joint facebook accounts

tidetravel

Barb - YGPM

barbbhoww

tide-sent you a friend request!

erins87

I thought it was weird until I found out that my future IL's had a joint one but their case is special.  They do a joint account since they live in Bangladesh and are only able to fb on a dial up computer on a very infrequent basis.

MeaghanandMichael

I judge people who think temptation stems from facebook and can also be controlled by facebook.
That is the biggest crock of horseshit I have ever heard of.

Meaghann17

i also find it strange, but we then recently considered it. FI is in a department at work that has requested emplyoees not use FB. It is strange bc its only his department and not others but I guess different people are in charge. The reason he wanted to have a joint account was to get around the rule, as friends and people at work in other departments were sending out info he wanted/needed i.e. his pickup hockey league sign up or football pools are mostly ran on facebook now.

so he wanted to be sure he was doing everything with his buddies still (once he was late with some picks and actually lost $20 bucks lol- he would have won the week). instead he just tells people to add me. and he actually never goes on anyway. I've ended up telling him when he has hockey or when someone is trying to contact him lol.

in any case I have seen a couple sharing it they have been extremely religious or elderly and it does generally seem to be the woman who is doing the facebooking. in the case of religious people not wanting to be tempted, if one of them felt like it they could easily create an individual facebook account without the other knowing it. i guess they would also share cell phones etc for the same reasoning?

alehayes

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_joint-facebook-accounts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:857c0fca-6354-432e-adc6-e166930c4887Post:abe817ac-7aba-438b-b49a-fcbc9982471d">Re: joint facebook accounts</a>:
[QUOTE]I think joint FB pages/e-mail accounts are weird for people in our age group.  (FI and I both have our own FB pages and e-mails established.  I'm not going to create a whole new FB page and re-friend everyone just so it is a joint one). I don't think joint e-mail is so weird for my parents or other people in their age group.  They've shared the same e-mail address for years and I think they created it way back in the day when we had dial up AOL.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

I think it makes more sense for your parents, especially when they've had the same email for a decade.  One of the couples I know who has a joint FB account is in their late 30s/early 40s, but another couple on my friends list is a girl who was in my class from 1st-3rd grade and her husband.  WE'RE TWENTY-TWO, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

missy68

I think I only know of one joint account - apparently it isn't checked very often, either. They went to high school with me, got married soon after, and have been married ever since. I think they have like 4 kids, maybe one in college.

My mom and dad have separate accounts, my brother has one but SIL does not. Even weirder, my husband finally created one and I'd added several of his cycling buddies so I sent them to him as suggestions. Oh the weird part - his sister and nephew and sister's new husband all have FB, and none of them have requested him, nor has he requested them. Sis is 47, and her profile pic is from high school...
I have: mom, dad, brother, 4 cousins, and  2 aunts.

Meaghann17

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_joint-facebook-accounts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:857c0fca-6354-432e-adc6-e166930c4887Post:e9ce663d-5eb7-453d-ac39-9ff960c98fe3">Re: joint facebook accounts</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: joint facebook accounts : I think it makes more sense for your parents, especially when they've had the same email for a decade.  One of the couples I know who has a joint FB account is in their late 30s/early 40s, but another couple on my friends list is a girl who was in my class from 1st-3rd grade and her husband.  WE'RE TWENTY-TWO, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
Posted by alehayes[/QUOTE]


definately agree that is odd! when my parents got email, it was right when email became mainstream. we had 1 family computer and a slow dialup connection... they used it together mostly to stay in touch with family. as time went on my dad got one at work but they still use the joint one for emailing family/friends and such.

for people of our generation, most of us have had emails of our own for ages! i could see consolodating into one after many years esp if one person wasn't using it themselves often.. but even for us now,people who are contacting "us" email me anyway.  or cc both of us.

alehayes

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_joint-facebook-accounts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:857c0fca-6354-432e-adc6-e166930c4887Post:e312a948-f7b9-4e0d-a80d-c35917bdd283">Re: joint facebook accounts</a>:
[QUOTE]I think I only know of one joint account - apparently it isn't checked very often, either. They went to high school with me, got married soon after, and have been married ever since. I think they have like 4 kids, maybe one in college. My mom and dad have separate accounts, my brother has one but SIL does not. Even weirder, my husband finally created one and I'd added several of his cycling buddies so I sent them to him as suggestions. <strong>Oh the weird part - his sister and nephew and sister's new husband all have FB, and none of them have requested him, nor has he requested them.</strong> Sis is 47, and her profile pic is from high school... I have: mom, dad, brother, 4 cousins, and  2 aunts.
Posted by missy68[/QUOTE]

FI is not friends with ANY of his family members, and all his sibs, nieces and nephews have one.  He says he doesn't think they need to know everything about his life.  And I can see his point, as it's a valid one.

