Snarky Brides

BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this

Bankrupting yourself just to conceive makes you a bad parent before you even have the child.

I understand some people really, really, really want kids.

But this is just an awful thing to do.

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"Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
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Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this

  • Why should money stop someone from being a parent?
  • Oh god.  That's so not a smart thing to do.
  • It's completely irresponsible to bankrupt yourself for IVF treatments.

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
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    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • I do not think that money itself makes anyone a good or bad parent, but bankrupting yourself deliberately to conceive? Gee, you might find it a tad more difficult to care for that child with lousy credit. That, and it just not very responsible behavior. Good parents are responsible people.

    I am NOT condemning people who file BK. Anyone can have a disaster or two and just as importantly anyone can screw up badly and learn from it.

    But this? No. Not good. 
  • K ByteK Byte member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    Hey, maybe she conceived high order multiples and can whoore them out to a TV show for big money! Yell
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:60dc9d27-f3af-4ee5-aaab-bd9c1337eefa">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]I do not think that money itself makes anyone a good or bad parent, but bankrupting yourself deliberately to conceive? Gee, you might find it a tad more difficult to care for that child with lousy credit. That, and it just not very responsible behavior. Good parents are responsible people. I am NOT condemning people who file BK. Anyone can have a disaster or two and just as importantly anyone can screw up badly and learn from it. But this? No. Not good. 
    Posted by Lenore2010[/QUOTE]

    This is what I mean. I don't judge people who get IVF. I don't judge most people who file for bankruptcy. And I don't think being poor makes you a bad person/parent (My own parents filed Chapter 13 when I was in high school).

    But deliberately doing it to yourself just so you can get pregnant is selfish. I mean, what's the plan once the kid comes along? I know not everybody has the means to be completely financially prepared for parenthood, but these people shot themselves in the foot, so to speak.

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
    image

    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:ffb0a9cb-adcd-4bcf-a6e7-c73ea3f6b469">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hey, maybe she conceived high order multiples and can whoore them out to a TV show for big money!
    Posted by K Byte[/QUOTE]

    I guess I should be slightly more approving that this couple apparently didn't use student loans to cover it, lol

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
    image

    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:ba8d033e-de2e-46ed-afb7-42756f6e3bfb">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why should money stop someone from being a parent?
    Posted by Belle2Be[/QUOTE]

    Seriously? You think that what they did is okay?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:35a1c012-0630-4636-bc21-df8429d49b94">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this : Seriously? You think that what they did is okay?
    Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

    I'm pretty sure Belle's just a pot-stirrer.

    <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_married">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_married</a>
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:35a1c012-0630-4636-bc21-df8429d49b94">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this : Seriously? You think that what they did is okay?
    Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

    I think that people do far more selfish things every single day.  As a mother myself, I would never condemn another mother for the lengths she had to go to to have a child. If you want to make fun of someone, make fun of the insurance companies and pharmaceutical companies who feel its appropriate to charge hundreds of thousands of dollars and capitalize off of couple who want to be parents but can't (biologically).
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:bbf2f00f-809e-4833-bf0c-e6cb192c19b3">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this : I'm pretty sure Belle's just a pot-stirrer. <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_married" rel="nofollow">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_married</a>
    Posted by betrothed123[/QUOTE]
    I'm not, I'm just curious, hense the no snark intended disclaimer. I can't find a search function to look as I"m sure its been asked.

    I'm sorry you feel that any opposing opinion to your own is "stirring the pot" though. I'm not known for being a sheep.
  • Yeah, I think Belle's a pot-stirrer. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:4c1abac2-3d0d-4b0e-aa5f-170d9f81520d">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh God, guess I was dead wrong. Yeah, starting your child's life off with massive amounts of credit card debt and then ultimately bankruptcy is a GREAT way to bring a child into this world. I do want to point out that I find it interesting that many insurance companies will cover IVF treatmentents, but not certain chemo treatments.
    Posted by mag920[/QUOTE]

    It's not a great way, I never said that. It's not particuarly brilliant, but again, I don't know that I would let something a fickle as money get in the way of me being a mom.
  • It's just like anything else in life that is expensive. If you want it that bad, you save up for it and be responsible about it.

