His single (obnoxious) friends

BethMarie63

So - my fiance and I have been together for over two years and have been engaged since August.  A few of his single friends give him crap all the time about us spending so much time together, and they often question why he does things for me.  They crack jokes all the time in baby voices and when I call him I can hear them all in the background making kissy sounds and giving my fiance crap.  When they first started doing it, my fiance and I thought it was funny and we would laugh about it, but it's gotten to the point where I feel like they just don't have any respect for us or our relationship.  It's very frustrating and makes it awkward for me because I feel like they have something against me.  Any advice on what I should do?

krmabojo

Me being who I am, I personally, would comfront his immature friends myself. Tell them to cut the crap, grow up and act like an adult.

If you are not like me, then either your Fi or you AND your Fi need to talk to them. I know I could not stand that stuff.

denimdarling88

Ditto pp; I'm really a "what you see is what you get" kind of person who would've called them on it if FI hadn't stepped up to the plate yet.

I strongly suggest FI tell them it bothers the two of you and go from there.

buddhagouda

How old are you and your fiance? How old are his friends? I honestly don't see letting this bother you. They're just being stupid. Ignore it. It doesn't damage your relationship in any way. 

evabee

I've been with my FI for 4.5 years and his friends are relentless! They definitely teased him when I was on the phone, but it was their way of dealing with the awkwardness that is losing their boy to his girl. If either of us had made a deal of it they would have had more to make fun of. Instead, we played it off, teased right back, and I never got upset about it. I grew up with all boys, and learned very early on that showing that something bothers you will only encourage them to do it even more!

I would leave this to your FI to handle. Just like he doesn't want his mom yelling at his friends when they've been mean to him, you should allow him to handle his rude friends however he deems fit. I would keep in mind that they're not trying to hurt YOU, they're teasing HIM, and he should know best how to defend himself. 

Since your feelings are hurt, you should be able to tell your FI, but be aware that it may not actually bother him to get teased, and it may be fun just to think of some good one liners to join in the humor of it and still stick it to them. 

May be TMI-- but one time when the teasing got a little heavy I sent a supremely dirty/sexy text to the main perp followed by "oops sorry, that was meant for FI". They thought it was funny that I was joining in on the roasting, it was a dig on their singleness, and it was a win for my man's ego! Of course, this was back in college, ssoooooo.....

SarahPLiz

YOu got responses on this same post on the Chit CHat board as well. Guess you didn't like them.

To repeat my response from over there, there is nothing for you to do. YOUr FI needs to stand up for himself, and for your relationship. If you go telling his friends off, this will not make the teasing stop. He will then get teased for being whipped and having his  girl stand up for him when he can't.

Just ignore it. Tell him it bothers you. If it doesn't bother him, then you have an FI issue, not a FI friend issue.

BethMarie63

Thanks for all the words of advice.

kimheartsscott

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_his-single-obnoxious-friends?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:cb501b0a-bf48-4916-9375-8acf23f34e17Post:e2c7b62b-181b-4954-a39f-8032ebfdfff3">Re: His single (obnoxious) friends</a>:
[QUOTE]It seriously sounds like everyone involved in this situation is 20 years old. 
Posted by buddhagouda[/QUOTE]

Hey now, my fiance is 20 and he doesn't have stupid friends.

OP, can you imagine how much worse it will be if you go tell his friends to stop being poopy-heads to your wittle future gwoom?  And if all of a sudden it bothers him, it may be obvious you're putting words in his mouth.  Suck it up.  His friends are annoying, so just ignore them.

BethMarie63

My fiance and I were both equally fed up with the jokes.  He talked to his friends yesterday about it without me having to say anything.  They were really apologetic surprisingly. 

And his friends are 28-29 years old.  As if it matters.

FutureMrsJGraves

Really? Just tell them to stop being jealous, nut up, and find their own women, because acting like 12 year olds is exactly what got them where they are now, single.

HappyTummy613

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_his-single-obnoxious-friends?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:cb501b0a-bf48-4916-9375-8acf23f34e17Post:d25ba212-75fc-4a7a-b307-60249879e281">Re: His single (obnoxious) friends</a>:
[QUOTE]wow "nyrek"- what great advice....(sarcasm)
Posted by Festiva[/QUOTE]

BURN.

LucymyLucy

I guess I am just taken by surprise that 28- and 29-year-olds would act that way in the first place. Those are not men; those are boys. But don't worry yourself about it. And if he loves you, he shouldn't let it bother him. He should be proud of you calling, being lovey dovey, all that jazz.

nyrek

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_his-single-obnoxious-friends?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:cb501b0a-bf48-4916-9375-8acf23f34e17Post:d25ba212-75fc-4a7a-b307-60249879e281">Re: His single (obnoxious) friends</a>:
[QUOTE]wow "nyrek"- what great advice....(sarcasm)Posted by Festiva[/QUOTE]

Response relative to ridiculousness of question.