Poll: Kids

SCbrideinTX

So my DH's recent bout of baby fever made me curious how long everyone on here plans on waiting before they start trying for children?So if you plan on having children, how long after your wedding do you plan on waiting before you start trying to concieve?How old will you be when you start trying?

SCbrideinTX

1. How long do we plan on waiting?Probably three or four years. 2. How old will you be?26 or 27

shortgirltx

I want at least a year but would love two years after we are married to start trying and I'll be 26/27.

Mariah&Steven

When we got married I said I wanted to wait about 5 years.  So now about 4 years to go.  We'll see if the urge hits me sooner-though I highly doubt it. I imagine we'll start trying when we're 28-29. My main goal in waiting this long is because I want to travel and I know once we have kids, it's not going to happen.  Once I get my trip to Europe and the East coast then I'll seriously start thinking about it.  Until then-no way, jose.

untsing

We got married a year ago and we are in no hurry, even still.  When I'm 30 we'll revisit the conversation and see if we're ready to start trying.  I just turned 28.

SCbrideinTX

Mariah, that's my feeling exactly! I want to be able to travel and do fun things with DH now while we are still young and have limited responsibilities. And I think we need to be more financially stable.

BanannaP

I'm ready now. But obviously I want to wait until after the wedding! I'd like to start trying a few months after the wedding. I'll be 28 and he will be 35. If he and I were the same age, I'd want to wait at least a year probably. His dad was older (40's) when he had FI and his siblings, and when he passed away this summer, they were all between the ages of 32-36. To me, that's too young to lose your parents. I know it can happen to anyone at anytime, but I don't want FI to be an "older" dad if he doesn't have to be.

stephl3055

David has baby fever.  But we just bought a house and I told him that we need to wait a while before we think about having kids because they aren't cheap.  I will probably go off BC after our one year anniversary in April, and then we will go from there if our money situation is okay.  I'm 25 and he's 28 right now, but by the time we actually have the first, we'll each be a year older.  I think he thinks he's getting old or something.  My mom was 30 and my dad was 34 when I was born, so I'm not as worried about it as he is.  But I'm definitely feeling the pressure from his family 

Mariah&Steven

Steph, I'm beginning to feel a little pressure from Steve's mom.  She's trying not to bring it up, but I can tell it's hard.  For example, when we viewed the house, one of the bedrooms was staged with a crib and changing table and she was like, "oooohhh how cute!" and then last weekend we went to the JJ Pearce Pacesetter craft show and we saw a lot of baby stuff.  She actually already has a bib for the baby's "first Thanksgiving".  She's had that for a year now.  Luckily, my parents aren't pushing us.  But the only reason they're not is because they've got 3 granddaughters that my sister has already produced to keep them busy for a while!  

Donnaaries

We'll be 26/27 we get married (the wedding is in between our birthdays).  We'll wait 2 to 3 years.  I imagine having a first child when I'm 30 (give or take a year).  Like Mariah I really want to get a lot of traveling in before I have children.  I can't stand the idea of working your whole life and looking forward to retirement for traveling, because a lot of the stuff I want to do will probably too physically demanding when I'm 65.In an ideal world, I'd like to have visited all the continents (ok maybe not Antarctica) before I have kids.  A girl can dream, right?

Terriniski

1. How long are you waiting?Probably about 5 years.  Jordan's in grad school right now and with our schedules and income as they are, we would have a tough time arranging for child care and paying tuition etc.2. How old will you be?29-30.  I don't feel one way or the other about it.Oddly enough, the thought of not having kids at all has started to cross my mind.  MIL says that she was the same way until a switch flipped, so maybe I'll come back around.  But right now, I'm happy enough that the idea of growing old just the two of us and getting to travel a lot seems very appealing.

untsing

Alana -- no kidding.  Sometimes when M and I are in the grocery store, spending all that money on just US, we'll talk about how we could be perfectly okay just not having kids.  I like feeling that way actually, because I dno't feel like I'll ever really freak out and go into charting and ovulation meters & stuff.  If God wants us to procreate, it will happen.  If not, we will be blessed with our families, nieces and nephews, friends' children, and our dogs.

BanannaP

My mom has actually backed off the baby pressure since we got engaged, strangely enough. She was like 22 or 23 when she had me, so I think she feels that she's been owed a grandbaby for a while.

Mariah&Steven

Alana, I'm the same way.  Right now, the thought of having kids just doesn't appeal to me...but maybe in a few years.  We'll see.  We've talked about not having kids and oddly we're both OK with that right now but have a feeling in a few years our minds will change.

