I like Gwen Stefani

FallinAgain

and her family is cute, but I find bleaching a 3 year old's haor, just wrong.http://www.people.com/people/gallery/0,,20311423,00.html

Novemberrocks

I agree with you on both counts.  She's one of my favorite celebs.

SarahBethBR

Eh, I think it's cute.  I guess I look at it like a fauxhawk or mohawk.  If he asked for it, why not. Of course, I have no idea what the bleaching process does to your hair or feels like.  If it burns like a perm does, then I probably wouldn't do it.

tastyburger

I like Gwen.  Agree about bleaching a 3 yo hair being wrong.  my mom used to get my hair permed when I was young (probably more like 10, not 3) and I think that was too young.  Call me old fashioned, it's just not appropriate.  Embrace naturalness when you are little and still cute, I say.  There will plenty of time for experimentation and trying to live up to societal ideals later.

FallinAgain

Is it even possible for a 3 year old to ask for dyed hair?  This is the rocker, boy version of the Toddlers and Tiaras set. 

SarahBethBR

I mean, I doubt he said, "I want you to bleach my hair."  But maybe he said he wanted his hair to be the color of his mom's, or something like that. I probably won't bleach my little boy's hair, but I don't think it's necessarily wrong.  When I'm a parent, my "treat kids like tiny people" plan will probably fly out the window though.

tastyburger

I fully plan on treating my kids as people.  People who need to learn to accept Mom's rules.  I'd be more than happy to explain the reasoning for them, but there is no choice than follow them when I am responsible for their safety/well being.

FallinAgain

Little kids aren't people, imo.  Hopefully, by the time they are teens, I will have instilled enough responsibility and respect that I can start treating them like people.  If my 14 yr old wanted platinum hair, sure.  My toddler doesn't get to have chemicals on his head to look like mom. 

CaliopeSpidrman

I've purchased my ticket for the "Not Okay" train.  I hope I get a window seat.If they had put in some temporary dye in a crazy color, I would be okay with it.  But bleaching really does a number on your hair.  I'm actually surprised Gwen has any hair left.  I also don't understand why celebrity kids never seem to walk on their own.  Their parents are always carrying them.  I imagine they all have underdeveloped leg muscles because of it.

FallinAgain

I'm guessing the not walking is b/c there's probably a swarm of papparazzi that we can't see.

wendyld

1) In public, a lot of kiddos do the "I'm shy, Mommy hold me" thing, so walking isn't always an option. If strange people are looking at or talking to Connor (as in the paparazzi in this case), he wants me to hold/carry him. 2) "When I'm a parent, my "treat kids like tiny people" plan will probably fly out the window though." I'm going to have to play the "You'll understand when you're a parent" card at this one. The problem with this plan (and I think you referenced this in feeding choices the other day as well) is the assumption that this "tiny person" is capable of making the right choices. They aren't. They don't understand the consequences and their brains aren't developed enough to choose what they need over what they want. 3 year olds want cookies for every meal and want to run in the street. The job of the parent is to make the right choices FOR them.

ftnups

Since I am a well known fuddy duddy, I obviously don't agree with bleaching a kid's hair. But mostly I wanted to get on fallin and wendy's Thomas the tank engine train and say that kids aren't "little people." I treat Matt like....a kid.

SarahBethBR

Wendy, you may be right.  Like I said, I've never dyed my hair, so I have no idea how it affects hair or heads.  I would obviously look into that and if I felt it was unhealthy for my kid to do it, I wouldn't let them.  I just don't see anything inherently wrong with it.  Maybe I'm overestimating the intelligence of a 3 year old, but his mom is a style icon and his parents are rock stars.  I get the desire to be like them.As for the food thing, I'm not saying I think kids should be allowed to eat whatever they want.  But I won't force my kids to eat something they have tried several times and proven they don't like.  There's got to be a happy medium between eating cookies all day and being forced to choke down something you hate.

FallinAgain

I don't buy that a 3 yr old has a vested interest in how he looks  I think they want their kids to look like little rockstars.  That's fine for rock t-shirts and crazy boots, even a spiked mohawk, but when you start making long term changes with chemicals or piercing, I think you've gone a step too far.

