Is it wrong NOT to have a wedding cake??

Shelly3466

My fiance and I aren't big on cake, infact, we aren't too big on sweet stuff at all!  We are having a very laid back low key party type reception at a waterfront Tiki Bar with heavy Hors Deuvres and an open bar and when the reception is over we will be having dinner there with whoever wants to join us.  We have decided not to bother with the wedding cake because 1) we don't eat cake 2) there are no formalities with this reception except for the first dance, everything else is just a party type atmosphere, we aren't doing the garter or bouquet toss either.  Some of my girlfriends are giving me fits about not having a cake because they say that's the best part - but why should i feel like i need to buy a cake for everyone else?  They have dessert there if they want to order it.  Is it wrong not to have a wedding cake??  Please help!

jessicabessica

I would host some kind of dessert for your guests, but it doesn't have to be wedding cake.  You could have a dessert buffet or passed mini desserts or something to keep it a little less formal.  I'm a big fan of offering a couple of dessert options and a chafing dish of chocolate with fruit and poundcake for fondue, which is also good for people that don't like sweets as much. 

The reception is a thank you for guests for attending your wedding, and guests shouldn't need to pay for things on their own, which I'm assuming is how you're saying they could get dessert. 

Allycat11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_wrong-not-wedding-cake?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:23Discussion:3b1cdd1e-a0de-4074-90b0-a8267be398f4Post:aa774f42-a700-447d-b946-2500805caa5b">Is it wrong NOT to have a wedding cake??</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiance and I aren't big on cake, infact, we aren't too big on sweet stuff at all!  We are having a very laid back low key party type reception at a waterfront Tiki Bar with heavy Hors Deuvres and an open bar and when the reception is over we will be having dinner there with whoever wants to join us.  We have decided not to bother with the wedding cake because 1) we don't eat cake 2) there are no formalities with this reception except for the first dance, everything else is just a party type atmosphere, we aren't doing the garter or bouquet toss either.  Some of my girlfriends are giving me fits about not having a cake because they say that's the best part - <strong>but why should i feel like i need to buy a cake for everyone else?  They have dessert there if they want to order it.</strong>  Is it wrong not to have a wedding cake??  Please help!
Posted by Shelly3466[/QUOTE]

Because a reception is the way you thank your guests for coming to your ceremony and guests should never open their wallets.  At receptions it is polite to offer some kind of dessert, the type is up to you.

GApeachOH

How about a savory dessert? Maybe you can talk to a pastry chef or a cake baker in your area to hash out a plan. Sometimes, the chef can be versatile.
Like a souffle perhaps. Creme Brulee, if done right is not typically overly sweet. Or a savory cake flavor? What about a cheesecake? Or, get a head count and offer cupcakes on a stand then the two of you can just have a pinch to satifsy your girls. Or have fun with it and take a finger of icing and smear it on each other..
There are options out there for a more savory dessert option. Just talk to a local baker or pastry chef.
Good luck!

ElleB87

I'm doing fondue for dessert instead of cake - but it's also just going to be FI and I.  I don't think it's "wrong" not to have one but I would probably still get a cake for the guests because I know it would be a big hit.

MyWedding13

As long as you have a dessert option for your guests, you don't have to have a wedding cake. I think it is traditional to have one and I hope you don't regret not having one, but there is nothing wrong with it. 

Bjenn12

There is nothing wrong with not having a wedding cake. It basically is there for decoration for everyone to ohh and ahh over. Like everyone else said, I would still have some kind of dessert option though.

shopgrl3177

Wedding cake is one of my favorite parts of a wedding, so I would be a little disappointed if there was no cake.  However, it's you and your FIs wedding and what you serve should be a reflection of you.  Since you're going to a waterfront Tiki bar you could do key lime pie, or even fresh fruit.  I would put out something sweet for those of us who have major sweet tooths

iloveu4ever

Nothing wrong with that.

mollyehren

Based off of your theme I would maybe considered something tropical like a pineapple upside-down cake