wedding party

abo1031

Is anyone else not having bridesmaids or groomsmen? As of right now I have four bridesmaids. But I am the type of person who likes to plan, have schedules etc.. It just seems like no one is interested in being a part of this wedding. I realize everyone has a life of there own and other things going on. But it just seems like everytime I try to get everyone together for something wedding related its an issue. Im getting really frustrated and am just starting to think at this point if no one wants to be involved, why not just do it myself? My future sister in law who normally I get along with really well seems to make every excuse in the book to not be involved in anything wedding. She is now refusing to go bridesmaid dress shopping until after March, when she's getting a boob job. For me, that's cutting it a little too close for comfort for my Sept 7th wedding. Im going bridal gown shopping in January and so far the only person coming with me is my Mom, which Im fine with.. Is anyone else going at it alone and not doing a bridal party? If so how's it working out?

ftrmrsw

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I wouldn't unask them to be your BM's. maybe they were just busy with the holidays. Try again in the new year. As for being involved, there's not a whole lot for them to do now. If you FSIL doesn't want to go dress shopping till March, tell her when you're planning to go, invite her to join you but if she misses don't let that stop you from picking a dress. All it means is she won't get a choice and will have to wear the dress you've picked. Not all my BM's can make it to everything all the time. They all have their own lives and sometimes it's hard to align 5 schedules so just go with the flow. And just a word of the wise: take it from me it's easier to go BM dress shopping with one person (probably your MOH) and pick a dress for everyone. Unless of course you're letting everyone pick their own dress. Otherwise you'll get so many opinions and its likely no one will agree 100% which is stressful on you. I took most of my BM's and the dress I loved was not the dress my MOH loved but at the end of the day it was my wedding and my vision, so I picked the dress I liked best and that I thought would look best on everyone.

ftrmrsw

Oh and don't stress too much about waiting till march. We're getting married Sept 28th and won't be ordering our dresses till The end of April.

leatba

And also remember that no one is as excited about your wedding as you are. Some people still think it's too early for us. I have 8 maids total. I chose a dress a while ago and let them know what the dress and color was. I won't be saying anything to them again until May. Any projects I have completed have been done solo or with FI. Only 1 maid has a schedule like mine but she has a life if her own. I only expect them to buy the dress and show up on time the day of.

leatba

And also remember that no one is as excited about your wedding as you are. Some people still think it's too early for us. I have 8 maids total. I chose a dress a while ago and let them know what the dress and color was. I won't be saying anything to them again until May. Any projects I have completed have been done solo or with FI. Only 1 maid has a schedule like mine but she has a life if her own. I only expect them to buy the dress and show up on time the day of.

gottadance64

I am having my sis as MOH and 2 BM - all three of them are out of town...but my sis is my best friend and my 2 BM are also best friends/like sisters, so I couldn't just choose anyone else. (Frankly I just wanted my sis to stand up and his bro, but fiance insisted on having more standups). I picked the BM dress color/material and a general length and then I told them to pick their own figure-flattering style from a line at David's Bridal, but to run it by me before purchasing.  I've suggested that they start trying on dresses early in the new year. I'd say if they don't have them purchased by April, I'd be concerned, but I don't see that happening. None of them will be coming with me dress shopping, but I have some aunts and cousins who want to come, so it'll be nice to share that experience with them.

attymeg

Totally agree. They don't need any mojo till Spring/Summer to get excited about any kinda wedding activity. I have been in weddings where I was dragged all over Hell's half acre to bridal shows, dress stores, etc. and did it, but you KNOW nobody gets excited about that stuff. 

Love11506

My MOH who is my FSIL isn't excited right now but that's due to the fact her and her boyfriend broke up and she thought they were going to one day get married so I try not to talk wedding but sometimes it just comes out lol!

abo1031

Thanks for the advice everyone. My MOH is my bestfriend and has been great with being involved. I just set an appointment and told all my BM's the day and time and said anyone who wanted to come can come. I know my MOH will be there so if she's the only one then I guess she gets to pick the dresses lol... Im trying my best just let it be. And I have a similar situation with my FSIL, she has been with her bf for almost 3 years and I think me and my wedding get a lot of resentment that its not her getting married so she doesn't want to be as involved because she's jealous. Hopefully as it gets closer she and my other BM will want to be more involved and if not then my MOH and Mom are amazing so at least I know I'll have them lol.. Thanks ladies!