Business Trip: How Long is Too Long?

ExpatPumpkin

Sorry for being a PW today...  But I've got stuff on my mind!

How long is too long for a business trip?  I make a 7-10 day trip once every 5-6 weeks and it's hard to be away for that long but it's manageable. 

However, I have a trip from November 1st-12th.  That's the original plan.  But now they want me somewhere around the end of October.  So I'd have to leave on the 25th.  That's October 25th - November 12th:  Three weeks away from home.

Would that be too long for you and your FI/DH?

And a poll:

vegasgroom

That's pretty long, most places where travel is not a primary part of the job will not take you away longer than one week a month.  But in this economy its hard to complain.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

That would be too long for me.

kd.joseph

My DH has been gone up to 2 weeks most recently. Before they cut travel so much (economy) he had been overseas for as many as 3 weeks.

Come the end of the year, is when he travels the most. But 3 weeks is still a long time. But it's his job, so I deal.

kpwedkk

It really depends on what you do.  I've been away internationally for months at a time.

ExpatPumpkin

The problem is that it's "international."  The trips are in the States, but since I live out of the States, it's not so easy just to come home for the weekend. 

Right now we're in Mexico, and I would take a break during the three weeks and come home for at least a long weekend.  But we'll be living in the U.K. then and the flights are 12+ hours.  So I can't exactly go home for the weekend.

I don't want to leave DH in London alone for that long, but I also don't want to let down my company.  It's a family-run company and we're very good friends.  And they do need me for this.

kpwedkk

At least there are great things like cell phones, skype, email, instant message, and so on. 

I totally understand what your are going through, we are in that situation where there are several timezones between DH and I, but yet things get done, and time spent together is like a whirlwind of love at each meeting. 

K Byte

My H (boyfriend at the time) once went to Argentina for a month. It really sucked. He was gone basically the entire month of October THEN they made him go back again at the end of November for another week. >__< I didn't have any kind of business travel but he travels enough for the both of us I guess.

nda_roxybabe

I go on vacation at least once a year without T and typically for 5 days to a week. I always have a blast and don't get very homesick. However, on this trip I just got home from it was 1 week and for whatever reason I really, really missed him. I wouldn't want to do longer than 2 weeks.
I think part of my thing was spending my birthday without him. I had spent the past 4 birthdays with him and it just felt weird.

I find it easier when I leave. When he leaves me to go somewhere it sucks so much more because the house feels empty.

missy68

J's going to be gone for 8 days starting Saturday for a fun trip, and I'll be glad when he gets home. The first couple of days will be fine, but after that, I'll be moping around the house. He's in state, just riding in RAGBRAI, and it's too far north for him to come home for a night during the week.

ExpatPumpkin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_business-trip-long-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1e84e04b-4c5d-4fec-aa75-4fc1d0418b23Post:8c0b6188-f4ca-4c97-8d96-f886e33f5f76">Re: Business Trip: How Long is Too Long?</a>:
[QUOTE]I find it easier when I leave. When he leaves me to go somewhere it sucks so much more because the house feels empty.
Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]

This is the truth.  And I just feel bad about leaving him alone for so long in an empty apartment in London.  At least if we were here (Mexico) he'd have his friends and family around. 

I think I'm going to fly home for a long weekend anyway.

ehathewa

Does your company offer you compensation time? 

I often have to go on long business trips, work 16 hour days on weekends, etc.  If I spend 24 hours working on a weekend (think 2 12 hour days) then I get one day of comp time I can use within the next week or two.  It isn't much, but it something. 

ExpatPumpkin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_business-trip-long-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:1e84e04b-4c5d-4fec-aa75-4fc1d0418b23Post:a4f630f1-e2fc-40fe-a909-c799a5104412">Re: Business Trip: How Long is Too Long?</a>:
[QUOTE]Does your company offer you compensation time?  I often have to go on long business trips, work 16 hour days on weekends, etc.  If I spend 24 hours working on a weekend (think 2 12 hour days) then I get one day of comp time I can use within the next week or two.  It isn't much, but it something. 
Posted by ehathewa[/QUOTE]

No, we're not that structured.  Which is a good thing because I work from home and they're understanding about my living situation ;) 

luckyme502

My father and my ex-husband were both in the military, so I voted no limit.  They would be gone for up to two years at a stretch. 

FI was offered a job last month, he would have been traveling for three weeks and home for one week, repeat, repeat, repeat.  He turned it down because he hates traveling and didn't want to spend that much time away from us.  I didn't want him to take it, but I told him I would support whatever decision he made, and I would have. 

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

That's quite long. In my recollection, neither of my parents ever went on a business trip that was over a week. (My dad currently travels to NYC for a few days, twice a year, where his company is located and used to travel to DC once or twice a year. He travels a lot for his job, but just by car, and often spends a night or two away from home.) FI's business trips have always been under 5-6 days. The last one he went on was a Sunday-Wednesday and that was pretty long for him. Most of the conferences he goes to are only 2-3 days. Or he'll have to fly somewhere for a major meeting, so it will be 2 days away.

eastunder1

Mr Eastunder travels all the time for business.  Sometimes I travel with him if my schedule permits, but usually not.  It is nothing for him to be gone 4-5 days at a time.  I don't bat an eye at that.  There are a few trips a year where he is gone for two weeks.  Again, I don't really bat an eye because hey, life happens.  Two weeks is where I draw the line at being a happy camper though. 

flyjawn

at the busiest times in his career, my SO travelled up to 25 days a month.  it's hell and i would fly out to meet him in between or we'd both fly to somewhere in the middle, etc just so we'd see each other at least once every 10 days or so.

in the end it was all worth it though.  i guess that's the real question - is it worth it in the long run to make these sacrifices?

catemeg

I travel a lot for work - often one week or a few days more.  I go all around the world, and since they are financial business conferences, I'm usually one of very few women based on the demographics of the industry.

My boyfriend is in the Marines, so he's already done Officer Candidate School, which had him gone for 10 weeks without any form of communication except hand written letters.  He's likely to be gone quite often throughout his career for varying lengths of time, though I'm lucky with his specialty (he's going to be a JAG - aka military lawyer) he will probably only deploy once and for 4-6 months.

We have had to get used to being apart, and it's a constant work in progress as we'd obviously prefer to be together.  When it's for longer than 2-3 days, we miss each other like crazy, but we really enjoy the reinvigorating that occurs when we are back together.  Missing each other helps us refresh our relationship each and every time one of us takes a trip, and we really value every day that we have together.  Little things like waking up in his arms can just make my whole day better.

So there's no maximum length of business trip.  I think in a normal (aka non-military) situation, a week business trip is long enough.  Two weeks once or twice a year would be fine.  It depends more on the frequency of the trip than the length.

EDIT: If there are kids at home, I think a week is long enough.  BF knows that I want him to get his deployment (since he'll likely only have one) out of the way before we start a family.