September 2013 Weddings

Is there anything you're not looking forward to?

Fi and I have gotten into a couple arguements in the past about the wedding and alot of it being *NOT* what I wanted. I wanted a small wedding at a trendy restaurant with our closest friends and family. We're instead having 150 people in a fairly large venue. Its become more cookie cutter wedding that I wanted and dreampt of.

There are things I look forward to... Like Getting all dolled up and putting on my wedding dress, hanging out with my best friends. I'm really looking forward to the ceremony and everything it cymbolizes. I'm looking forward to all the wedding related activites leading up to the wedding. And I'm looking forward to seeing the over all vison come together.

I'm NOT looking forward to the reception portion. At all. If I could go from the Ceremony to the airport I would. I'm sure the reception will be fun and I'm sure our guests will have a great time. I'm just not looking forward to it. Probably becuase it wasn't what I wanted, so I'm disappointed and therefore just Meh... about it all.

Is there anything about your wedding your not excited about or looking forward to?
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Re: Is there anything you're not looking forward to?

  • Yes, trying on wedding dresses!! I am really not looking forward to it at all, I am very self conscious about my weight/body and a little nervous about how it will go. Ive been busting my ass off trying to get in better shape, but my stomach is my problem area, after having two kids and Im just nervous I wont be able to find a dress that makes me feel good.  It dreading it and have been putting it off but I know I cant put it off any longer.

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  • I wanted a DJ but my FI insisted on a live band.  I wanted a band called Jake Speed & the Freddies that are upbeat and play a lot of gigs around the area and do weddings often.  But they were $1500 and the band we're getting is $600.  The band I wanted was totally worth it but I was completely overruled not only by my FI, but my family agreed with him.  I'm sure the band we hired will do a great job but I fear they won't excite the crowd as much and have as much diversity. 

    I also wanted a photobooth but I got overruled on that too. 

    Other than not getting my way, I guess I'm happy with everything else and look forward to everything. 
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  • Some of the planning stuff that we have left is not going to be fun.  FI and I have had very different visions from the start and we've been learning how to compromise.  I'm pretty happy with the way things are coming together, but it's not always fun to figure out how to get there.

    I really don't want to deal with figuring out what our groomsmen are going to wear.  We're getting married at noon.  Traditional etiquette says that you shouldn't wear a tux before 5.  I wanted a more laid back vibe so I'm great with that.  Only FI wants to wear a grey tux and wants all his guys in grey tuxes.  We'll probably go with that, but it's stressful to me.

    I don't want to do the whole seating chart thing.  That's going to be so much fun! /sarcasm
  • Well my family lives in TX and I know most of my relatives won't come due to the fact they live so far away.  So we started a seating chart it looks like this except we drew out each table and the room on a poster board so I can visualize the room. 
    This is a GREAT way to pin down your seating chart!

    Well if you have ever watched Friends where they have the little flags for either side of the bridal party.  And there were more flags for the one and not as many for the other that's what mine looks like.  And after we start getting RSVP's back my side is going to get smaller and I really want them there and will get upset when they do start declining even though I know some of them will.
  • Seating chart, first dance and father/daughter dance.  I looked at a seating chart template and immediately closed the file - I know I'll have to reopen it eventually but I really don't want to!  As for the dances, I don't really dance until I'm smashed...good and freaking wrecked.  I'm pretty quiet and don't like to be the center of attention, so I've been trying to be a little more outgoing so it's not such a shock to my system.
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  • Bostongirl - Around here I dont think anyone gives seeing a tuxedo before 5pm any thought at all. We're also going for a Grey tux for the guys. I believe the top contender is Vera Wang Black.

    I didn't think the seating plan was going to be hard but the more I talk to people (family) the more I realize its probably going to be more challenging than I thought.
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  • We originally had planned on not doing a seating chart.  I just wanted a casual feel and thought everyone could sit where they want except for a reserved table for immediate family.  But having read the ettiquette board and seeing that non-assigned tables you should at least put out 10 more chairs in case of people moving around, we decided we better just buck up and assign tables.  I'm going to HATE it.  But I'm paying $315 to a rental company for extra seating already.  I don't want to add more seats.
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  • Okay i know this will sound strange but im not looking forward to the first kiss. Kissing in epics was awkward enough and my whole family keeps laughing about how i might pull away from him or give him a kiss on the cheek! I have never kissed anyone in front of friends or family so it just feels weird. Haha and the dancing... man, I better be drunk all day!!!
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2013-weddings_is-there-anything-youre-not-looking-forward-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:26a515ec-8009-4599-b81d-5edee3b3fb3cDiscussion:cd6403be-806d-410a-a323-cce8f9821f55Post:20e7a6e9-16e7-450e-a3e4-431343c4027c">Re:Is there anything you're not looking forward to?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Okay i know this will sound strange but im not looking forward to the first kiss. Kissing in epics was awkward enough and my whole family keeps laughing about how i might pull away from him or give him a kiss on the cheek! I have never kissed anyone in front of friends or family so it just feels weird. Haha and the dancing... man, I better be drunk all day!!!
    Posted by mrskloop[/QUOTE]

