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Wedding shower gifts question

themanpuntedbaxterthemanpuntedbaxter
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in Pre-wedding Parties
I'm planning my best friend's wedding shower, and the guest list includes older family members and family friends, as well as some children, so she would like to avoid having to open any potentially embarrassing or inappropriate gifts. However we don't want to give the party a gift theme, so I need another way to politely let people know that it's not a good time to bring lingerie or other personal things. What should I do?
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Re: Wedding shower gifts question

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    trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Does she think that older people don't know that she's going to wear lingerie or **gasp** have sex with her DH? News flash: they get that. Having said that I can't recall many showers where "personal" items were brought. There weren't any at my DD's shower. At my DIL's shower, I think her mom bought her some pretty panties, and a pretty nightie, but it wasn't embarrassing. Everyone ooh-ed and aah-ed about them, and that was the end of it.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    ffmaidffmaid
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Unless a shower is ligerie theme or sex toy theme those items are always innapropriate and guests shoudl understand that.  
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    themanpuntedbaxterthemanpuntedbaxter
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for the input. To clarify, this is what we're trying to avoid: another friend got married recently, and some of her shower guests (that are also being invited to this shower) thought it would be fun to bring her toys, edible underwear, etc. Not a big deal, but since she didn't know what was in the boxes she ended up opening them in front of about 20 prim & proper older ladies. Obviously they all know what's up :-P, but it was just plain awkward. So my friend would rather save those kinds of gifts for another time.
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    trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Okay, I change my answer.  To me, lingerie is one thing.  Bringing sex toys and edible undies is a horse of a completely different color.Can you just talk to the friends who think it's funny to bring those things and ask them to save them for a b-party?  Explain that your bff would be very uncomfortable opening gifts in "questionable" taste at a shower.Surely it can only be a couple of people who would tend to do this.  Because to be honest, I've never seen toys at a shower.  Those are much more b-party items.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    themanpuntedbaxterthemanpuntedbaxter
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Just finished the invitations- hopefully "Household Shower" will be enough to get the idea across. Plus I need to send out her bachelorette party invites soon since the two are only a couple weeks apart, so then the girls that want to buy her personal things will know that there'll be a separate party for that. I hope :-)!
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    bingham101bingham101
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think you would have a good idea just who might bring these items. When they call to RSVP politely ask that they leave the “fun” stuff for the bachelorette party when grandma is not there.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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    ClumsyWifeClumsyWife
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    maybe put in a funny saying about keeping it PG.  also, i think most women who have been to showers have experienced the awkward fun gifts ;) -- the children, not so much...I went to one when I was younger and lingerie was given, i didn't think anything of it, b/c I just didn't 'get it' at that point.TOYS are a different story, I would HOPE that people would keep the toy giving to the Bachelorette party...if there is potential risk for toys to be given at the bridal shower, I would definitely mention something when ppl rsvp. lol
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    ClumsyWifeClumsyWife
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    oh wait, just remembered.a girlfriend of mine had a shower, and a toy was given to her...there were older guests and children in attendance...she just kept the gift in the box and didn't show anyone...she was a bit upset when she received it too...that's a shame.
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