October '13 Newbie & ceremony question pls help!

megra03

Hi Everyone!
My name is Megan, FI's name is Matthew.  We got engaged in September and are planning our October 19 wedding.  So far my checks are : reception venue (catering too), DJ, photographer, my dress, also about to confirm on florist, cake baker, limo, and finalizing STD's.   
Here is my question for the October knotties!  What percentage of your guests that are coming to the reception also come to the ceremony??  We are guessing just under 200 for the reception, but my church is very small and only seats about 120.  Do you think this will be OK?  I'd rather not have my pastor go to another church to accomodate, but I don't want our guests to have no where to sit either!  What do you think? 

Thanks!!!

jerseychic24

You should invite all your guests to the ceremony if they are gettiing invited to the reception.  So I would suggest cut down the list or find a different place to have the ceremony

thejucheidea

Unless you're having a small, intimate ceremony with just you guys and immediate family, you have to invite everyone to the ceremony AND the reception -- that's proper etiquette.

modernage01

Congratulations! I know it may not be proper etiquette but my future sis-in-law had a similar problem and they only invited close friends and family bc of the church size and all of the reception only guests were completely fine with it. Up to you though!  They actually got married in Ohio as well! 

Tonya729

I'd be fine with not going, but if I were super close to you I may have a slight problem...but I for one dont go to very many ceremonies anyways.. 2 girls I work with got married, Im super close to them and didnt go to there ceremonies. I figured usually close friends and fam go to that.

SewInLoveWithDMB

I agree you have to invite all guests to the ceremony if they are getting a reception invite, but I think the original poster was asking what percentage do you expect to actually come to the ceremony in addition to the reception.

In some circles - the answer may be "100%" but in my area, that is not very common.

Unless the reception and ceremony are held at the same location and close together in time, there will be guests that just won't make it to the ceremony. Although I know it's really bad of me, there are MANY ceremonies that I have missed. To validate my actions, most of the time, the ceremony was at, say 12:30 pm and reception start time was 7 pm, with a half hour distance between the two. (This exact scenario just happened to me in December)

Although rude and not very considerate of your guests, if you want to be certain that you do not fill the entire church (or go over 120), have a large gap between the two (and a long distance). If I were a guest, that ensures I won't make it to both (cause I think "how on earth do they expect everyone to do this? Not doing it - just going to the reception.")

But - I'm not proud of my actions of missing (many?) ceremonies, and guests that really want to attend the ceremony may just end up being annoyed with you.



But to answer your question, in my area, I would say that a church that seats 120 for an expected 200 guest reception *should* be fine.  If your circle really values ceremonies, then you might need to find a bigger church.

megra03

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2013-weddings_october-13-newbie-ceremony-question-pls-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:1925524f-fa8b-432f-a7b5-be486ce756efDiscussion:4533a832-e44b-4a0e-90ed-f6a18d8d1b06Post:9818fdf3-067e-4f5a-b0d6-808a9a40d04a">Re: October '13 Newbie & ceremony question pls help!</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree you have to invite all guests to the ceremony if they are getting a reception invite, but I think the original poster was asking what percentage do you expect to actually come to the ceremony in addition to the reception. In some circles - the answer may be "100%" but in my area, that is not very common. Unless the reception and ceremony are held at the same location and close together in time, there will be guests that just won't make it to the ceremony. Although I know it's really bad of me, there are MANY ceremonies that I have missed. To validate my actions, most of the time, the ceremony was at, say 12:30 pm and reception start time was 7 pm, with a half hour distance between the two. (This exact scenario just happened to me in December) Although rude and not very considerate of your guests, if you want to be certain that you do not fill the entire church (or go over 120), have a large gap between the two (and a long distance). If I were a guest, that ensures I won't make it to both (cause I think "how on earth do they expect everyone to do this? Not doing it - just going to the reception.") But - I'm not proud of my actions of missing (many?) ceremonies, and guests that really want to attend the ceremony may just end up being annoyed with you. But to answer your question, in my area, I would say that a church that seats 120 for an expected 200 guest reception *should* be fine.  If your circle really values ceremonies, then you might need to find a bigger church.
Posted by SewInLoveWithDMB[/QUOTE]

Thanks for the responses!   Yes, I have no intention of tiering the invites. I plan to invite 200 to come to both the reception and the ceremony. But I do know that there will be people that do not come to the ceremony (especially because they are about 50 minutes apart).  I think I am going to play with how many additional seats I can fit... or most likely change churches - maybe where my parents were married, to keep some sentimental value.  I guess its just like when you cook for guests, you don't want to come up short on food, I don't want to come up short on seats!