    All of this.  Especially the dancing part.  I better keep my very own special stock of Reisling to me out dancing.  And we have NEVER danced together.  Ever.  3+ years together and it's never happened.  .. I think I just broke out in armpit sweat.  LOL
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  • Goofy Im just glad to know Im not the only one! I was starting to feel bad... haha
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2013-weddings_is-there-anything-youre-not-looking-forward-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:26a515ec-8009-4599-b81d-5edee3b3fb3cDiscussion:cd6403be-806d-410a-a323-cce8f9821f55Post:20e7a6e9-16e7-450e-a3e4-431343c4027c">Re:Is there anything you're not looking forward to?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Okay i know this will sound strange but im not looking forward to the first kiss. Kissing in epics was awkward enough and my whole family keeps laughing about how i might pull away from him or give him a kiss on the cheek! I have never kissed anyone in front of friends or family so it just feels weird. Haha and the dancing... man, I better be drunk all day!!!
    Posted by mrskloop[/QUOTE]

    This too. When we were doing engagement photos we would just look at each other like we were lost and the kissing was strange.
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  • There are a few things I don't look forward to. We are trying not to spend so much so its starting to get hard on planning like the guys clothes as we are paying for everything. I'm scared we are spending all this money and hardly anyone will come. I didn't/don't look forward to all the planning. There are many things but then I think to myself , that it will all work out in the end.
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  • I'm just hoping that when the day is done I will still feel like all the money we're spending, mostly due to what I want, was worth it.  When I look at the account and see the zeros I don't want my mouth to drop open, hands to face, Home Alone style in post-wedding shock. Because now of course it's growing.  But once we switch from saving a lot to spending a lot I hope I'm still smiling pretty.
  •  I am getting really stressed out about hotels. FI family is from another state, and have very little money. So if we want to find them a cheaper hotel it will have to be out of the city, in the suburbs (which is where the wedding is anyway) but that also means they will need a rental car.  I dont know how much money they will have for everything and i started to let it get to me. then i decided (and this might seem a little bridezilla) but it's fiance's family he can deal with it. They have had 2 years to plan, I cant let their finances worry me. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2013-weddings_is-there-anything-youre-not-looking-forward-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:26a515ec-8009-4599-b81d-5edee3b3fb3cDiscussion:cd6403be-806d-410a-a323-cce8f9821f55Post:e8ccc276-efa0-40eb-b533-2a01fd7fea25">Re: Is there anything you're not looking forward to?</a>:
    [QUOTE] I am getting really stressed out about hotels. FI family is from another state, and have very little money. So if we want to find them a cheaper hotel it will have to be out of the city, in the suburbs (which is where the wedding is anyway) but that also means they will need a rental car.  I dont know how much money they will have for everything and i started to let it get to me. then i decided (and this might seem a little bridezilla) but it's fiance's family he can deal with it. They have had 2 years to plan, I cant let their finances worry me. 
    Posted by ncwenze[/QUOTE]
    100% agree!
  • edited January 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2013-weddings_is-there-anything-youre-not-looking-forward-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:26a515ec-8009-4599-b81d-5edee3b3fb3cDiscussion:cd6403be-806d-410a-a323-cce8f9821f55Post:e8ccc276-efa0-40eb-b533-2a01fd7fea25">Re: Is there anything you're not looking forward to?</a>:
    [QUOTE] I am getting really stressed out about hotels. FI family is from another state, and have very little money. So if we want to find them a cheaper hotel it will have to be out of the city, in the suburbs (which is where the wedding is anyway) but that also means they will need a rental car.  I dont know how much money they will have for everything and i started to let it get to me. then i decided (and this might seem a little bridezilla) but it's fiance's family he can deal with it. They have had 2 years to plan, I cant let their finances worry me. 
    Posted by ncwenze[/QUOTE]

