What's your...

wingedbride

wow, bethie, a quote from a reviewed journal source? what kind of crazy actual research will you come up with next?

FallinAgain

My great-grandparents married at 16 and 18 and stayed together unti his death at 84.  She bore him 11 kids and he cheated on her continuously.

My parents married at 18 and just celebrated 40 years.  They are happy now, but both would tell you they got married too young and that waiting would have made things much easier.

_Fenton

Why do you think that if you're not into partying, that means your only alternative is to get married?  You can be a responsible workaholic who never drinks and has a boyfriend.

Please do me a favor and copy and paste this post and save it on your computer.  You will piss yourself laughing in ten years.

skidmark

My walker and oxygen tank are always getting in the way of playing with Ben.

SarahBethBR

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_whats?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:02c060e9-1909-40f4-9526-e8cbdf53d709Post:bf07c182-1481-4188-a2f5-313d87eef25d">Re: What's your...</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm sorry to learn that I am too old to enjoy playing with my child.  What should I do with her Meghan?
Posted by audreyhorne[/QUOTE]

Please send her to me post haste.  I'm still in my early 20s, so I can still play with her, AND I can figure out these newfangled digital cameras so you can see lots of adorable pictures of her and those gorgeous eyes.

tarafire

I always thought that I had wanted to marry the guy I was with in high school. He said he wanted to marry me, only to get my V-Card. I am detecting a V-card being deposited recently, and now you think you HAVE to get married. Honey trust me just one year of college, and you will realize you're way different. Your current fiance will not have the same thinking path as you, and you'll end up seperating.
It happens to basically everyone I know except one couple who got married at 19 and 24, and she's been poping out babies ever since.
Save yourself the trouble and get out into the real world.

aplatanada

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_whats?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:02c060e9-1909-40f4-9526-e8cbdf53d709Post:63ceae56-0718-4379-94da-ebbe23fe072a">Re: What's your...</a>:
[QUOTE]Also, kids! I'm not saying I want them now, but I don't want to be 30 and having kids. I want to have the energy to play with my children. 
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]<div><div>
</div><div>I have WAY more energy at 32 than I did at 22. Or 17 and a half. And more maturity to give a kid (once I have one). And more money. And more education. </div><div>
</div><div><em>Note to self: Don't forget to pick up Depends on the way home from the Early Bird Special!</em></div><div>
</div></div>

MamaKin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_whats?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:02c060e9-1909-40f4-9526-e8cbdf53d709Post:63ceae56-0718-4379-94da-ebbe23fe072a">Re: What's your...</a>:
[QUOTE] Statistics have shown (<strong>and I'm not talking about today's statistics</strong>) that when you marry young you "grow up" together. There is less conflict in marriage because you become more accepting, you've never gone out and done things "on your own", so it's kind of like moving from a house with your parents to a shared dorm. You respect your roommate and y'all have "mutual rules". It's the same here. Versus going out and having your own place where you can do what you want, when you want. <strong>Stay out as late as you want and have personal freedom. After you have it all, it won't be as easy to give it up.</strong> That's what I'm afraid of, I'm afraid that I'm going to be too stubborn to bend a little when things don't go exactly as I want. This way, I wont have to worry about being set in my ways. Also, kids! I'm not saying I want them now, but <strong>I don't want to be 30 and having kids. I want to have the energy to play with my children</strong>. All of my grandparents are still alive and three of my great-grandparents are still alive. I love that I have gotten a chance to know 3 generations of my family. I want the same for my kids. I don't want them until after college but I'll only be 22 by then, so that is still very young to have kids. Back to what I was saying about today's statistics. Too many teens today marry for the wrong reasons. They get married because they want out of their parents house or because they are expecting a baby. That's what gives teenage marriage a bad name. That's why the divorce rates are so high in teenage marriages. My fiance and I have read books, done work books, attended premaritial counceling. He went to my dad for my hand and my dad agreed. My entire family approves. Yes it will be hard, I'm not denying that. But it's all in how you work through your hardships. If you give up, of course your marriage will end in divorce.
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]

a) not talking about today's statistics?  why would you qualify that?  "hey everyone, the information i'm using to back up my argument is extremely outdated and not terribly relevant."

b) you think marriage involves giving up personal freedom?  and not only is that okay with you, but instead of "giving it up", you'd just rather never even experience personal freedom?  ricidulous.    any healthy marriage involves TWO people with total personal freedom (this is one of those things that will make more sense in 5-10 years).

c) i'm CRACKING UP that at 30 you won't have the energy to play with children.  again, you will see the hilarity in 10 years.  when i was a teenager, i thought 30 seemed old too.


i think you're just scared to be on your own.  which, as you said, is exactly the reason for moving out of the parents' house and immediately moving in with your husband.. so you don't have to *gasp* become your own person!  i know you think you're done growing up, but like many other things you've said, this is just an indication of how young and immature you are.   just rest assured that you'll have all of this figured out for your second marriage when you're in your 30s.

stellina09

this post is absolutely hysterical.

