So, my FSIL and I were chatting on FB the other day and she had mentioned to me that their grandma was feeling out of the loop & being left out of things from the wedding process...She didn't even know there was a shower until she got the invite in the mail a few weeks ago...(mind you, FSIL could have mentioned it to her, I'm sure she did, but maybe she didn't idk...) Plus, I really didn't know too much about the shower until two months before, but my mom wasn't giving me any details...I gave her guest list & she went from there....I feel bad that she feels bad for feeling left out, because that definitely wasn't any intention of ours to do that. We just had things planned & went along with it...Is it my responsibility to be like, Hey mom! you NEED to ask Gma for help or she'll feel left out?!?!?! (I didn't know she'd feel that way)...Now, I'm feeling guilty that I hadn't included them more in things...but what is there to include them in??? I don't want them to feel like they don't matter...they just never ask about the wedding nor do they call....idk idk...
I told FSIL that there really hasn't been much planning to do. The wedding is completely different from FSIL's wedding where they all cooked for the wedding & put everything together...it's not what FI & I wanted...we wanted the day to be as stress free as possible for all of our family, friends & guests...no food to be cooked, no decorating, no setting up or picking..we wanted people to do that for us so we all could enjoy the wedding more. We booked the vendors (I don't need her approval on those things)...and I told her that point blank...
The only thing we really need help with is the finances...we're barely going to make it to pay for people (I've already gotten 2 no RSVPs for the wedding, but things might change between now & then!) but hey! thats all good
But we're not asking anyone to help financially unless they offer...even then we probably won't take it...
FI says I just need to relax because 1) his grandma likes to be in control 2) it's over & done with 3) we're planning the wedding how YOU & I want it....
Now, as long as he continues to back me up and stick up for things then we're good...I'm just afraid that something might be said at the shower and I just don't want to hear it...ugh...WHY THE DRAMA!!!! It's like you're damned if you do, damned if you don't...