    <div>I agree with that! Where we are getting married, there are 10 extra rooms and we each have 5 BMs and 5 GMs so we offered it to them first if they wanted to stay there or at a different hotel down the street.  FI's cousin was the first to complain about price so I said "Oh well, he can stay somewhere else."  I'm not going to let myself worry about it at all!  It is $129 for a "normal room" and $149 for a room with a loft bedroom and a living room downstairs with a pullout couch... and these are ALL waterfront rooms.  I think it's a very normal price. Let's say rooms in the city are $200 a night for example, they would have needed to save $8.33 a month for your 2 year engagement... so don't worry about it at all! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" /></div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2013-weddings_is-there-anything-youre-not-looking-forward-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:26a515ec-8009-4599-b81d-5edee3b3fb3cDiscussion:cd6403be-806d-410a-a323-cce8f9821f55Post:7f22e2bb-3b3b-4d6c-ad4c-044e26249091">Re: Is there anything you're not looking forward to?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Is there anything you're not looking forward to? : I agree with that! Where we are getting married, there are 10 extra rooms and we each have 5 BMs and 5 GMs so we offered it to them first if they wanted to stay there or at a different hotel down the street.  FI's cousin was the first to complain about price so I said "Oh well, he can stay somewhere else."  I'm not going to let myself worry about it at all!  It is $129 for a "normal room" and $149 for a room with a loft bedroom and a living room downstairs with a pullout couch... and these are ALL waterfront rooms.  I think it's a very normal price. Let's say rooms in the city are $200 a night for example, they would have needed to save $8.33 a month for your 2 year engagement... so don't worry about it at all! 
    Posted by mrskloop[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>I agree with you 149 (for a view!) is actually a pretty decent price.

    </div>
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  • I'm not looking forward to having my dad's girlfriend and my mom in the same room.  Dad's gf "forbids" him to go anywhere my mom may be, for example recently a 50th birthday party for a longtime, mutual friend of my parent's.  Also, FI's parents came across the country and we were to set up a dinner for my family to meet them.   I invited my mom, dad, dad's gf, etc...my dad wasn't allowed to go because my mom was there, so I had to do two separate dinners.

    If she causes any fuss, I will lose it on her.  I haven't said anything to her thus far.  For the sake of my dad (who won't stand up to her) I do my best to put on a happy face and get along.  From day one, I've asked my dad and mom both to walk me down the aisle.  After that, they can sit across the room from one another.  My mom could care less, and my parents talk to one another all the time, without the gf's knowledge.  I just want everyone to get along like grown-ups.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2013-weddings_is-there-anything-youre-not-looking-forward-to?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:26a515ec-8009-4599-b81d-5edee3b3fb3cDiscussion:cd6403be-806d-410a-a323-cce8f9821f55Post:a80e3ead-6a1b-4f44-84de-c0a860716784">Re: Is there anything you're not looking forward to?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm not looking forward to having my dad's girlfriend and my mom in the same room.  Dad's gf "forbids" him to go anywhere my mom may be, for example recently a 50th birthday party for a longtime, mutual friend of my parent's.  Also, FI's parents came across the country and we were to set up a dinner for my family to meet them.   I invited my mom, dad, dad's gf, etc...my dad wasn't allowed to go because my mom was there, so I had to do two separate dinners. If she causes any fuss, I will lose it on her.  I haven't said anything to her thus far.  For the sake of my dad (who won't stand up to her) I do my best to put on a happy face and get along.  From day one, I've asked my dad and mom both to walk me down the aisle.  After that, they can sit across the room from one another.  My mom could care less, and my parents talk to one another all the time, without the gf's knowledge. <strong> I just want everyone to get along like grown-ups</strong>.
    Posted by semi891[/QUOTE]

    I'm with you on this! I just don't want to deal with the drama of all these people. My mom and dad have been divorced for 27 years and its still awkward!

     

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  • I am not looking forward to ALOT of the things I have left to do. Figuring out the centerpieces, deciding on the food, the way the cake will look, the over all lay out of the reception, the church classes, the flowers, deciding on the tuxes, picking out the invites and save the dates,  ok so i am not looking forward to anything but putting on my amazing dress and marrying the man of my dreams. 
  • I'm not looking forward to making final decisions- I'm super indecisive.  Luckily I have had the week off to get a lot done and have made progress.  I'm a little nervous about engagement pictures- we still have to get them done!  And I'm nervous about my dad being weepy all the wedding day- he's a big mushball!
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  • I'm not looking forward to paying for this shindig as its my second wedding. Also, dieting to fit in a dress that is too small. Yes I bought my dress to small (just one size) but it was only $357 and the alterations that I want done will fix the fit.
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  • I feel ya that I wanted a unique wedding, but it has turned totally cookie cutter. It's hard to get around it, but it is easier to plan it! I am not looking forward to the details, addressing STD's, and finalizing the much debated guest list. BTW I'm going with the Vera Wang Black grey tux too- its beautiful!
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