Snarky Brides
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Hey, why don't I just invite myself to my ex-boyfriend's wedding?

Ok, so my fiance has a best friend, Mickey, who lives across the street. We're inviting him, his parents, his brother and his niece to the wedding because both of us get along so well with the entire family.

Mickey has a cousin (Carolina) who used to kinda sorta date my fiance, years ago. I've met her a few times, and never had any problems with her. She seemed nice enough.

When we wrote up the guestlist, Carolina's name never even popped up. I think my fiance even considers her more of an acquaintance than a friend, and we even had to leave some closer friends of the list because there just wasn't space.

The other day, fiance calls me and says that his Mickey's mom (Diana) told him "My niece is confused because you didn't invite her to the wedding." Since I really like Diana, and I didn't want her to be offended, and her niece doesn't really bother me anyway, I said sure, we can invite Carolina.

The next day, we found out that Carolina had actually INSISTED that Diana ask us for an invitation (I thought she'd just mentioned to her aunt Diana that she was surprised not to get one or something.) THIS really pissed my fiance and me off.

Fiance saw Carolina today, and she actually said to his face she was pissed she didn't get an invitation before. He explained that he didn't want to invite her originally because they have a bit of a history and he didn't want it to be weird for me.

She's still coming anyway.

GAAAH!!

Sorry, just had to vent to somebody!!!

Now I totally understand why some brides go all Bridezilla. With multiple people inviting themselves to my wedding, I'm about to go over the edge.
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Re: Hey, why don't I just invite myself to my ex-boyfriend's wedding?

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    It's okay to say no.  We did that a whole bunch of times.
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    People are rude. I never really understood how rude until we started getting the "are you going to invite me?" question. You'll learn pretty quickly how to start saying no. If you don't, you'll end up with a quest list of 500.
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    leaynleayn member
    First Comment
    You actually invited her though.  You should have just given the same reason you gave here and said that you could not accommodate her.
    BabyFruit Ticker
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hey-dont-just-invite-myself-ex-boyfriends-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:5ac8f6bf-ed3c-4ef2-a2a6-30dce7b1e192Post:d2c7cbd6-0f45-4a06-9359-7c337289d514">Re: Hey, why don't I just invite myself to my ex-boyfriend's wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]You actually invited her though.  You should have just given the same reason you gave here and said that you could not accommodate her.
    Posted by leayn[/QUOTE]

    I know, I feel like such an idiot. I originally thought it was just as a favor to her aunt... we didn't think she'd actually thrown a fit about it until later. Kicking myself now.
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    leaynleayn member
    First Comment

    It does suck when you're trying to be nice about something only to find out the person you are doing it for was an asswhore about it.  I have been in similar situations and it just ate me up!

    BabyFruit Ticker
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    Just don't include "Is there anyone who objects to this union" in the ceremony and you should be good.
    Honestly, if I went to a wedding and saw the groom's ex there I would think "How classy of the couple to include his ex with her family, and how desperate is his ex that she would want to go to his wedding?"
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    Well... you won't make that mistake again lol
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    wow, thats weird why shes want to come to an ex;s wedding.......i had a similar situation fi's ex wife was trying to get one oftheir old mutual friends to bring her as a plus one because shewas pissed we didnt invite her :S:S i said no F*cking way....im seriosuly considering hiring bouncers incase she shows up...ok maybe not but still....
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    I couldn't tell from your post if the actual paper invite had gone out or not.  If it hasn't, you can still not invite her.  Does her aunt know that she and your fiance used to date?  I can't imagine her not understanding why that would make you uncomfortable. 
    Regardless, it's your wedding, you don't have to invite anyone you don't want to.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_hey-dont-just-invite-myself-ex-boyfriends-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:5ac8f6bf-ed3c-4ef2-a2a6-30dce7b1e192Post:e75c3580-e3a8-4c35-b84a-56d2634b8c2b">Re: Hey, why don't I just invite myself to my ex-boyfriend's wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I couldn't tell from your post if the actual paper invite had gone out or not.  If it hasn't, you can still not invite her.  Does her aunt know that she and your fiance used to date?  I can't imagine her not understanding why that would make you uncomfortable.  Regardless, it's your wedding, you don't have to invite anyone you don't want to.
    Posted by 526SadieSadie[/QUOTE]

    We're including her in her aunt's invitation. It's not the fact that they used to date that bothers me though, it's the way she made us feel super guilty (twice) and used her aunt to get her invite.

    Fiance already told her that he didn't invite her bc they used to date and he didn't want me to be uncomfortable (his decision, not mine), and she didn't take the hint. If we dropped her at this point, I would look like a jealous bitch :S
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    I'd be fine with a "jealous bitch" role.  I say don't invite her.  She sounds like a douch.
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