I just have to vent...

cs2004cm

I haven't even been engaged for a month yet and already I'm fed up with planning my wedding. It seems like every one of my family and friends have to put their two cents in about my wedding and it's always something negative. 

I have always wanted a December wedding, my fiancee and I have been together since we were 16 and 7 years later we are finally getting married. We first started going out in December so that month has always been special to us. But every chance they get my parents tell me that December is a bad idea because it might snow. My mother called and told me last night that she thought it was poor judgement to have a wedding in December because we might get a blizzard and I have to think about my guests. I live in the Philadelphia/NewJersey area where we usually get snow in late January and February. Do we sometimes get snow in December? Yes but not usually and it's not such a bad storm that the wedding would have to be called off. My mother is also one of those typical Asian "tiger moms" so keep that in mind....

My soon-to-be mother-in-law doesn't seem to like the idea of my bridesmaids wearing different style dresses. But she's not so bad. She didn't out-right say that she hated the idea but she did say "I like it when the bridesmaids all wear the same dress."

My brother was killed last October in a car accident, 3 hours before his 22nd birthday so I've been dealing with that and now I have to deal with the fact that he's not going to be at my wedding. So I wanted to honor him during the ceremony but I didn't want to just have a place for him in the pews because he would have been one of my fiancee's groomsmen so I wanted a place set up on the altar for him and I wanted my fiancee's sister (who would have been walking with him) to walk up holding a picture of Joe and then place it on the area of the altar and then when I walked up to the altar I could place a flower in front of his picture. But when I tell my idea to people they don't seem to like it and give me suggestions. 

I don't know I just feel over whelmed. So thanks for letting me rant. I just needed to get this off my chest to people who were not my family and friends. 

roxanneroselli

Ignore what other people are saying. This is about you and your fiance, not them! Do what you want and what is important to you. Honor your brother how you feel you should and if other people are going to be upset or judgemental of anything in your wedding then they don't deserve to be there.

P.S. I like the way you want to honor your brother

rachelaedwards

Love the way you want to honor your brother...very sweet and touching.

All of us are obviously December brides - but only some of us have to deal with the looming questions of "blizzard and snow".  I am a New england bride and we got snow in OCTOBER this year (like 8 inches) and around here that is prime wedding month! Just goes to show you never KNOW and cant decides dates by the probability of WEATHER!

My friend had the last weekend of August this past year and it was a HURRICANE! She had to cancel!

I am actually hoping for a little snow on my date (12-1-12) like 2 inches would be perfect!

M1ssJ

Girl , your mom will get over it!  I would advise you, however, to get wedding insurance just in case it does have to be cancelled because of snow. but planning on the 50 million what ifs will get you no where. Tell Momma to relax!

STBMrsDio

I think we're all pretty much in the same boat. My family has 1)inflated the guest list, 2) changed a brunch wedding into an evening wedding, 3) pestered me to use jordan almonds 4) tried to get me to change my wedding colors, etc. etc. You've got to ignore them and do what you think is best. I think the idea you have for your brother is both touching and very sincere. The person whose opinion matters most is your own (and future Hubby's). At the end of the day some people will be offended that you ignored them but everyone at your wedding will think it is beautiful. And if they don't...well they suck and it's your day

HeathenSwan

Regardding the snow, I have friends who were married on 30 October 2011, in the Poconos (they traveled from OH). There was a freak blizzard that weekend that hammered most of NJ and PA. I'm originally from that area, and I don't remember an October where it's snowed more than a dusting in my entire life. Point is, the weather is unpredictable, so there's no point in worrying about it. It could snow, or it could be 60 degrees. Have the date you want, and ask your mom to back off (nicely).

I'm so sorry for your loss. I think the way you want to honor your brother is beautiful.

shtaycee5

I get the same thing. My MIL loves the heat, not me. Lol. As for the snow in the Poconos in October, I attended a wedding and the hotel lost power. Many of the guests didn't come but they still had a great time. What is most important is marrying the man you love.

jmbersani3

read "the conscious bride"! My gal pals recommended it to me. I think it would be good for you too!

And screw everyone else, its your day!