My poor brother... (A little ranty and long, I apologize)

Dferrari17

I just got back home from visiting family and got to see my brother and his family for the first time in a couple years (they live in Guam!). It was awesome seeing them (and meeting my 2 adorable neices), but it was really tough for me to see how mean his wife can be to him.

A little background: He is a year older than me and all through high school he never really dated. The summer after graduating he started seeing this girl that had gone to school with us but was a few years older. She was always pretty nice but VERY dramatic and was the type of girl that wanted to get married, now, no matter what. My mom and I weren't huge fans of her but we figured as long as he was happy we couldn't complain. Well one night he was dead set on breaking up with her, went to her house... and came back engaged! We were more than confused!

My favorite story ever was when he accidently introduced her as his girlfriend to someone after they were engaged and she ran away crying.

Anywho, a few months later they were married (he's military and was being shipped out). As horrible as it sounds we were stuck with her and decided to start fresh and give her a second chance. But every time we were around them we just couldn't help but notice that she was pretty mean to him. She yells at him for absolutely nothing, put him down... and it seems to me he tries really hard to be a good husband and dad.

She was cooking the other day and he asked if she wanted any help. Her response? "WHY WOULD I NEED HELP?! STOP ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS"
This type of thing happened constantly and has only seemed to have gotten worse.

I know I don't see what happens behind closed doors so my opinion could be totally biased but I HATE seeing my brother treated like that. It makes me want to smack this girl upside the head! I couldn't imagine being treated that way everyday for the rest of my life! UGH!!!!!!!!

Sorry! I guess I just needed to vent. Thanks for listening/randomly scanning through.

lkpeaocck

What a bitch. No offense to your brother, but too bad he didn't grow a pair before kids were involved. Poor guy.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

Well I feel for you and for your brother.  Sounds like he was trapped into marriage Hopefully things aren't as bad behind closed doors as they are at face value.

Dferrari17

You know, that's the biggest thing we were worried about. I think the kids have definitely made things worse. She has not worked a day since they got married and is  a stay at home mom, which I realize is a tough job on it's own. But he also works 12 hour days to support them and apparently comes home and cleans the house on most days.

We had hoped he would come to his senses but he's very traditional and I dont think he really believes in divorce. I can just only hope that she grows up someday and starts treating him like he deserves.

Oh, and you guys might enjoy this. He proposed without a ring and she told him that she had to have "at the very least 1.5 carats." He was just starting out in the military and wasn't making much money so he bought her a large CZ in a very pretty setting to be kind of a place holder until he could afford the real thing. She responded by crying for 3 days. Is it bad that I couldn't help but laugh?

kpwedkk

Oh   Poor brother.  I hope his wife wakes up and smells the coffee if he gets injured or something at work.  She's taking him for granted!

[Deleted User]

Like PP said, it's too bad he didn't sack up and stand up for himself in the beginning. Now kids are involved and she sounds like a total tool. But, it's not too late for him to defend himself and say he won't be treated that way. I'd be the first telling her that the crying sh!t is going to stop right then and there.

My brother is kind of like that, he's still young and with his first real girlfriend. She's nice, but man she can be annoying and condescending at times. And he was completely oblivious. Finally my mom couldn't take it anymore and snapped, told the GF she would not be talked down to in her own home and my brother got a clue. Now the GF knows her place and is a total sweetheart to everyone.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

Stories like this make me sad.  I feel like marriage should be a blessing and even though times are tough - couples should be happy, and not feel like they're forced into things like your brother seems to have been. 

Dferrari17

We've talked to him about it on several occassion and asked him why he let her treat him that way and he's totally oblivious. At least he acts like he is. From time to time we can tell that it bugs him.

I just can't imagine spending my life like that. I spent just a year with a guy that treated me similarly and it drove me up the wall. I can't imagine going on 5 years, letalone forever.

lkpeaocck

With a mother like that, I can only imagine what their daughters will grow up to be like. If anything, your brother needs to step up and put the bitch in her place so his kids won't grow up thinking it's okay to belittle their SOs.