Pre-wedding Parties

Bachelorette Party Etiquette

So, I just found out today that two of my bridesmaids (who are best friends) invited some of their friends (one of whom I don't even know) to my bachelorette party on Saturday night.  This friend of theirs whom I don't know is coming in from out of town because she is "going through a divorce right now" and apparently needs to "get away."  So, they invited her to the party since she's staying overnight with one of the bridesmaids.

I'm pretty astonished, and I feel very stuck.  I don't want this person I don't even know to be there, but she's already been invited.  If I tell the bridesmaids that this person can't come, do I risk being snotty or a "Bridezilla"?  Thoughts?

Re: Bachelorette Party Etiquette

  • kessiebluekessieblue member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think you're going to have to let this one go.  It is technically incorrect of your bridesmaids to invite people to the bachelorette party who are not invited to the wedding, but now the damage has been done.  Un-inviting them would be rude, and two rudes don't make a polite.  But I can see where your bridesmaids were coming from at least as far as the one who is staying with them.  It would be a bit awkward to tell your house guest that you're going to a party and not invite them.  I'm not saying they made the right decision, just that it would be a difficult situation.

    If you are having a low-key bachelorette party, I don't think this should be too much of an intrusion.  I've been invited to bachelorette parties before where I wasn't invited to the wedding (I was invited by the bride herself, though).  As long as it's just people hanging out at a bar, who cares if there are some other people hanging around; it's a public place, people would be hanging around anyway.  (Again, not saying any of this is right; just trying to put some perspective on it so maybe you don't feel so irked.)  If you are going on a spa day with your besties... then it might be more awkward.
  • McKenna2012McKenna2012 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Just let it go. It's one night. And you never know....maybe you'll gain a new friend out of it.
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  • edited December 2011
    I would let it go. And honestly, if I were in your BM's position and that friend was staying with me I would have been inclined to invite her. Albeit, I would have consulted the bride first but I think it would have been rude to leave her at home while she is my house guest.

    It isn't like this woman will be expecting an invitation to the wedding and like a PP said, you may gain a new friend!
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  • edited December 2011
    She should have asked you first, but like PPs said, you'll have to let this go.
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  • HeatherBobHeatherBob member
    Seventh Anniversary 10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    It is your bachelorette party, but if your friends are footing the bills - then you don't really have a choice, unfortunately.
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