Vinny08

I like Gwen, but that looks like nothing more than making your accessories (your babies) match your outfit.  I don't dig it.That being said, my mom let me dye my hair when I wanted to.  I did purple...when I was in high school.  Not that I have much experience with 3 year olds yet, but I'm going to venture a guess and say this kid doesn't give a fark about his hair.

ftnups

Wait, where did the food thing come from? I think wendy was just making the point that if left to make their own decisions about things, kids wouldn't fare so well (and hence, they should be treated not as small versions of ourselves but as little kids who need a lot of direction). I don't think being reasonable about food likes and dislikes = treating kids like tiny people. And yeah, someone please stop me the day I let my son bleach his hair or pierce his nose because he says he likes it. I agree that this is more likely the parents creating a little rock star family image than anything else. Blech.

SarahBethBR

Fitty, that was from a previous discussion about kids and eating.  I don't remember exactly what I said, but it was along the lines of not forcing my kids to eat things they don't like. Also, I think dying hair and piercings are on totally different levels.

FallinAgain

I think they are much closer than a rock t-shirt or even a mohawk cut.

ftnups

Ah. I vaguely remember that conversation. I also don't agree with "eat this or you get nothing" dinner method, at least not for toddlers. Particularly with one who generally eats well and eats a good variety of foods. I suppose everyone would put hair dying and piercings at different places along the spectrum. My point was not meant to be a commentary on those things necessarily; more that I'm not of the mindset to simply allow my kids to do this or that just because they say they want to.

CaliopeSpidrman

I imagine someday I'll hear my three year old say, "Mommy, can I wear yoga pants everyday like you?"

KristenBtobe

I am on the fuddy duddy bus, coloring a 3 year old's hair is not my bag. At all. I don't think anyone said "eat this or you get nothing" in the toddler food conversation.

noisy_penguin

I used to bleach my hair. That shiit can burn. I can't imagine doing it to a three year old, regardless of what he wanted.

buddhagouda

How does one get a three year old to sit still long enough for hair bleaching?

FallinAgain

I wondered that too Buddha.  And not to touch it.

SarahBethBR

Like I said, I know nothing about hair dying or bleaching.  Other than my college roommate turned half my stuff purple on night on accident.  I equate it to cuts, but if it burns or hurts or is bad for you, then yeah, I wouldn't do it either.

salimoo

Yeeeaaaah, bleaching a 3 year old's hair? I'll sit primly on the old lady train, ankles crossed, handbag held firmly in my lap, with the rest of you.

ftnups

I don't think anyone said "eat this or you get nothing" in the toddler food conversation.Well again my memory of the post is vague (and I didn't post in it, I don't think?), so it wasn't a direct quote. So what was the gist of what SB remembers and didn't agree with?

KristenBtobe

I think you did, to brag about how good of an eater Matthew is. ;-) If it's the one I remember, Vinny and I were commiserating about the challenges of a toddler's whims when it comes to food interest. All I can say is Maggie is interested in veggies again, so I'm happy.  Still not so much sleeping.

SarahBethBR

I don't think anyone said "it's that or nothing."  Some people said something about not being a short order cook.  Or maybe I'm just remembering what my mom told me when I complained   Since Wendy brought it up, I was just saying I didn't plan on letting my kids eat cookies and candy all the time.When I say I'm planning on treating my kids like people, that's not to say I won't treat them like kids.  But I won't just make decisions for them without their input.  Don't feel like going to school today?  Sorry buddy, you're going.  Rather have broccoli than carrots for dinner?  That's okay with me.  And yes, as they get older, I will let them make decisions on some things.And no, I probably wouldn't bleach my three year old's hair.  I just don't think there's anything inherently wrong with it.

buddhagouda

[i]And no, I probably wouldn't bleach my three year old's hair. I just don't think there's anything inherently wrong with it.[/i] There may not be anything wrong with it, but I can't find anything right with it. Bleaching dark hair takes a long time, harsh chemicals, and generally burns your scalp. I'm still wondering how a three year old sits still for all that.

KristenBtobe

I did say that the book I read suggested you not be a short order cook, that your whole family should eat the same meal. They don't have to eat everything, but if we eat meatloaf, mashed potatoes, and corn, that's what Maggie gets served and if she only eats the potatoes, fine.  We eat together as a family at the table every night.My niece and nephew who are 5 and 7 still only want Campbell's noodles or peanut butter sandwiches or fast food and rarely eat what the rest of us do. I don't think that's a good way to go.