Would this be weird or inappropriate?

ohwhynot

I'm trying to put together a Christmas card, and I'm thinking of using 3 pics - one from the wedding of H, me, and the 2 kids, one of the 2 kids at camp last summer, and this one from this Halloween:




The wii is my son, the angel is my daughter, and the devil is their stepsister, E.  The card will go to people who don't know E, but the halloween picture is so cute I want to use it and while I could crop it to cut out E, she and N purposely went as something together, and it would seem kind of mean to cut her out. 

On the other hand, how weird is it to include E when most of the people on my list don't know her? 

She calls me her "stepmom," lol, and she's coming over this Friday to spend the night with my kids (mostly to make up for last week, when my ex watched the kids a couple of extra days), so we have a good friendly relationship with her.  She and my daughter, obviously, are very very close. 

But is it too weird and borderline inappropriate to include a pic of her in our family Christmas card?  I'd run it past her mom to see if she had any objections, if I decided to go with it.  Thanks for your opinions!

AllAboutTheBenjamin

From where I sit - I don't think there's anything wrong with it since she's their step-sibling.  But I like that you're going to ask her mom just in case.

SarahPLiz

Include whoever you want as part of your Christmas card. Its your family, and you can define it however you like. 

Celles

I don't think it's weird at all.  I'd be cool with it even if she was "just" a friend -- but she's your daughter's step-sister, and that makes her family.  As long as her mom is on board and you aren't trying to claim her as your own (like my half-sibs' crazy step-mom, who insists on introducing them as "her" children), then I think you're fine. 

It's an adorable pic and I don't blame you for wanting to share it.   That Wii costume is really creative!

Night_Sprite

She's your family now, so get mom's okay and then call it good.

TheCranberry

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_would-this-weird-inappropriate?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:9bad459d-e505-486d-805b-42210e230bfbPost:33b7394a-ff2b-42e1-9913-cb3f32dc7583">Re: Would this be weird or inappropriate?</a>:
[QUOTE]Include whoever you want as part of your Christmas card. Its your family, and you can define it however you like. 
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

Exactly. 

She may be offended if you crop her out of a picture to include in your Christmas card.  That seems so much more deliberate and potentially hurtful than if you choose one that she's not in.  Do you include captions or notes with your cards?  If so, you can list who is in each picture and just list her name or add that she's their stepsister. 

Steph0871

So she's your ex-husband's step-daughter, right?  (Just trying to follow along!)

Regardless, I don't think it's inappropriate, and it's a very cute picture.  FWIW, my mom has included pictures of us with friends in Christmas cards, just because they happened to be in the picture we wanted to use. no big deal.

LesPaul

I think it's fine, as long as her mom ok's it.  I think it's a cute picture.

Wrkn925

My Mom is a photographer, and has snapshots everywhere, makes a bajillion prints, has a house overloaded with framed pictures, all that stuff.


She sometimes includes my half-sister by my father, because she considers her part of me.  I'll bring her to family functions on my Mom's side, too.

In this day and age, the definition of family is a blurry line, in a good way.  If she's someone important to you, or important to someone that is important to you, I'd go with including her.
If you choose to use this photo, don't crop her out, that could be hurtful.  If you decide you are uncomfortable including her, use a photo that she wasn't originally in.

noodle_oo

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_would-this-weird-inappropriate?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:9bad459d-e505-486d-805b-42210e230bfbPost:cf1859f4-08b2-4ceb-923a-d08b2690d1f6">Re: Would this be weird or inappropriate?</a>:
[QUOTE]I think it's fine, as long as her mom ok's it.  I think it's a cute picture.
Posted by LesPaul[/QUOTE]


Ditto to this.  As long as her mom is okay with it (like "that's so cute! Sure, go ahead!" okay with it).  If she thinks it is weird at all, then don't do it.

But just be prepared for lots of people to ask who she is if they don't know her!  Or you could write a little note about her (if you are ordering from like Vistaprint, you can have a caption printed on the card).

dmiller9274

As long as her mom is ok with it, I don't think it's weird at all.  I think it's very nice that you all get along so well.

ichellemay1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_would-this-weird-inappropriate?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:9bad459d-e505-486d-805b-42210e230bfbPost:c511faec-eeab-401f-90b4-0a45b6b37e2b">Re: Would this be weird or inappropriate?</a>:
[QUOTE]As long as her mom is ok with it, I don't think it's weird at all.  I think it's very nice that you all get along so well.
Posted by dmiller9274[/QUOTE]

Ditto this.