My friend, let's call her F, and I were talking on the phone the other day about both of our weddings and the planning. When her and her fiance got engaged a couple of years ago, she asked me to be her MOH, and then asked me to plan an engagement party for them. I was so excited for her and said that of course, I would love to! I am good friends with both of them and was so excited to see them get married! Due to time contsraints, the engagement party never happened.
Flash forward a couple of months, another friend, S, and I all went out to lunch to have some girl bonding time and then look at dresses for F. The shop we were at asked who the MOH was and F replied, "AST is, unless she is too busy and too far away to help with anything." This left me a little speechless, but this is F's personality and I kind of just went with it and brushed it off.
Now, two years later, after my FI and I got engaged, F and her FI finally set a day. Yay! So excited for them! F, her sister, and S all went dress shopping (I would have gone, but I am 8 hours away). It was that night that we talked. She asked me if I would mind if her sister was her MOH and I was one of her BMs (in all honesty, NBD since I was surpruised she didn't ask her sister to be MOH in the first place). But then she went on to explain she wanted her sister, not because she is her sister, but because her sister and her mom helped her make the STDs, and that her sister would be able to help her with more since she is closer and that it would be more "even" - i.e. she can get more work out of here sister because she is geographically closer to F than me. This left me a little stunned. I was already planning on throwing her a B party and talking to her mom, sister and other BMs about a shower, but as far as "requirements" go, I thought I only had to buy the dress (which she never even to bothered to ask me about a budget for and requires me to drive 2 hours to the closest bridal shop that carries that designer) and show up on the day of looking presentable.
I can understand if she feels slighted by me not asking her to be a part of my own bridal party, but honestly, I am tired of dealing with her. She has a tendency to one up everyone and make everything all about her and I just did not want to deal with this in my BP. I am not planning on stepping down from hers, since I would like to still be friends with her and I am still very happy for both her and her FI. Not really a question here, but just a vent. I'm a little miffed by this, even though I know I shouldn't be. I'm working on getting over it.
CN: Friend asked me to be her MOH two years ago when she got engaged. A few days ago, she demoted me to BM and made her sister her MOH because I'm not close enough to be more actively involved in planning her wedding.