OP - i think everyones responses can be summed up by saying, your arguments alone are the reasons why you shouldnt be getting married at 17.

when i read your arguments, this is what i am really hearing:
but my mommy and daddy and grandparents did it so why cant I?

omg, 30 is like, so old!

meghan_marie

Okay here's the deal. I'm going to ignore everybody's advice on here (maybe that's the rebellious, immature side of me comming out... hell I don't know I'm just a stupid teen). When my marriage survives (because we know how to work with each other and not against each other) I'll post back on here. I'll give it 5 years, because apparently that's an eternity for a teenage couple to be together, we'll see who gets the last laugh. I'll come back screaming I wasn't crazy. 

And no, if everybody was trying to convince me to marry him, I would still do it. He traveled out of the state to talk to my family about their thoughts on us getting married. Everybody thought it was a great idea (I didn't even know what he was up to at the time). It wasn't until I got home from work one night and saw him outside talking to my dad, I asked my sister what he was doing here and that's when I found out he was asking for my hand. Sure, we had discussed the possibility of marriage in the future but I didn't realize he was ready for the future to start now. My dad said "yes". He explained to him how hard it can be to make it as a teenage couple and sat us both down and figured out a long list of bills. Explained to us that neither one of us will be allowed on our parent's health insurance anymore. He brought up the possibility of an unplanned pregnancy. He said that when he married Tamme (my mom), money almost caused them to get a divorce, because imagine this, they spent it all on furniture and appliances (savings included). And then my mom started hiding credit cards. He said he was layed off so they had to travel anywhere my dad could find work. My mom switched high schools so many times it isn't funny. So my mom never got the opportunity to take her free-ride to college. He explained the possibility of injury that can keep you out of work for months at a time. We listened. We agreed to think carefully about it. Then we attended pre-maritial counceling. There we listened to the same song and dance we had heard earlier. We were encouraged to keep God first in our relationship. For anyone who cares to hear it, we've never had a fight, yeah I said it. We communicate our thoughts without having to raise our voices over each other. Like I've said, I've looked into this. I know what to expect. I've had 3 generations tell me basically the same story, it's hard, you'll have no money, you might get pregnant, you might get hurt, he might get hurt.

I know what i'm getting myself into. He knows what he's getting himself into.

By the way, I want to throw this out there... his mom got pregnant with her oldest son at 15. She married the father soon after (16), to make things right. There is a classic example of marrying for the wrong reasons. She was divorced at 18. Ironically, she is all for our marriage. She says that we have a strong relationship and she supports us 100%.
She had Josh at the age of 34. She is now 53. I love her to death, and God knows Josh does. But he himself has told me that he does not want to have kids in his 30's he said the older she got, the less energy and patience she had with him. She warned me of the same thing. She said that she wouldn't trade Jeffrey (her first born) for the world and if she could go back and do it all over again, she wouldn't do a single thing differently. She said she had tons of patience with him and was more willing to do things with him (bring him to the park, zoo, have multiple kids stay the night for a birthday party). She told me to have kids young. Not as young as her, but still young. She is two years younger than my grandma and is just getting her kids out of her house. Her third husband has been complaining because they dont have the house to themselves. When I'm fifty and going through menapause, I don't want to take it out on my kids. I'm sorry if y'all feel differently.

meghan_marie

Oh and what I meant about today's statistics is that teen pregnancy is on the rise. More and more teens are marrying out of wedlock. That's the majority of all teen marriages right there. And people wonder why half of all teen marriages dont make it. One irresponsible decision led to another.

.rosenjoe

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_whats?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:02c060e9-1909-40f4-9526-e8cbdf53d709Post:acd3bf61-9f2a-4dd2-9493-289452183e94">Re: What's your...</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh and what I meant about today's statistics is that teen pregnancy is on the rise.<strong> More and more teens are marrying out of wedlock.</strong> That's the majority of all teen marriages right there. And people wonder why half of all teen marriages dont make it. One irresponsible decision led to another.
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]
And you wonder why people told you to get an education before you got married...

meghan_marie

Oh and tarafire. I deposited my V-card a few years back to a guy that I just knew I was in love with. Until he turned into the scum of the earth. And I figured out that I loved him, but was never in-love with him. This time, it's different. The feeling is different. It's a different kind of love and I think everybody on here knows this feeling.

He gave up his V-card to a different girl as well.

We both agreed that it would be better to wait until we get married to do it again.

meghan_marie

rosenjoe

mmm... can't say anybodys opinion that I trust has told me that one. They have just told me to "make sure you get an education".

And teen pregnancy isn't an issue with me unless the Mary effect takes place. We are abstaining until marriage.

.rosenjoe

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_whats?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:02c060e9-1909-40f4-9526-e8cbdf53d709Post:0e1f1673-9539-40e2-be30-e2df27f68ed9">Re: What's your...</a>:
[QUOTE]And teen pregnancy isn't an issue with me unless the Mary effect takes place. We are abstaining until marriage.
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]

So you're going to be 20 or older when you get married?  Because a married, pregnant teenager is still a pregnant teenager.

