pre-ceremony drinks....makes sense or sounds strange?

eeetea

outdoor garden ceremony, mid June, at an historic mansion (followed by cocktail hour & dinner at same), ceremony to start promptly at 7, we are encouraging guests to come early (music will be playing starting at 6:30) & enjoy the beautiful grounds & have a drink so we can start on time.  we envisioned offering sparkling water and champagne as guests arrive.  banquet manager told us that offering anything alcoholic is very bad idea b/c people will hold on to their glasses and our ceremony photos will be ruined by used glasses that will show up in the pics, but if we offer soft drinks only, people will be more apt to allow wait staff to collect the glasses.  we thought this sounded strange, altho we don't want to risk ruining our pics.  we r disappointed not to offer champagne....

does it seem chintzy/cheap to have just sparkling water and lemonade or iced tea?

has anyone ever heard of this or been told the same?

i conferrred with my photographer on this, he said he has not noticed it to be an issue.

maybe banquet mgr is worried about running out of clean glasses???? (but we are having only 80 people in a space that accommodates up to 125)

or maybe they want to avoid going through more bottles of champagne ("house" champagne is included in our package)?

kaesha

You know, we were planning on having a welcome cocktail too, but were talked into serving pineapple lemonade instead, and in retrospect, I'm really glad we went the non-alocoholic route. I think that did a couple of things: none of the guests were tipsy or drunk during the service and having to wait until after the ceremony makes sense in terms of building excitement.

Plus. we were outdoors in Hawai'i, and the booze tends to sap energy. The lemonade totally restored it.

jagore08

We served refreshments before the ceremony too but they were non-alcoholic.  I think if you were to serve alcohol before you need to also have something for them to munch on.  You don't want your guests to get tipsy before the party starts.  But it is nice that you want to make sure your guests are comfortable.

tldh

I will defer to the married ladies.  However, our caterer is encouraging us to let the servers greet our guests (at a historic house) with a signature cocktail.

kaesha

I don't think serving booze pre-party is a terrible idea... I think it does have logistical problems. The problem with serving just one drink, is there are inevitably people looking for a second or a third... and at that point you have to decide if you're:

a) going to open the bar (making it difficult to round people up for the ceremony because they've started to party - let's be honest, if you're having a heartfelt ceremony you probably want people in the same mindset as you)
b) having the wait staff either pass around unlimited cocktails (potentially causing drunkeness)
c) having the wait staff tell people they're only getting one (not ideal in any circumstance - I know I hate limiting grown adults' choices)

So long as you come up with a solution that suits you and your guests, I think you can do it... but it is something that has been known to backfire.

felkels

Personally I say if they are only there for a half hour before, drop the drinks and make sure everyone has found their seat so the ceremony can start promptly at 7.  If you insist on serving something, go soda or juice, or maybe some gourmet punch or something...You don't want your guests ruining your day because they drank to much in that half hour right before your wedding on an empty stomach. 

Myroni03

What about a champagne punch fountain? The drink is mixed with white grape juice, some ginger ale, and then some champagne. There is very little champagne in it compared to the other stuff but its still a very refreshing flavor and won't get anyone drunk.

sarahmilbury

I got married at a winery, all guests were bused to the venue and had a private wine tasting event before the ceremony.  Some people probably had glasses in their hands during the ceremony, but frankly wedding ceremonies are horribly boring and are really only for the bride and groom anyways.  I wish more weddings set you up with a primer drink before having to sit through a boring ceremony.  I think I have one picture of the guest sitting down with one person having a glass in their hand.  I certainly don't think it's ruined any pictures - only reminds us of the wine tasting event the guests had before hand.

Right after the ceremony we had a champagne toast and the full bar opened along with all the wines. Then we served appetizers with that. 

Serve a drink - if your guests don't want one they won't drink one. Don't worry about glasses in your pictures unless they are formal and people know how to put a glass down for posed pictures.

fallingwater

I worked in catering for years and the reason we always discouraged people from having alcohol before the ceremony was for a few reason:
- don't want people getting drunk before ceremony
- don't want glasses all over the place
- you want something refreshing and you don't want anything getting out of control just yet - keep it light.  A sparkling punch or something would work well (sparkling by adding soda water or sprite or ginger ale)
- sometimes it gets too expensive for the caterer (whomever is providing alcohol).  If your venue allows for a 5 hour open bar, they would want to count this part in and then they would have to take an hour off the end of the wedding, which many guests dislike.

I think something sparkling works perfectly, as well as soda, water, and iced tea.   

jaclyndoherty

I went to a wedding where they gave glasses of champagne before the ceremony. I thought it was awesome and set the mood for the entire wedding. One of the best weddings I've ever been to! I dont know how the couples pictures came out but I am definitely all for the idea.

kllson

Tipsy guests can sometimes lead to chatty guests during the ceremony. I'd say if you really need to do drinks before your ceremony to just do sparking water.

bbyckes

This is similar to what I'm doing.  Guests as they arrive will be offered sweet tea, lemonade or bottled water.

dees14

I love the idea of sparkling water or lemonade beforehand, although I don't think it's necessary. I wouldn't do alcohol... I know that when I have a drink, I get really talkative. It could end up a disaster giving a whole crowd alcohol and then making them sit there and be quiet! Ha ha..