    Like for me, I am dying to renovate. What would you think of me if I said that I quit my job, took out several loans, and maxed out all of my credit cards just to renovate my house? And now, I'm going to file bankruptcy and I don't care because I have the house that I always wanted.

    That would be pretty shitty, right? Yep. It would.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:7d1754aa-43a0-4608-add8-eb0c70b4c2aa">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this : I'm not, I'm just curious, hense the no snark intended disclaimer. I can't find a search function to look as I"m sure its been asked. <strong>I'm sorry you feel that any opposing opinion to your own is "stirring the pot" though. I'm not known for being a sheep.</strong>
    Posted by Belle2Be[/QUOTE]

    Don't put words into my mouth.  I did not say that you were a pot-stirrer because you disagreed with me.  People disagree with me plenty and I have no problem with that.  You're a pot-stirrer because posts like the one I linked are only ever created to start drama.  Why do you care why married people are still here, if not to create drama?
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • Ignore Belle.  I've seen a couple of her posts now, and I think she likes to get people riled up.  If I could add a couple of post examples I would.  I'm a computer knob though.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:4e8d212c-6449-40b2-8ea3-7db4bbd820d9">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's just like anything else in life that is expensive. If you want it that bad, you save up for it and be responsible about it. Like for me, I am dying to renovate. What would you think of me if I said that I quit my job, took out several loans, and maxed out all of my credit cards just to renovate my house? And now, I'm going to file bankruptcy and I don't care because I have the house that I always wanted. That would be pretty shitty, right? Yep. It would.
    Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

    IVF can be outrageuosly expensive. So much that a middle class couple could never save enough in their lifetime.
    I don't find superficial things like a car or renovating comparable to motherhood.
  • reddy123reddy123 member
    First Comment
    edited July 2010
    I was pretty disturbed by the Brittany one: Someone thinks it's cool to have your baby on your lap while driving because she did it?! 

    Also the one before it calling the girls out for getting in a pissing contest about the severity of their miscarriages. We all know theBump is nutty, but to me this takes the cake.

    Photobucket
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:0a0eed2b-aff6-46b8-904f-4aa8b9e21433">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this : Don't put words into my mouth.  I did not say that you were a pot-stirrer because you disagreed with me.  People disagree with me plenty and I have no problem with that.  You're a pot-stirrer because posts like the one I linked are only ever created to start drama.  Why do you care why married people are still here, if not to create drama?
    Posted by betrothed123[/QUOTE]

    Because after I'm married, I don't plan on coming here. Hence the reason I asked the question to others, on the non-snark board, might I add, to get other perspectives. To broaden my thoughts, all that jazz.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:4e8d212c-6449-40b2-8ea3-7db4bbd820d9">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's just like anything else in life that is expensive. If you want it that bad, you save up for it and be responsible about it. Like for me, I am dying to renovate. What would you think of me if I said that I quit my job, took out several loans, and maxed out all of my credit cards just to renovate my house? And now, I'm going to file bankruptcy and I don't care because I have the house that I always wanted. That would be pretty shitty, right? Yep. It would.
    Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

    Exactly.  When you put yourself into bankruptcy you're putting your safety and health at risk.  What happens if their home is taken away?  What if they can't pay for food?  That's perfectly fine because they have a little bundle of joy that will thrive on nothing but love?
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • megk8ozmegk8oz member
    First Comment
    edited July 2010
    DH and I want to eventually have kids. We know having kids is expensive. Anybody that knows anything knows that having kids is expensive.

    Like I said earlier, I don't think being poor necessarily makes you a bad parent. But bankrupting yourself on purpose just to get pregnant is incredibly selfish, and starting out parenthood in that kind of financial mess on purpose make you a bad parent.

