CN: I was looking forward to spending some grown up hang out time with my BFF this weekend, but now she wants to change plans so her 12 year old daughter can be there because she wants to see me too (I just saw daughter 3 weeks ago). I love her daughter, but I was looking forward to some alone time with BFF, so I lied and told her I couldn't do the day with her daughter.
Long version: Let me start by saying I love my BFF (let's call her Jen) and her daughter (Mary). Jen was my MOH, threw my bridal shower and is throwing me a baby shower. I love Mary too like she is family. She did a reading in my wedding and is an awesome kid, and mature for her age. Jen is divorced and her and ex share custody, and Jen has Mary Saturdays and Sundays. She lives where my family's vacation house is about an hour and a half away, so they will come up once or twice for a weekend during the winter, and I see them a lot during the summer. Since we are usually there weekends, Mary is usually there when we see each other.
Jen messaged me and asked if we were coming down this weekend, and that she was free Friday night, and would have Mary Sat-Sun. I messaged back and said we would be there, and asked if she wanted to meet for dinner Friday night. I was looking forward to some adult fun with Jen, because obviously we are somewhat limited when she has Mary.
She replied back and asked if we could do Satuday instead, eating takeout from a nearby place, and then playing games at my place because "Mary wants to see me". First of all, the house has to be worked n before it is livable for the summer (patio furniture has to be moved out, major, major cleanup, etc.) To do this, H & I would have to spend all night Friday getting it ready for Saturday. Never mind that the lawn has a foot of weeds to be addressed. As for games, we were not planning to bring down the flatscreen and Wii for the weekend (which we have done before for vacations). Second, and this is selfish, I wanted to see her, not Mary. I love Mary, but she is a 12 year old girl, with all that goes with it (short attention span ("I'm borrreeddd!"), some whining and moping if things don't go her way, etc.). I wanted to just hang without having to censor my conversation and plan around a kid being there, KWIM?
So I said Saturday night wouldn't work because H & I have dinner reservations (not really true). She asks about Saturday day, and I told her we had to work on the house (which is true). So now she is kind of pissed at me. I feel bad, but a little annoyed and aggravated. As a side note, she is throwing my shower later than I would have preferred (36 weeks) so Mary can be there (she be with Dad the two previos weekends). It leaves us very little time for getting everything ready, but I was so grateful that she was doing this for me I didn't say anything.
So am I an ungrateful beyotch? Should I suck it up and go nuts Friday night getting the house ready so we can hang out Saturday and put up with Mary? Thanks for anyone that read this whole thing, and if I am being a beyotch, flame away.
