To move or not to move...

Knottie1457463875

I need some advise.  My family is mostly up North or overseas, but my parents are here.  Everyone has kids including my fiance.  We originally decided on October 2013 but my family is throwing a fit because of having to take their kids out of school.  Now my FI is jumping on that bandwagon.  I dont want a Christmas themed wedding but that is when everyone in my family was 'hoping' we would pick the dates for.  Suggestions?  I want my family here but darn it Im the baby of a large family and I plan on only getting married once.  Thanks and happy planning!!

cwaggoner07

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_to-move-or-not-to-move?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:102Discussion:0bde5a84-0d8a-4589-904e-db13fe5fe11bPost:23ef9993-97b4-4832-813c-2874be5c4c39">To move or not to move...</a>:
[QUOTE]I need some advise.  My family is mostly up North or overseas, but my parents are here.  Everyone has kids including my fiance.  We originally decided on October 2013 but my family is throwing a fit because of having to take their kids out of school.  Now my FI is jumping on that bandwagon.  I dont want a Christmas themed wedding but that is when everyone in my family was 'hoping' we would pick the dates for.  Suggestions?  I want my family here but<strong> darn it Im the baby of a large family and I plan on only getting married once.  </strong>Thanks and happy planning!!
Posted by jennifermiller813[/QUOTE]

This kind of comes across as selfish, in my opinion. You really need to think of what's going to be best for everyone. If you go through with the October wedding, you have to come to grips that some people just may not show up.
And a December wedding doesn't have to be Christmas-themed. I got married on July 14 and it wasn't Independence Day-themed.
I think you need to step back and look at what is important. Is it having this October date? Or making sure all of your family that is traveling from thousands of miles away is accomodated and in attendance?

AshJohnson30

I agree with PP. figure out what's most important the family or the date and make sure you and FI are on the same page. like she said just cause its near Christmas it doesn't have to be Christmas themed. good luck!

nextrightthing

We are getting married on December 14 and it won't be Christmas themed. 

If you don't want to accommodate families, it is okay to elope or have a very small destination wedding.  Otherwise, although it is your wedding day, you kind of have to accommodate your family. 

ktwed1

I have to agree as well. All of our guests are traveling and to save my family $$ we are having our wedding June 14, 2013 to accomadate my daughter's high school graduation. My parents won't travel to Dallas twice in the same year and we talked them into coming for my daughter's graduation before my FI even proposed. So my daughter, myself, and FI decided to share the weekend. We are getting married on Friday night and having my daughter's graduation party Saturday night. I did not want my parents to pick the wedding over my daughter's graduation and it's going to save my whole family time and money.

roseofdeborah

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_to-move-or-not-to-move?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:0bde5a84-0d8a-4589-904e-db13fe5fe11bPost:09d35932-0e04-4915-9a9a-8e1fa658b74a">Re: To move or not to move...</a>:
[QUOTE]I have to agree as well. All of our guests are traveling and to save my family $$ we are having our wedding June 14, 2013 to accomadate my daughter's high school graduation. My parents won't travel to Dallas twice in the same year and we talked them into coming for my daughter's graduation before my FI even proposed. So my daughter, myself, and FI decided to share the weekend. We are getting married on Friday night and having my daughter's graduation party Saturday night. I did not want my parents to pick the wedding over my daughter's graduation and it's going to save my whole family time and money.
Posted by ktwed1[/QUOTE]

Wow, this is really a good idea. Also, it's really nice that all of you were able to come together to decide something you all agreed on.

courtski2004

Many members of my family are teachers or have children in school, so we decided that it would be best to accomodate those important guests by scheduling our wedding not long after school let out for summer break. We were looking at other dates that held great significance to us, but those dates would have inconvenienced our guests.

If these family members are that important to you, I think accomodating them when it comes to the date is least you can do if they are going to great lengths to attend. How long has it been since your family was together close to the holidays? You can have a wedding themed wedding and a Christmas themed Christmas. Then, darn it, everybody gets their way.

fallbride1109

Why not move the wedding up a month or two and do a summer wedding so that everyone's kids are out of school?

You can certainly have your wedding whenever you want--but you'll need to accept the fact that some of your family members may choose not to come.  On the other hand, you don't have to have your wedding in December just because it's convenient for everyone else.  Just realize that you may not see them at the holidays because it's too close to the wedding.

Knottie1457463875

Thanks everyone!  I was just having a moment of panic becasuse we had already picked a locaiton but not put a deposit down, picked a theme and started planning decor for that venue.  I think i will move it to Christmas so that everyone will be more likely to come.  Things have just not been as I had envisioned from when I was a little girl but those were just dreams not a reality.  I know it will be beautiful and we will spend Christmas with my huge family but with little presents hahaha.  I just want to marry the love of my life and live hapily ever after

cwaggoner07

That's a great attitude to have! And we had to make sacrifices for our wedding, too, since we had such a short engagement. But you couldn't have told me on our wedding day that we made any sacrifices. It was perfect! And yours will be, too. Because it's yours.

professorscience

Personally I feel like whatever date you pick, people are going to have conflicts.  If someone I knew was getting married around Christmas, unless it was family, I probably wouldn't make it.  I think it's great that you're trying to accommodate your family and friends, but at some point you just have to accept that you can't please everyone.  I understand if we're talking about a LOT of family members with children, because I know how far behind kids can get if they miss even one day...