WL Journey "Compliments"

GracefulMeadow86

So i just thought i'd share these with you ladies since i know you'll appreciate them. I seriously love my FMIL, but sometimes she could use to censor herself just a bit. Like last night:

FMIL: "How much have you lost now?"
Me: "About 15 lbs"
FMIL: "Your stomach looks flatter, but not your butt"

And another one (same night)

FMIL talking to another guest at our house: "When he met her, she was like this" **holds up one finger to signifiy i was skinny** "Now she's double" **holds out both arms**

And i'm just going to laugh it off because if i don't, i'll go crazy. At least my stomach looks flatter LOL

jennabob

haha she sounds like my grandmother!!!!  Ugh, maybe its a generation thing?  My grandmother ALWAYS explains people by their weight and never forgets to tell you when it looks like you've put on a couple pounds. 
Sounds like you've got a good attitude about it though...keep your head up and be proud of your flat stomach (and all your hard work!) 

Nebb

Oh thats just like my mom, my favourite is still "youve lost a lot from the middle, which is good because you used to look like a barrel", and recently "you have lost a lot, but you still have thunder thighs". Thanks mom.

I havnt gotten many in person comments from anyone to be honest though, she only comments when I bring up how much ive lost, no one else has noticed or commented. The only people who have are online people who saw my progress pics a few weeks ago.

GracefulMeadow86

HAHA maybe cultural? FI's grandmother said the last time i saw her "Wow you got bigger". Whatever happened to not saying anything if you dont have anything nice to say? lol

GracefulMeadow86

are you sure your mom and my FMIL aren't sisters, nebb?

Nebb

Must be! I think some people just dont have a filter or dont realize how the things they are saying will be recieved.

greenglasshero

So funny!
I've actually gotten the most compliments from my FMIL & FSIL. That might be because I see them less often than the rest of my family, but I'll take it. I think the most flattering thing is when people as what you're doing that works so well & actually try it! So far I have a couple friends who do 30DS & my step-mom and I have a 'work out' night where we'll do pilates or power walking (kinda goofy, but it's a good 'together' activity.)

GracefulMeadow86

i think she thought the first one was a compliment all the way, and the second one...no clue what she was thinking...i dont think she was. haha.

everybody else is super supportive so i just try to brush these types of things off.

demeoja

wow, this goes along with what I posted the other day about someone asking if I was pregnant.  I guess people feel like it's okay to be mean to someone if they feel like crap about themselves.

Nebb- my mom this the same way.  She is the reason why I developed my issues with food in the first place.  When I was an adolescent she would always tell me I was too fat (even though I was a healthy weight) which made me feel self-conscious and put on weight.  I do think it's a generational thing!  They think they are being helpful, but it does a lot of damage!

Also, Nebb- I saw your before and after pictures.  Don't let it discourage you that people haven't said anything to you about your progress.  You are doing great!  Keep it up, weight is just a weird issue that *SOME* (not OP's FMIL) people are afraid to talk about.

GracefulMeadow86

yes, i agree demeoja. on the whole people feeling like crap about themselves thing (which is just downright mean but i think this is whats happening in my case too) and about nebb looking AMAZING

lisanowacki

I also tend to think it is very difficult for people to compliment your success when they are not happy with themselves...and perhaps its even a form of jealousy. IGNORE IT! I dealt with that too...and then there's the "Don't lose too much weight" comment which is just as annoying.

As far the the "compliments" go, that made me giggle. Reminds of how when I have an occasional pimple (luckily I have clear skin most of the time) and there always that person who points out, "You have a bite right there." Thanks idiiot...it's not a bite, it's not a bug bite, it's a pimple and thank's for pointing it out to me.

UGHHH...people.

FavoriteOne

My dad once remarked that we were parking farther away & walking because "you need it, right?" I think he meant that I would appreciate it because he knows I'm losing weight. I just said a big fat "EXCUSE ME?!?!" He studdered for a bit after that. lol. Poor daddy.

swim1011

Well, I guess at least she was being kind of nice with the first comment??  My family never, ever comments on weight loss.  Everrr.  I gained some weight in college, and my mom's comment was, "You shouldn't wear tank tops, your arms are too fat for it."  Trust me, my arms were not fat then, and they still aren't now.  I think she was projecting her body issues onto me, and now I just ignore it.  And I wear tank tops all.the.time. during the summer, mostly because I love them.. and partially to make her nuts,lol.