Am I ever going to be able to eat at a restaurant again??...

JenniferKuhl1

Hello everyone!

I'm new here!  I am getting married on 10/12/13 and am DETERMINED to lose the 20 lbs I put on during my last two years in nursing school before the wedding... I would prefer to lose most of it before taking engagement pics and trying on dresses. 

I have been doing good at counting calories on an app on my phone - I limit myself to 1700 calories a day, and try to burn at least 2,100 calories a day.  I am in my last semester of nursing school, so I don't have much time to work out, but I do what I can - when I graduate in May the real workouts will start!!  

So here is my problem - my fiance and I have started argueing because he  wants to go out to eat and have a few beers on the weekends, and I don't want to go because I can't stand to see my calorie count sky-rocket for the day.  And I don't have the willpower to sit there and eat something boring and bland while he enjoys a good meal.  So how do I balance it?  Does anyone have any suggestions of restaurants with some lower calorie options?  Or ways to limit calories at the restaurant!  I'm so sad, I feel like we are never going to be able to enjoy a night out again

J&K10910

Dude...if you don't ever allow yourself to enjoy things like ridiculous meals out, pizza, wine, beer, chocolate, etc, you will FAIL.

Seriously.

It's ok to go and eat a calorie, fat, and sodium laden meal at a restaurant sometimes.  So you have a couple of options.  They all involve some sort of compromise. 

1.  Compromise with your FI and go out every OTHER weekend.  Enjoy what you want, but be reasonable.  Restaurant portions are huge.  Eat half, take half home.  FIs are great for eating unwanted leftovers.  Choose a drink OR dessert OR an app.  Get steamed veggies or rice instead of fries and steal a few of your FI's fries.  Share something with him.

2.  Compromise with your eating plan.  Go out every weekend, but make healthy choices 3 out of the 4 weekends a month.  Look at menus online before you go out and check out nutritional info.  Make a healthy choice BEFORE YOU LEAVE THE HOUSE, and stick to it.  Be careful with salads, they're not as healthy as you think.  Ask for things without butter/oil, grilled instead of fried, steamed, etc.  You can even call ahead and ask about alternative healthier preps that they will offer if you ask.  Once a month, go ahead and get whatever it is you want.

3.  Compromise with your eating plan again.  Eat a healthy snack before you go, and get something smaller and delicious (like an app to share) while you're there.

4.  Send FI out to get food and beers with a buddy sometimes instead of you going with him.

5.  Compromise with FI--go at lunch instead of dinner.  Portions are smaller.  More lighter options like salads, wraps, sandwiches.  Plus the prices are cheaper!  Pick up some fun beer on the way home for him to enjoy with your healthy dinner.  Or he can drink at lunch, who cares?

gananoque

The problem here is not restaurants, or your lack of will power (totally understandable, by the way!). The problem is your unsupportive, selfish fiance!!! WTH? He needs to have your back and help you achieve your goals!

If he needs to go boozing and eating at unhealthy restaurants, he needs to do that with the guys. Sounds like he's being incredibly insensitive here. Shape up, fiance!

anna.oskar

Seriously, J&K is wise so i have nothing to add but: ditto.

xctennis

What J&K said.  There are almost always healthy options to be found at restaurants.  Order salad without the dressing or on the side, extra steamed veggies instead of mashed potatoes, grilled instead of sauted, and fruit instead of a standard dessert. 

You can't be so calorie paranoid that you don't leave the house to eat because that isn't healthy either.  

Good luck and it's good to see that you're determined but remember that it won't happen overnight.

MerriGettingMarried

There are healthier options on every menu! My thing is...don't drink your calories. Have a tasty meal, but watch your portion and drink WATER. It's amazing how many calories they pack in these cute little fruity drinks.

Water with lemon. Or cucumber if you're feeling really fancy.

acaponi87

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_getting-shape_am-ever-going-able-eat-restaurant-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:238Discussion:a5d6fb5b-8c7c-4c42-86ef-efa081c701bbPost:092139f7-1b2c-4f48-b787-5de0e484e63b">Re: Am I ever going to be able to eat at a restaurant again??...</a>:
[QUOTE]There are healthier options on every menu! My thing is...don't drink your calories. Have a tasty meal, but watch your portion and drink WATER. It's amazing how many calories they pack in these cute little fruity drinks. Water with lemon. Or cucumber if you're feeling really fancy. :)
Posted by MerriGettingMarried[/QUOTE]

I don't really do this on purpose but I drink a TON when I eat, especially when I'm eating out. Even if I get a beer or something (which I do a lot) I'm slamming water and that actually fills me up so I don't eat as much

MerriGettingMarried

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_getting-shape_am-ever-going-able-eat-restaurant-again?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:238Discussion:a5d6fb5b-8c7c-4c42-86ef-efa081c701bbPost:d76687b5-eb57-4a3f-bd80-736fe06de553">Re: Am I ever going to be able to eat at a restaurant again??...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Am I ever going to be able to eat at a restaurant again??... : I don't really do this on purpose but I drink a TON when I eat, especially when I'm eating out. Even if I get a beer or something (which I do a lot) I'm slamming water and that actually fills me up so I don't eat as much
Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

Yes! I read or heard somewhere once to drink a whole glass of water before a meal so you're more full and want less.

Water is the miracle drink. lol

em01092

Ditto J&K. I'm on WW, and we get extra points that we can use all at once or spread out throughout the week. I usually treat myself once a week and pretty much eat whatever I want that one or maybe 2 days, depending on what it is I choose to eat. I always still track the points, and sometimes I don't even use as many as I thought, so I have some left over for the rest of the week, which is nice when I get an ice cream craving or something. 

So what I'm saying is, if you watch what you eat all week, and eat light during the day you plan to go out, having one larger/less healthy meal probably isn't going to sabotage your entire week's efforts. Just don't go crazy and don't forget that it's a treat, you can't do it every day. 

JenniferKuhl1

I just wanted to thank everyone for the comments  - They really helped snap me out of my bad mood! 

FI and I made a deal to cut down on our going out to one night a weekend and the money we save by not going out as often will go towards the wedding!  We even might have a couple friends over next weekend and try cooking at home instead! 

Starfish0116

J&K is totally right. One of the things that made me fail was depriving myself. I did WW many years ago and lost all 15 pounds I wanted to lose and got lifetime. Once I made my goal weight I got slack in eating whatever I wanted, a lot of it was also because I deprived myself of all the foods I really loved.

Now I'm back on WW and it's going SO much better. Not only do I exercise a lot (something I didn't do before) but I also splurge every now and then on eating out.