered to help--which so far, has been gratefully taken!

juliels53

My dad and FFIL are wearing coordinating tuxes to the groomsman--which both are fine with, bc like pp, they're just guys. The groomsman are wearing a dark violet vest and tie, the dads will wear black in the same pattern, the groom in ivory, and the ushers in silver. GL!

aerinpegadrak

And I think it's really sexist to assume that guys can't dress themselves.  My FI is more fashion conscious than I am.  It's one thing to offer an opinion if they ask, but if they don't ask, then it's not something the bride has to worry about.

jenniferceline

"I think you can definitely tell them what to wear. Personally, I do not trust my dad or my future father in law to dress themselves."

This may make some people mad, but I completely understand this statement. It may not be true for everyone... but it is true for me.

What I'm about to say isn't a lie. Seriously. My dad wanted to wear a camouflage tuxedo to my wedding. He told my FI, and told him not to let me know... because he wanted it to be a surprise. FI told me immediately.  I guess my dad thought "Vegas wedding" = "joke wedding?"

So, in conclusion, some brides fathers are inclined to thinking that camouflage tuxedos are appropriate attire for a wedding. THOSE fathers need some assistance.