Seating chart / family dliemnas

[Deleted User]

Is anyone else dealing with this right now?  We've started tinkering with the seating chart as we have most of our RSVPs back.  We've gotten input from our parents regarding how they prefer to be seated, and if there's any glaring issues to be aware of.  No problems.
Then I get texts and a call from my sister angry with me because her ex-husband is invited.  I'm not going into all the drama details.  He has custody of the kids (6 year old twins, a boy and girl) 75-80% of the time.  They are our flower girl and ring bearer.  I see him a lot more often than my sister and I personally have no issues with him.  
She however, still has hostile feelings towards him (I don't know all the the details, or who's side of the story to believe).  Anyway, she finally calmed down and said it's my day and she'll be there.  BUT, she won't sit with him and wants the kids seated with her.  WTF?

Anyyyyyway, there's a lot more to it than that.... but I just need to know, who else is having these issues and how are you diffusing the situation? 

holycrapitsalexa

I haven't had any issues...YET. We are sending out invites this week so I know they will be coming up! But with your sister....Does she have friends that will be attending that she could be seated with? It doesn't seem as though her ex husband is causing any problems of drama.

[Deleted User]

Yea, I can seat her with a couple from church that she is friendly with. 
Then... where do I put my BIL?   He gets along well with pretty much anyone but I don't want him to feel shafted.
Part of me wants to stick them at the same table with the kids, as dinner is only dinner and then they can get up and move around as they please....  but I don't want to damage the already fragile relationship with my sister.

m tulli

I wouldn't sit them together. Why add any more drama. Sit him with the kids and people who don't have hurt feelings over the divorce. Sit her with friends. Sorry Your dealing with this

Sunshine811

I am dealing with similar drama between some of my aunts and cousins that don't like eachother. The only reason I decided to do a seating chart was to make sure that these people do not end up at a table together because it would be a disaster. I hate that I have to do this.

It sucks that you sister is being like this. I haev no advice, but really hope everything works out.

lb1212

Not sure how much space you have, but could you allow an extra 3 seats at your sister's table? The kids could sit with parentA at dinner and parentB for dessert? Or maybe have a kids only table? Sux that you're having to deal with her drama though.

i2012do

We def. have issues. My dads cousins (brothers) don't speak at all.. and they actually got into a huge verbal argument outside of my great aunts 85th bday party.
One of them is a heavy drinker- so we are seating him not next to his brother and away from the bar.

And my dad's other cousin doesn't speak to her cousin...uh so we wanted to put all my dads cousins at one table- but that isnt going to work.

I think thats the only issues.

[Deleted User]

My mom seems to think she has a solution, so I'm going with her suggestion.  Sister and kids at table with her friends from church, and ex-husband at table with my cousins whom he sees frequently.  And if the kids don't want to sit at one table (because they never stay still), then they can go where they want. 
Stress over!