CaliopeSpidrman

Stop it, you're making my sides hurt from all the laughter.  5 years = success!  You know what you're doing!  Never fighting = relationship perfection!  You thought you knew love before but turned out to be wrong, but now you really know it's love because this time is SO different!  One person had a hard time keeping up with her second (or third or fourth or whatever) kid, therefore kids after 30 is too hard! 
You really ought to do this as a stand up comedy routine.  It's gold!

FYI -- my parents had all their kids in their 30s with no problems.  My sister had her daughter at 19, and my niece is messed up and my sister (despite what she claims and thinks) is a shittyass parent.  She was too self involved in living out her own missed childhood that my niece got pushed to the side.  All her young energy was spent being an immature skank!  So if I apply your rule of 1 person's experience making something true, I would recommend you don't have a kid at 19 because you'll end up a divorced selfish whoreface with a messed up kid with zero coping skills.

Giggity19

The fact that your dad had to sit down and go over all of those things (bills, insurance, etc.) with the two of you doesn't support your "we're mature enough to handle it" argument. 

Teenage pregnancy rates have actually declined drastically since 1990 and have only shown slight increases in a few recent years.  People have babies out of wedlock, in part, due to the fact that though not being able to keep it in their pants, they sometimes listen to people like us when we say not to get married while you're still an idiot, as opposed to being forced to marry someone because you'll be shunned by society.  Progress, yo.

meghan_marie

Wow. Is nobody on here open to new ideas? Can nobody on here take a chance on faith?

Thank y'all for bringing it to my attention that over the past 50 years teenagers have in fact grown less mature and now all of a sudden don't have a clue what love is. Funny how relationships worked back then (because gasp, 50 years wasn't that long ago. It's funny how we can still be raising kids at 50 because THAT'S STILL YOUNG).

I really hope this isn't an indication of how your marriages will work out, because I hate to break it to you, but people change over time. If you aren't open to change... your marriage will not survive.

.rosenjoe

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_whats?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:02c060e9-1909-40f4-9526-e8cbdf53d709Post:a4e870b1-dfc1-46cd-a768-2a0bb00e9cbf">Re: What's your...</a>:
[QUOTE] I really hope this isn't an indication of how your marriages will work out, because I hate to break it to you, but people change over time. If you aren't open to change... your marriage will not survive.
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]

Does this mean you feel sorry for our husbands?  Please say you feel sorry for our husbands and the children that we will bear when we're old and decrepit.

Also, yes, dumbshit, people change over time.  Especially when that "time" is between 17 and 25.  That's what we're trying to tell you.  You won't be the same person then as you are now, and neither will he.  If you waited until you were secure in who you were (not from an "I'm so mature for my age" standpoint, but from a "my brain is done developing and I have some life experience that doesn't involve mommy and daddy having to teach me After School Special lessons" standpoint), the change would not be as likely to negatively influence your relationship.

CaliopeSpidrman

I'm sure your marriage will survive because you're so willing to settle for what you have now and not bother getting any goals and dreams of your own.  Being complacent about your own life and situation is how a lot of marriages can make it for the long haul.  Who cares if you're actually miserable?  You haven't gotten a divorce, that makes you a success! 

lindsayll

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_whats?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:02c060e9-1909-40f4-9526-e8cbdf53d709Post:a4e870b1-dfc1-46cd-a768-2a0bb00e9cbf">Re: What's your...</a>:
[QUOTE]Wow. Is nobody on here open to new ideas?
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]

Actually, you seem to be the one clinging to the old ideas about marriage.

[QUOTE]Thank y'all for bringing it to my attention that over the past 50 years teenagers have in fact grown less mature and now all of a sudden don't have a clue what love is. Funny how relationships worked back then (because gasp, 50 years wasn't that long ago.
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]

Teenagers have always been immature, nothing has changed about that.  It's the world that has changed, more so in the last 50 years than in any previous 50 year period in history.  The world was simpler back in the Leave it to Beaver days you seem so eager to relive.  Now, more education is necessary than ever to have a good, lasting career.  The cost of living has increased to the point where a dual income is almost a requirement to raise a family with a comfortable standard of living.  Women are encouraged to get educated and have real careers, which they are no longer expected to give up as soon as they get married and/or have babies.

[QUOTE](because gasp, 50 years wasn't that long ago. It's funny how we can still be raising kids at 50 because THAT'S STILL YOUNG).
Posted by meghan_marie[/QUOTE]

Huh? Sounds like you are mixing two different arguments, and contradicting your previous statement that anyone over 30 is not spry enough to be raising kids.  All within the same set of parentheses.

But I'm so glad to know I won't be able to keep up with my daughter since I'm the ripe old age of 32.  Thank you for giving me the head's up.  I guess I'll just have to hand her over to some young whippersnapper like yourself.

HappyTummy613

I wonder how the paper turned out.