I, on the other hand, am friends with pretty much my entire family on FB.  Parents, sibs, aunts, uncles, cousins, second cousins, third cousins, great-aunts, great-uncles, etc.  Ridiculous, I know.  But I guess, like cew, that I'm a FB whore (and she says I'm a bigger one, so I guess I get to be the whore of the day or something.  I think someone needs to give me a tiara and I should get to make a speech where I firstly want to thank God, and then my family for always believing in me.  All the while fake crying, of course.)

ms_teach

But if I can't access FI's facebook account, how am I supposed to know when he's cheating on me with all of his ex girlfriends?

dazed2confused

i have never seen this...wow.  Is it that common the DH cheats through fb that u have to have only one account?  Have some trust people.

katiewhompus

I have most of my relatives on facebook because if I didn't add everyone they would get all uppity. The ones I actually talk to have full access to my account info, the others have limited access.
I need to set up a joint account for us for bill payment. I do all of it so I just put everything under my old one, but I get strange looks when I give my email after my name (I changed to his last name but the email is my maiden name). He also doesn't like to go into "my email" when I ask him to check on a bill payment if I'm away from home so that way he wouldn't feel as weird. He once said it was like going through my purse, he just doesn't belong there (ok weirdo).
Scott doesn't even have a FB account so if anyone wants to talk to him they just send me a message to pass on.

vegasgroom

I think people that share facebook or email accounts are weird.

As far as FB friends, I'm in the minority and only accept friend requests from people I'm really friends with; i.e. not friends of friends I've met once, not a friend's boyfriend or girlfriend they've been dating for a few weeks, not co-workers I don't hang out with outside of work, not family I don't get along with, not the guy in high school I never talked to, etc.  I have my profile locked down and like to be able to post things that I would not want people who aren't friends in real life seeing.  FI did make me accept a friend request from one of her college friends who has invited us to their wedding because it would be rude for me to not be friends with this girl if we're being invited to he wedding.  I'll just defriend her afterward LOL. I've literally met the girl once for about five minutes eight months ago.

Here's something new to add to the thread though; are you facebook 'friends' with your FI or spouse?  I'm not, so my profile just says "is engaged" but not to whom lol.  We have a number of mutual FB friends as a result of several of her friends becoming real life friends with me, since I'd have ignored them otherwise, so it's not like I'm hiding anything or don't want her to see what's posted on my wall since they'd all see it anyway.  I think originally it was something along the lines of people starting to ask us right after we started dating "Why aren't you friends on FB, are you guys not serious?" and I was thinking to myself are you kidding me, you're basing the status of our relationship on whether we're facebook friends?  Then as time went on those questions turned into things like "Oh, I thought you guys were fighting because I noticed you're not FB friends." when they assume we must have defriended each other or something.  So at this point it's just kind of a running joke that we're not friends because of how entertaining it is to see the stupid things people say based on that fact.  The facebook episode of southpark is a good example of this, if anyone on here watches that, which might just be me. LOL

alehayes

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_joint-facebook-accounts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:857c0fca-6354-432e-adc6-e166930c4887Post:74530045-8b3d-4de7-b91e-17f9305cd977">Re: joint facebook accounts</a>:
[QUOTE]Here's something new to add to the thread though; are you facebook 'friends' with your FI or spouse?  I'm not, so my profile just says "is engaged" but not to whom lol.  We have a number of mutual FB friends as a result of several of her friends becoming real life friends with me, since I'd have ignored them otherwise, so it's not like I'm hiding anything or don't want her to see what's posted on my wall since they'd all see it anyway. <strong> I think originally it was something along the lines of people starting to ask us right after we started dating "Why aren't you friends on FB, are you guys not serious?" and I was thinking to myself are you kidding me, you're basing the status of our relationship on whether we're facebook friends? </strong> Then as time went on those questions turned into things like "Oh, I thought you guys were fighting because I noticed you're not FB friends." when they assume we must have defriended each other or something.  So at this point it's just kind of a running joke that we're not friends because of how entertaining it is to see the stupid things people say based on that fact.  The facebook episode of southpark is a good example of this, if anyone on here watches that, which might just be me. LOL
Posted by vegasgroom[/QUOTE]

Dude, I so get this.  In my circle of friends, for YEARS, relationships aren't really considedred truly official until they're FACEBOOK official.  Which is ridiculous.

Like, when FI and I first started talking to each other, and were planning our first date, my MOH was like "Hey, maybe by the end of the night you'll be FB official!"  (we were, but still...)

My parents actually found out about our relationship via becoming "FB official".  And it sparked them to talk to each other.  Which I can honestly say I don't think has happened in at least eight years.

I AM friends with FI on FB (well, obviously.  I guess  that's kind of redundant).  I am also friends with his closest friends (who I've become friends with as well), one of his best friends' girlfriend (LOVE her!  She added me before we even met, because she said I sounded cool) and FI's youngest niece (who I absolutely adore...I'm asking her to be in the WP).

And, for the record, almost all of my FB friends ARE people I know in real life.  Not all of them are people I'm necessarily really good friends with, but they're all people I've gone to school with or worked with, with a few local celebrities tossed into the mix.