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
    image

    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:cba8e26f-3840-4451-ad7f-2beb36b47d08">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this : IVF can be outrageuosly expensive. So much that a middle class couple could never save enough in their lifetime. I don't find superficial things like a car or renovating comparable to motherhood.
    Posted by Belle2Be[/QUOTE]

    But what about adoption? That's not as expensive is it? Why couldn't they save for that? I know plenty of people that have.
  • I've never heard of an insurance company helping with infertility until the knot. I had a friend who went through IVF and had to pay for it all herself, out of pocket. She is actually pretty well off from being financially savvy, but even for her, three times trying it was a HUGE amount of cash.
    Photobucket
  • Who has the right to judge someone else's choices on how their children come into the world? Not everyone is fortunate to conceive with no problem. Others who have fertility problems deserve to have kids however they want. Mind your own business and stay out of the bedroom and familial plans of others. Some people have tons of kids and can never afford anything becuase they have so many mouths to feed. Some people have one kid and spend money on everything except their child yet they have finanacial means. The government has been broke for years, but it keeps spending money. If health insurance pays for viagra for a man to get a woody, why can't couples who want to conceive get more help? Don't blame the would be parents. Blame the system and get off your high horse.
    Wedding Countdown TickerVisit The Knot!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:0e86eb2b-624c-4a71-99c0-8a4873282a97">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this : But what about adoption? That's not as expensive is it? Why couldn't they save for that? I know plenty of people that have.
    Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]
    That is a fine line to walk, to tell a person that since they can't afford their own biological child, that they have to adopt one. While its an honorable option, it's simply not for everyone. Money can always be made.  Children can't.
    Also, adoption in itself isn't easy, its a long process and can also cost a good chunk of money.
  • Oh, and Belle? Cew's right about comparing it to a renovation. Babies are not a necessity. Not everybody has to have one. And years after my parents filed for their bankruptcy, they were able to get themselves into a position where they could afford to adopt my youngest brother.

    So yes, if you're going to sink that kind of money into conceiving, and you can't afford it, that makes you irresponsible and stupid.

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
    image

    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    I think that is so incredibly stupid and irresponsible. Stupid, selfish behavior like that is just why we are in the financial situation we are currently. Nature was trying to stop them from breeding because they are obviously defective (stupid a-holes). Did we learn nothing from jurassic park?!
  • ::Pats Suppa on the head::
    kd.joseph's wish is my command
    image
    Just call me "Brothel"
    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
    my read shelf:
    Betrothed 123's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:4e3a22f9-88ae-4940-8cf8-511c0be787be">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]Who has the right to judge someone else's choices on how their children come into the world? Not everyone is fortunate to conceive with no problem. Others who have fertility problems deserve to have kids however they want. Mind your own business and stay out of the bedroom and familial plans of others. Some people have tons of kids and can never afford anything becuase they have so many mouths to feed. Some people have one kid and spend money on everything except their child yet they have finanacial means. The government has been broke for years, but it keeps spending money. If health insurance pays for viagra for a man to get a woody, why can't couples who want to conceive get more help? Don't blame the would be parents. Blame the system and get off your high horse.
    Posted by suppahipbride[/QUOTE]

    <div>We don't care how they do it, we care about the quality of life for the next ten years for the child and the parents in severe debt. You should re-read meg's thoughts because I think you aren't catching what exactly we're judging.</div>
    Photobucket
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ok-cant-only-person-annoyed-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dbc4c6ae-34bf-4c7d-957e-905b8aef740cPost:4e3a22f9-88ae-4940-8cf8-511c0be787be">Re: BPS: Ok, I know I can't be the only person that is annoyed by this</a>:
    [QUOTE]Who has the right to judge someone else's choices on how their children come into the world? Not everyone is fortunate to conceive with no problem. Others who have fertility problems deserve to have kids however they want. Mind your own business and stay out of the bedroom and familial plans of others. Some people have tons of kids and can never afford anything becuase they have so many mouths to feed. Some people have one kid and spend money on everything except their child yet they have finanacial means. The government has been broke for years, but it keeps spending money. If health insurance pays for viagra for a man to get a woody, why can't couples who want to conceive get more help? Don't blame the would be parents. Blame the system and get off your high horse.
    Posted by suppahipbride[/QUOTE]

    Bless your heart.
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