Grandma called Mom last night with MORE ppl. we did NOT invite! Grr!

transcriber87

I swear! I am so ready for this wedding to be over sometimes!!  OK, My Mom called my Grandma the other day to see if she would help her contact the ones who we are missing their RSVP's..They are on my Dads side of the family.  So my Grandma calls my Mom last night with the list of people she did get ahold of..One of my uncles and my cousins.  Some of you MIGHT remember when my Grandma brought over addresses when we were sending them out and she had added so many that Mom didn't ask for, including the girl who had an affair with my Dad while him and Mom were married.  She is NOT related to me and I haven't seen her in years so we didn't send an invite out.  Well Grandma told Mom, I left a message on Tabby's machine and my mom told her that she didn't invite Tabby and Grandma got all upset because in her mind, that is her family...OK, 2 of my uncles married sisters and my Grandma thinks that because she is a sister to my aunt, she is my family and should be invited! Confusing? Yes! Well my Grandma got upset and was literally crying on the phone with my Mom over it..Mom told her, I don't know if you know this but while we were married, he cheated on me with her...well, my grandma said, that was in the past, you have been divorced from him a long time and need to let it go!  Mom thinks now she just should have kept her mouth shut over it and said OK but really? We invited only close friends and immediate family and I don't consider Tabby my family so Im just stunned, dont know whats gonna happen!  We are meeting with the venue tomorrow to order our menu, pick out table decorations and chair sashes and the guest list and people responding are bouncing all over the place..I have 15 cards out of 80 invites, now that we are following up with people, its become a nightmare! Mom is afraid with all these uninvited guests we might go over our count of 100 or it might even out with the people who are not coming..I could just scream right now! What can ya do in a situation like this?

ohnoitskaroljo

omg that is HORRIBLE. I would totally put my foot down and say HELL NO to tabby coming. I'd even go as far as to call her myself and tell her she is NOT welcome. My goodness. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this!!!

id012

I would not let that lady come!! I would call my grandmother my self and tell her that. Thats like a huge slap in the face to your mom!

transcriber87

Mom could hardly believe it and then said this morning she should have just kept her mouth shut when Grandma brought up Tabby..I mean Im not inviting my great aunts sister just because she is her sister! But this Tabby chick? My Mom and Dad have been divorced 20 years, he remarried right after they were divorced...I didn't invite my step-moms 2 sisters and she has no problem with it that I know of, she probably doesn't even know about Tabby and my Dad in the past but Its been one thing or another with my Dads side of the family since day 1...My aunt and another aunt do NOT get along and one aunt called my mom and said if SHE was there, that she would not come as alot of the family wouldn't and Mom tried telling her she has been to receptions and social situations where she doesnt like a certain person but she got out of Jr. High 30 years ago and can be an adult..That was back in April and now towards the end, its getting crazy again! I know my Mom is looking forward to all this being over because she has been my right hand, doing calls and making appts and buying this and that and paying for everything and I hate this guest list is getting us so stressed! She wants to stay busy to keep her mind off of things which is her being diagnosed with kidney cancer in September and then my Grandma, her mother, died the next month and then she had her cancer surgery with a ton of complications for 4 months so she threw herself into planning this wedding to help me too, working and going to school and raising my 3 yr old daughter but last night really got her (and it takes alot for that to happen) and once she told me, Im ticked off too...Im tired of emailing 2x or calling ppl 2x just to get a yes or no...

Lena2317

Its your wedding, personally I wouldnt let her come because this is an important day for your mom too. I would give tabby a call let her know that your grandmother made mistake and unfortunately the list is for immediate family and friends only and that unfortunately you cant go over your count due to venue restrictions. 

ohnoitskaroljo

Oh girl it sounds like you just need a big ol hug. I'm so sorry you're dealing with all this drama. How is your mom healthwise? My prayers go out to her. Cancer is a b!tch (i've lost many many loved ones to it myself).

transcriber87

ohno..you so right..i do need a hug..i need to run to Moms and hug her too! Thanks for asking about my Mother, my rock!   She is so far doing ok..they got all of the cancer knock on wood but then she got post-op hematomas in her stomach, she is on coumadin and the hospital had it all messed up so she had to go for a lot of scans to check on the hematomas because if they were not shrinking, they were talking about doing another surgery then they found out the part of the kidney that was left had hydronephrosis and her ureter was shut so they had to put a stent in back in March..she went through hell with that thing for 2 months, all the while ordering invites, etc.  We took my Grandmas loss pretty hard, especially my Mom of course,  I think she said she has another CT scan after the wedding sometime in September at the 1 year mark and hopefully she will be cancer free! I worry about her..she said with this stress all of a sudden with the gust list she is chain smoking again

ohnoitskaroljo

Poor thing - I'll be praying. What an amazing woman from the sounds of it though!!! God bless her! Hope they get all the cancer and she goes on to live a long healthy and happy life

jmp2004

And all this crap is PRECISELY why we are going to Vegas.  It's us and 7 family members.  No drama adding people, no seating charts, no BS.

m tulli

If I got a call like that and hadn't gotten an invite I would just assume grandma didn't know I wasn't invited. Hopefully this chick is smart enough and doesn't come