Favors
Why??
Why is everyone so against everything that is diferent and unique for favors? Why is everyone so pro-edible favors? Are people not going to get enough food at your wedding, where they need a snack after? BE UNIQUE! If you want to have CDs, have CDs! Want plants or seeds? Go for it!! Donations to a special charity or organization? Good for you! I don't understand why people feel the need to provide more food on top of dinner and dessert.
Okay, vent over. I feel better.
Okay, vent over. I feel better.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Why??
I would very likely throw away a seed packet or a cd. As for a donation - the minute I see someone make a spectacle of having made one (yes, I consider announcing it, even if on paper, at a wedding to be making a spectacle of it), it becomes much less of a good deed and far more of a "TELL ME WHAT A GOOD PERSON I AM" act. It's taken even less seriously when the person doing it is saying "and I didn't want to spend the $.07 per person to give you an after-dinner mint in order to make my donation, BUT LOOK AT THE SWANS SWIMMING AROUND IN THE MAN-MADE LAKE I INSISTED ON INSIDE OUR THREE STORY TENT!" Plus, making a donation to a cause/organization I don't agree with/support would be anything but a favor.
I would rather someone have NO favors than obviously "not for the guest at all, but for themselves" "favors." The whole wedding and reception, in essence, is for the couple. There's really no reason to make it even MORE about you (the couple).
90% of people will take a mint or a chocolate or a cookie. If some are leftover, people can take extras (kids never mind this) or you can have them for yourselves. Too many mix cds, seeds, or what have you...and you're just stuck with junk. Plus, it's far more obvious how many people think your "favor" was BS when you look out at the potential sea of leftover "things."
It's not "don't do anything unique," it's more "don't do anything dicky." At least when it comes from ME it is.
[QUOTE]The whole wedding and reception, in essence, is for the couple. There's really no reason to make it even MORE about you (the couple).
Posted by melissamc2[/QUOTE]
We're trying to make our entire wedding day about our guests. Dinner choices, dessert bar, open bar...in essence, you are hosting your wedding and a good hostess always takes care of the guests first.
If you (generic you of course) are truly thinking about your guests, a donation "favor" would NEVER come up. Ever. Same with a cd of music you like. Those aren't "for" anyone, they are "from" someone. The difference may be small, but it's there.
EDIT: Nevermind. I just saw in another post that you're doing a donation favor for an organization that is dear to you. We're never going to agree on this for a few reasons, and that's ok! I hope your wedding and marriage are very happy! Congratulations!
OP: Because most of the things you're suggesting are NOT for your guests. They're something that's meaningful to YOU. That doesn't mean it's meaningful to ME.
Melissamc2 is spot on with her explanation.
CD's with your favorite music? That's not really for me if it's YOUR favorite music. I have never kept a CD that someone made of their favorite music and then "gifted" to me.
Donations to a charity? How is that for me?
Make your donation. I believe in donations. I make them myself. I think they're a good thing to do.
But don't pretend that they're a favor to your guests. Because they're not. They're a favor to the organization, and to you. You're taking the money you'd spend on a little something for your guests and giving it to someone else. How do you figure that's a favor for your guests?
Honestly, I don't need a favor. I don't really want a favor. You're already giving me food, drinks, entertainment. I don't need a matchbook or m&ms (although I LOVE m&ms) as a thank you.
But please don't in any, way, shape or form think that giving $$ to a charity is somehow doing something for me.
I'd liken it to a guest coming to your wedding and giving you a card that says "In honor of your marriage, I have given a donation to the "eastern micronesia tsunami prevention fund". It may be important to your guest, but it probably doesn't mean anything to you. So it's not really a gift for you, is it?
Favors are expensive and are alot of time and effort. And to be perfectly honest, the guests don't care about them. Even though mine were cute, they weren't worth it in the end and I wished I had listened when people on TK told me not to bother. No one cares. They just want to eat, drink, have a good time and if they want to remember your wedding, they'll look at pictures.
With All the Trimmings
Donations to charites are great (I donate regularly to a number of different charities), but they aren't favors to your guests. If you'd prefer to make a donation and skip the favor thing, do right by both the charity and your guests -- don't spend money printing out those AW charitable donation cards; give that money in addition to your predetermined donation to your charity. Unless you are making the donation in the name of every one of your guests, the donation is a tax deduction for your and not them, so they don't need a piece of paper proving the donation happened.