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I need to vent

Just so everyone knows, I'm about to get a bit whiny. I'm aware that by starting a post on here, I am opening myself to criticism and that's fine, but I just need to get this off my chest and my friends can't be objective in this situation.

I should start by saying I have a pretty good relationship with my mother. In fact, my parents were so kind as to let FI and I move in with them to save for the wedding. I am very grateful to them for that. They've also mentioned that they'll contribute to the wedding, which I'm also quite thankful for. But, for the life of me, I cannot get my mom involved with the planning. I know that's not her job and I don't need her help....I just want it. She told me she couldn't come dress shopping because she wasn't feeling well. I found my wedding dress and when I came home to tell her she was already in bed and I just got a "That's nice, honey." She and my dad had a very small wedding without any bells and whistles and, though she hasn't said anything, I get the feeling that she thinks my wedding is over-the-top. It's really not, but I do want it to be a little fancy. I don't go in and say "Let's plan" or anything, but, for example, tonight, I mentioned that my MOH had asked me for a list of people to invite to the engagement party that my bridesmaids are throwing me and I asked for her input. She said, "An engagement party? That's very high-society, don't you think?" And I told her that they were fairly commonplace and she shrugged and said (quite unenthusiastically as she was walking away, "People who have them typically only invite immediate family and a few close friends." That's probably the most input she's given me. Like I said, I've always had a pretty good relationship with her and it just hurts that she's so unenthusiastic about my wedding. I guess it could have something to do with my brother being away at boot camp, because anytime I bring up wedding stuff, she just nods and changed the subject to him and the letters he wrote her and have I written him recently? I understand completely. I love and miss my baby brother and it's been very tough on us having him away and he is her only son...but I'm her only daughter and sometimes I just want my mommy.

End rant.

If you took the time to read this, I applaud you. I think I even lost patience with myself halfway through. I do hate whining and I don't usually let myself wallow in self pity like this. I think I'm getting my period. Sorry that you'll never get that two and a half minutes of your life back.
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