how to invite one co-worker and not the rest!

mapicella82

Hi group!

So my headline says it all. I work with a small group of people (20) and though I'm friendly with all my coworkers, I'd only like to invite one. Most are international, where they're used to having weddings with 500+ people, but I really can't invite everyone. 

My question is, is it okay to ask the one co-worker not to say anything to the rest? 

odustudent22

Wow, that's tuff.  Maybe if you make sure you mail the invite to her home, and not the office....i don't know.

mtbentley

I work in a small office too, I am inviting two coworkers, one who I am especially close with and another who is a BM/brother's GF's mom and she is very close to my family. I'm friendly with everyone else but we are having a smallish wedding so only close friends and family. If anyone were to ask me that is what I would tell them, but otherwise I will just invite those who I am closest to and not bring it up to everyone else. 

SFlvr83

My fiance and I are both inviting people from work...but only a few. We both work with a lot of people and are really close with some. It is common at my job for some people to be invited to things and others to be left out so I don't think it is a big deal. I am just trying not to talk about the wedding too much in front of the co-workers who aren't invited.

Ajoyd

It is okay to ask her to keep it low key, but if people ask her if she is going don't make her feel like she has to lie.

I'm sure she can be discrete enough to not bring it up at work.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_august-2012-weddings_how-to-invite-one-co-worker-and-not-the-rest?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:1fb748ee-7a4e-40eb-b4b4-e553486f4cacDiscussion:2ec2d82d-7cf2-4af1-8e22-92a9f3df671bPost:d93bead2-2339-4d4c-b8d1-d9e3cdab081d">Re: how to invite one co-worker and not the rest!</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiance and I are both inviting people from work...but only a few. We both work with a lot of people and are really close with some. It is common at my job for some people to be invited to things and others to be left out so I don't think it is a big deal. I am just trying not to talk about the wedding too much in front of the co-workers who aren't invited.
Posted by SFlvr83[/QUOTE]

Same here.  Although I already know of a person or two at his work who have an issue with this.  People need to grow up!

StephyD216

I'm only inviting 3 or 4 employees in an office of 10-15 people. I already have their addresses, and I'm going to ask them to keep things quiet once the invites go out.

i2012do

I have this issue
I work in an office of 3 and I am only inviting 1!!

I have worked with the girl for 2 1/2 years, and the other person we worked with has only been here for 3 months.

I was on the fence about inviting my boss and the company owneer but when i was away with her she basically implied that she would be out of hte country during my wedding and that I didn't need too.

I do feel bad about not ivniting our part time accountant-- but to be honest she isn't someone i see outside of work. I only see that one coworker that is invited outside of work.

I asked the coworker I invites to keep it hush hush and not mention anything.

saraschilling88

I would send the invite to her home, and ask her to keep it quiet if possible.  If your other coworkers find out, just explain that due to budget you have to keep it a small wedding (then change the subject).  Also, try not to talk wedding at work.

KT020803

I have been on the fence about this for weeks! if you can maybe pull her aside and explain you'd like to keep it quiet due to the fact that you can't invite everyone, and to not talk about it too much. I finally just was honest with my close co-workers that I was considering and said that I really didn't want any drama or additional things to worry about and I hope they understand why I'm not inviting any work ppl to the wedding. On the the other hand my FI has been with his company for 12 years so his 'work list' alone is over 50 ppl. A major chunk of our guest list!

mapicella82

thanks everyone! I think that I'll pull my friend aside like many of you advised. It's so hard sometimes, especially, when people know that I'm getting married, and they're excited too. Good luck to you guys with your invite decisions!