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_joint-facebook-accounts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:857c0fca-6354-432e-adc6-e166930c4887Post:74530045-8b3d-4de7-b91e-17f9305cd977">Re: joint facebook accounts</a>:
[QUOTE] I think originally it was something along the lines of people starting to ask us right after we started dating "Why aren't you friends on FB, are you guys not serious?" and I was thinking to myself are you kidding me, you're basing the status of our relationship on whether we're facebook friends?  Then as time went on those questions turned into things like "Oh, I thought you guys were fighting because I noticed you're not FB friends." when they assume we must have defriended each other or something.  So at this point it's just kind of a running joke that we're not friends because of how entertaining it is to see the stupid things people say based on that fact.  The facebook episode of southpark is a good example of this, if anyone on here watches that, which might just be me. LOL
Posted by vegasgroom[/QUOTE]

That's how it was back when everyone I knew had myspace, lol.

And now with fb, I didn't even bothering filling anything out for my profile. Leave it to his friend to let my bf (who doesn't use fb) know that I don't have a relationship status set up. My fb clueless bf calls me up and asks why my fb relationship status says, "single." I informed him, it doesn't say single, it doesn't say anythng I didn't fill it out. He wanted to know why and ws all hurt, assuming I would certainly have filled THAT part out. I told him I hadn't filled any part out. Oh it went on and on for about 30 minutes until I was, like, FINE I filled it out, it's not a big deal! Then he got annoyed with me for filling it out because it wasn't what i wanted. I give up, lol.

Oh, that South park episode is Ah May Zing!


And to answer the original question, yes, I think it's very weird to have a joint account, especially if there is a lame reason like "temptation." 

OH! I would be so not happy with a "no facebook" rule. People use it to keep in contact with friends and family and other personal reasons. That rule seems very facist to me, is all.

Steph0871

Wait! I want to be a FB whore too

Anyone want to be my friend?

sabatron

Just because you're married doesn't mean you have to share EVERYTHING... ::GAG::

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_joint-facebook-accounts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:857c0fca-6354-432e-adc6-e166930c4887Post:248eef3c-25a9-4611-8259-5321985e71bb">Re: joint facebook accounts</a>:
[QUOTE]I've seen it a lot in really religious couples.  <strong>They tell me it is so that they can remain faithful and not be tempted in their relationship</strong>. I find them strange, too.
Posted by barbbhoww[/QUOTE]

HAHAHAHAHAHA
I'm sorry but it sounds like it's a poor excuse for "I don't trust my spouse". You don't need a joint anything to help youremain faithful - you need to not be a selfish jerk that cheats.

I know it's not YOU saying that so don't take offense to my rude comment.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_joint-facebook-accounts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:857c0fca-6354-432e-adc6-e166930c4887Post:40aba5a2-072a-4c8c-b75e-57b0d7a9d8dc">Re: joint facebook accounts</a>:
[QUOTE]But if I can't access FI's facebook account, how am I supposed to know when he's cheating on me with all of his ex girlfriends?
Posted by ms_teach[/QUOTE]

Since we're on the topic of facebook I was looking for a "like" botton. =)

arffy916

My FI and I both have our own individual accounts plus a joint account... it's really only because of the apps for us cause we are obsessed and other family as well sadly.  He even has two other individual accounts for his businesses too.

stephdonjon

Ha! What? This actually happens? I have yet to see it. Guess my friends are normal. :P

alehayes

Woah.  Just saw that this is a "Hot Topic".  Blew my mind.

deb84

I also find the joint facebook accounts strange.  One of my best friends from high school has one and her and her husband both use it a lot.  I'm not trying to keep secrets from him or anything but I hate that he can read every single message I send her.  So much so I do not communicate with her through facebook anymore.  IDGI

But I can top joint facebook accounts.  One of my "facebook friends" recently had a baby.  About a week after the baby was born I got a friend request to be her (THE BABY's) friend.  The crazy mother created a facebook account in her infant child's name.  I did NOT accept the friendship but I have heard from other friends that she even updates the status.  "baby LastName is really cranky because I am getting teeth".  This should be illegal.

riverjib

Creepy!!! I only know one couple who does this. Then again, it's a guy my sister dated in high school and he was insecure and possessive to an extent that bordered on stalking.

Symbolically, you're joined together as one. That doesn't eradicate your identity as an individual person. It's not like you're assigned a hybrid social security number!

trachael921

i think the sharing is dumb, if there is question of faithfulness maybe the couple shouldn't get married. only voicing my opinion.

aprovencher21

I'll be a FB whore as well....love new friends.  Plus I'm on facebook more than the knot.  Which is distinctly saying something.

kitkatherine

I'd like to think it's "my husband won't get a facebook account but I want him to so I will just add him to mine" thing.

I've never heard it was a religoius thing though

talpins101511

In some cases, maybe one half of the couple couldn't care less about having an account, but they still want both sides families to be able to keep in touch through it.

Not everyone is *into* it.

brintae

Uh...that's reeeeeeeeeally possessive and almost stalkery of whoever is managing the fb.

mary9449

I think it is EXTREMELY weird! FI and I have a joint e-mail account, however, it is only for wedding related material and we have kept our seperate accounts as well.