BanannaP

Wow, I guess I'm the only one who's itching for it to happen already! But I have done a good deal of traveling, and I have two masters degrees and will hopefully have a full-time, permanent job soon. I feel like once we're past the wedding, I will have accomplished a lot of my pre-baby wishes.

Jessicaanne_1

We are actually going to start trying a month or so before the wedding. FI already has 2 and I have 1. So this will be the last one. I will be 28.If we didn't already have kids, I think we would wait a bit. Have some time alone together maybe travel.

BanannaP

Oh! And, we will have been together for almost five and a half years when we get married, so we've had plenty of time with just us.

untsing

Yeah we keep saying how we want to "travel."  But we won't.  LOL Actually, having kids will probably encourage us to travel more, so that we can give THEM the amazing experience of seeing different parts of the country and the world.

Tiffany618

Oddly enough, neither mine or FI's parents want us to have kids. My parents say all the time that it is a wise decision not to have kids.   His parents would be fine either way.To answer the question though, probably 4 years or more if we ever do.

maykious

My ideal plan would be to wait until FI is finished with his PhD and working a steady, higher-paying job so I'm not the only breadwinner. (Side note:  he's a grad student assistant working full time and gets paid the same as I do.  I need a better job.)  By that time, we'll be 28 or 29, so I think it's a good age (for me) to start.  But we may reconsider as he gets closer to the end of his program or if he does get a better-paying job.I know traveling with kids is difficult and more expensive, but my parents traveled with me all the time.  I don't see kids as a barrier to travel.  My parents are the ones who instilled the travel bug in me.  I know there will be plenty more limitations when I have kids, but I'm not going to use them as a reason not to go somewhere if I have the desire and ability.

stephl3055

Mariah, our situation is very similar.  My mom and step-dad have grandkids already (step-sister has 3), and my dad and step-mom have 2 (half-brother has 2), so they aren't pushing us at all.  They've just asked if we will have kids in general. His parents have no grandkids, so we will probably have the first.  David's grandmother even told us a few months ago that we better have our first kid soon because she wants to meet it before she dies...talk about pressure. 

Mariah&Steven

Mandy good point.  My first real experience on an airplane was actually our honeymoon.  How sad is that?  I definitely want my kids to have more traveling experiences than I did.

Mariah&Steven

David's grandmother even told us a few months ago that we better have our first kid soon because she wants to meet it before she dies...talk about pressure. Oh geez!  Way to put a guilt trip on you!  Wow!

kris928

I already have one, but we still want to wait a year or 2 after we're married. I should say I want to wait, FI already has the baby bug!! I'll be 29 and FI, then DH, will be 31.

Donnaaries

We're actually prioritizing our vacations based on what's considered kid-friendly travel and what's not.  Trying to get things crossed off the list that aren't kid-friendly before we have 'em. I guess we're the independent traveler types.  Some destinations are a little too rough and rugged for kiddos.

maykious

Weirdly, I'm really looking forward to being pregnant.  I know all the terrible things that come with it, but I think I'm really going to enjoy the overall experience.  I'm ready to get pregnant now.  I might even be ready for a baby now (or at least, after the dog is fully trained...).  But I'm not ready for kids now.  Really not. FI said he'd start working on it now (if not a year ago) if I had said I was ready then.  It scared me a little.  Luckily, he doesn't really have baby fever, but when I asked him what his response would be if I told him I wanted a baby now, he said "ok."  Weird.

untsing

AMY - ME EITHER.  I was talking to a friend once who was TTC and having trouble, and I asked her if they looked into adoption.  She said, "No, because I just really want to be pregnant." I thought "Hmm.  Yeah I really don't."  LOL

SCbrideinTX

I guess my desire to travel first is more for my DH. He was never flown or been on a boat or a train or anything.I've done a lot of traveling, so I want to share that experience with him and just him before we bring any kiddos into the picture.

almoyo

I am at a point where I get really jealous of pregnant bellies. We will probably wait a year or so to start trying. I'm going to discuss it with my gyno next month. I'm 28 now, and hope to have my first at around 30. My husband is ready now, but is cool with waiting a while.

krhoades

We have zero intentions of having kids. I've never wanted them and DH feels the same way. I know that might change but it's looking doubtful. We enjoy our travels, freedom and toys way too much and have some very set goals that kids do not help accomplish.  

tmrhyne00

Our situation is a lot different because we are so much older. I'm 35 and Steve is 40. We are already trying and if we don't get pregnant by April of next year we will start the more extreme measures, if we aren't pregnant by my 37th birthday we will quit trying and adopt. We would love to have one and adopt one.