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Pre-wedding Parties

Moms at bachelorette

This weekend, my sister, and bridesmaid, told me my bachelorette would be a week before the wedding. I'm not too thrilled about it, I would rather a little more time in between, especially considering the last minute details that need to be taken care of at that time, and not being able to handle any of them during the last weekend prior sounds a little stressful. I was excited when she brought up the bachelorette party, thanked her right away, and said "but the weekend right before sounds a little too close to the wedding date." She insisted we keep it, and i dropped it because of the obvious "she's doing something nice for you. let it go."

Then I remembered a long time ago she mentioned our mom coming to the bachelorette party, and apparently they still intend to have my mom come. I'm having a little trouble keeping the "she's doing something nice for you. let it go." attitude. I'm told part of it will involve drinking and during the discussion with my sister she said that our mom likely won't drink, or maybe just a little. It just seems to me that having my mom there, the only one from an older generation, will make things a little awkward and people won't feel free to be open and a little wild. The sister planning this is extremely close with my mom and is always 100% herself with her, but me, my others sisters, and definitely my friends will not have this same sense of freedom and inhibition.

I'm just in such a tug of war with myself between feeling I do Not want this to happen, or will it really be as bad as I'm making it out to be?
Do I tell my sister my concerns (which will very likely be met with her just telling me it'll be fine, and don't worry, and you're not allowed to know the details.) or do I keep the attitude of "she's doing something nice for you. let it go."


 

White Knot

Wedding Countdown Ticker

Re: Moms at bachelorette

  • I'm the mother of a new bride, and am about to be the mother of a groom.

    I would have absolutely NO interest in attending any bachelorette festivities.  My daughter's BM's did ask me if I had any interest in any part of it.  I thanked them for considering me, but declined.  Is it possible your mom would do the same?  I do know of some moms that want to attend.  I know of others that insist on attending.  I personally feel that this is one area of the wedding that moms have no need and/or point in joining.

    And although you did not ask for input, I do think having the party the weekend before the wedding will be fine.  It may not seem like it at the moment, but you will probably have most of your wedding plans done by that time.  RSVP's should all be in by then.  Counts to caterers are usually due before then.  Look at it as a way to force yourself to relax and be distracted......the calm before the final chaos!
  • Even if your mom does decide to come, she might leave early. 

    I think it'd be nice if she were invited, but she may not even want to attend. I doubt your friends will not have fun just because your mom is there.
  • I'm still pretty divided but my FMIL and my mom can party as hard as me and my friends so I'm not worried about them keeping up..I just have this squeaky clean image with them that I don't really wanna tarnish with tequila shots and my girlfriends.

    I think I would prefer if they didn't come; I'm going with that. I think my bachelorette party isn't going to include moms. We're having the shower at a wine bar anyway, so we'll have enough happy drunk moments to share!
    Vacation White Knot
  • Typically I would say no to moms but really it depends on the party your having.  My cousin had her party in Vegas and invited everyone in the family, aunts and cousins, but they never left their pool side cabanas.  There wasn't any crazy partying or strip clubs.  Now my mom wants to come to my bachorette and I said no, not because I think it would be awkward but because she is a bigger party animal than I am and I don't want to have to babysit her. LOL so really it depends but I think in most cases the answer is no.  This night is for you and your girls to let loose and have some fun without worrying about what anyone thinks.
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