Stressed, Please Help

AimeeRab

I've spent almost every weekend since I started seriously planning my wedding (about 6 months) planning, crafting, dieting and meeting people. Don't get me wrong, I like to plan. But I have reached the point where anything purple (my wedding color) makes me cringe a little inside. It used to be my favorite color.

The smell of bread makes whistful for days sans-diet long past. I'm always hungry. My mom is always calling, trying to remind me of more things to do. I love her for it, but she really does think I'm still 4 years old sometimes. It's a Mom's, perrogative, I know. We both wish we lived closer. On the other hand, I had to threaten to hide the PS3 power cord in order to get my fiance to help me stuff and address the save the dates envelopes. I know, not the best thing I could have done, but I was desperate for help with the sea of envelopes that was taking over my home office. My hand was cramping so bad.

Any tips for de-stressing? Better non-depriving diets? (I also excercise.)

misssunshine17

Okay, I think you really need to slow your roll. This should be fun. Cringing at the color purple is a red flag. I suggest taking a week off- no wedding anything. Remind your FI that this is also his wedding and you need help. 

I would re-think so much DIY. At the end of the day, anything more than you, your FI, the legal documents and the officient are extra. You don't need centerpieces and favors. If it's bothering you this much, it's overkill. 

And as for the diet- fuuck that. Eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full. Don't cut anything out. Watch the terrible J. Lo movie "Monster in Law"... the dress fits you, not you fit the dress. 

anna.oskar

If you're hungry all the time... you're doing it wrong.  EAT.  Just don't eat crap.  Deprivation is a sure way to make you break and binge when you do get a chance.

I second the pp.  Come on over to GIS.  We'll set you on a good path.

http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_getting-shape

AimeeRab

Actually, we had to send the STDs out late. The big day is in April 2013. Suffice it to say Hurricane Issac caused this massive chain reaction which threw everything off, and before that I was taking the time suck that was the Louisiana Bar Examination (which I passed ). Don't worry, everyone on my side got a personal call with the date at about 7 months out, and my parents tell everyone on the face of the earth every chance they get. I told my fiance he would have to make calls to his people. I doubt that happened, but it would have been weird for me to call up people I'd never even met. We're just getting down to the wire, and I thought I'd have more done. This April date was a huge compromise for me. My fiance's and his family believe in quick weddings. However, my big Italian family does not.

And yeah, I need to quit worrying about the dress thing. There were just a few comments about my arms from someone at my last fitting. My future mother in law says whatyever is on her mind. I don't think she meant to hurt me, but if she's thinking it, everyone else will too. 

AdeleDazeem

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_stressed-please-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4c937671-b70d-4dbd-aa58-de0e8dbc7e40Post:12c09c9a-88fe-4b54-9466-833e70bfc0e8">Stressed, Please Help</a>:
[QUOTE]I've spent almost every weekend since I started seriously planning my wedding (about 6 months) planning, crafting, dieting and meeting people. Don't get me wrong, I like to plan. But I have reached the point where anything purple (my wedding color) makes me cringe a little inside. It used to be my favorite color. The smell of bread makes whistful for days sans-diet long past. I'm always hungry. My mom is always calling, trying to remind me of more things to do. I love her for it, but she really does think I'm still 4 years old sometimes. It's a Mom's, perrogative, I know. We both wish we lived closer. On the other hand, I had to threaten to hide the PS3 power cord in order to get my fiance to help me stuff and address the save the dates envelopes. I know, not the best thing I could have done, but I was desperate for help with the sea of envelopes that was taking over my home office. My hand was cramping so bad. Any tips for de-stressing? Better non-depriving diets? (I also excercise.)
Posted by AimeeRab[/QUOTE]

Honestly - eat.  Just friggin' eat.  You don't need to be a runway model for your fiance.  He's marrying YOU.  The YOU you were before you got engaged.  There's nothing wrong with that YOU.  So, go eat.  Seriously.

AimeeRab

Hahaha... WP is so not in the budget! But it was a great suggestion.

achiduck

1) Eat. Your FI proposed to you just as you are/were. He loves you and 10 lbs isn't going to change that. Plus all brides look beautiful no matter what size they are.

2) By my count you have 5-6 months to go. At that time I didn't have anything WR to do other the gather addresses and work with the invitation designer. Seriously, you're over thinking this.

3) If your mom is a souce of stress, tell her to shut up. But you know, in a polite way.

B2Z728

Please eat. 

I'm a proponent of the low carb diet if it works for you, but you should not be hungry. Eat more protein and vegetables, but don't eat the processed stuff. If you want to stay with a low carb diet, try the South Beach version rather something more extreme like Atkins. You work good carbs back into your diet slowly and you learn to eat what's right for you. After a month if your diet isn't working for you, wether you're just unhappy with it hunger-wise, result-wise, emotionally, or other reasons, switch to a different plan. The key is to not diet, but adjust to a new lifestyle of eating healthy for life. More importantly, your fiance is marrying you for you. If you're happy with how you look, your fiance will be too. 

6 months out from your wedding is a long time. PP's are right, if you have all your vendors booked, you can take a breather for awhile. Enjoy the holidays and have some fun. If you're prone to stress, don't take on too much DIY and spread out the projects over the next 6 months. Prioritise what you think is the most important vs what you won't be upset about if they don't get done. There were a few things that I wasn't able to finish in time and I'm positive that I'm the only one who knew - and day of I didn't miss them at all. 

Be honest with your mother. If she is stressing you out when she calls so often about things for the wedding, nicely let her know that you need a break from the wedding planning and talk about other things. 

This is easier said than done because I struggled with a lot of unnecessary wedding stress. But try to remember it's one day. At the end of that day you will be married to your husband and that's all that matters. It's not worth months of stress. 

tiny speck

Everyone has given you great advice, but I just wanted to add that if you are dieting because you are self-conscious about your arms (which you mentioned), dieting and even cardio exercise is not really going to change them. You can try toning them up with some weight lifting (light weights, lots of reps). But the most important advice is still, I think, that you should not be feeling hungry all the time. Take care of yourself physically, and you will very likely also be able to handle the mental and emotional stress better.

lily_721

People do not remember the things that brides stress about.  Of all my well-planned apps, I remember none of them.  I have forgotten one of my cake flavorings.  My sister recently told me that she thought the chicken meal with delicious -- we didn't have chicken.

DIY projects can get extremely overwhelming and completely not worth the stress/anxiety of them.  Give yourself some time off for wedding work. 

I remember our band, my DH, flower children's excitement, and the happiness of my stepsons.  I don't remember the playlist, the signature drink, the card basket, the programs or menues.

kekbug3

I completely get what you are saying. I have a little less than 6 months to go and I am completely stressed out as well. I know this seems impossible when you are completely stressed out about table linens and flowers, but I am trying to keep things in perspective and let go of the small stuff. I remind myself that its the marriage and not the wedding day that really matters.

As far as the dieting, keep going to the gym! Exercise is a great stress buster! Also, keep eating! It will keep you happy and healthy because we all get a little mean when we are hungry! Focus on eating fruits and veggies at every meal, along with lean protein and carbs in moderation.